Do you honestly think you'll be alone forever and why? (Page 2)

Question

It's probably just specific to people on this site, but lately I've been talking to users (mostly guys, but some girls) who believe they'll be alone forever.I don't know where they get this idea. I find that most often times it's people standing in their own way and putting themselves down for things they can change with a little hard work or allowing quasi-rejection or rejection to stop them cold turkey.Do you honestly think you'll be alone forever and why?I'm single, yes. But I'm not going to cry a river about it and wait to die of old age alone... I don't have that kind of attitude and it pains me to see that other people give up so easily. Anything worth having is worth fighting for.

playa_pan · Answer

I used to have the mentality that I'll be single forever and die as a virgin. That was before I met my ex in 2007; since then, I've started changing my attitude and mentality which has led to date my ex for a year and half. After she broke up with me for another motherfuccer, I was depressed and alone. I wanted a girlfriend and became really needy; I became single (and currently still) for 4 years now. About five months ago, I met a girl and we hooked up; surely, I guess she wanted more just than sleeping together, she wanted a relationship/boyfriend.

So I cut ties with her temporarily and I guess she wanted to hook up again.

Yeahhbro · Answer

No I won't be alone I am sure about that. But it will be a long time before I get a girlfriend and much less a wife. The reasons why are not necessarily self-confidence, or lack of knowledge of what to do with girls, I can easily go to a bar and make out with 3 girls, maybe take one back home. My problem is that I can't get over a girl, because I never knew why she rejected me or why she changed, its one of those things that I will never know, and it drives me crazy to know that because I really do like her, maybe I will go as far as loving her. I really don't see any girl who is up to her level, yeah she had her bad things, but to me she was a really desirable woman. I tried to have a relationship with a girl and we broke up it didn't last very long. So for now I just go I get whatever I can from girls and hope one day I can get an answer from her if I ever see her again or if I can find somebody as good as her.

GreenEyesss · Answer

I honestly think I will be alone is just a feeling. Why? Cuzz I love peace and I rather like doing stuff by myself! I don't really like people bugging me. I already met the girl of my dreams the only one I pictured myself in the future with a family and the only one I would have accepted for a good company Cuzz like I said I normally like doing stuff myself, but her she was amazing:] she definitely still has my heart and I still have feelings for I talk to girls try to make something but they don't make me feel the same as I did with her. I never really had the chance to be with her we already had a connection going on but she is gone she left never texted back/; I texted her the next day nothing has not logged to her profile or anything! So that's why I maybe gonna live for the rest of my life I chanpolin colorado este cúento se acàbado Lol

HidingMyHeart · Answer

I've always been used to being alone and I loved my solitude, but comng to college changed that, it changed everything for me, and right now, I'm not sure if there is anyone out there for me because every time I try to put myself out there, I just wind up down on myself again..i guess I'm kinda lonely now and that's not a feeling I've ever truly felt before...its a couples world :(

Anonymous · Answer

It always amazes me womens' attitutdes towards men that see themselves being alone; for a man, we realize its all confidence. when you keep failing over and over and over, and you can't seem to get your sh*t together... despite seeing tons of guys that succeed with women... and tons of women who are always with a new guy, it makes you depressed

and probably the worst part of all it all is that second part- yea, I guess many guys who come to this site out of depression and loneliness (why else would guys be on relationship blogging sites?) realize they might find someone, what guy wants to be the guy after all those other guys

and don't write that off women; deep in the psychology of the male, that's a HUGE deal... knowing the girl you might be with is just out with other guys while you are alone, that hurts.

so yea, it all starts to look really hopeless and ugly... I know it has for me, and that I don't have much faith left

bob01 · Answer

I think that's nearly impossible for a woman to remain alone, as she has to do nothing to make the first step, the guys are the one expected to approach a girl. But the problem in this case is that a girl can miss the opportunity to go to the right guy she sees now. People are different and there sure is someone for everyone, it depends how tolerant we are with each other. As women got into the workforce and earn their income, then it may be hard to find someone who is much over her, cause women fought for equality, so now women are in the situation to choose a man who is equal with you. If you want someone who is above you, than there are not many of those.

Kenny91 · Answer

I am convinced that I will find a girl out there for me..I stay positive... True love does exist... My grandparents were in true love, they were married for 53 years... And they still loved each other till the day they died. I find that older generations somehow seem to get it right...Seriously don't rush it.. I see so many people saying stuff like "well I have been single all my life" yet they are only like 20 years old... Society and the media likes to pressure us into marrying young... They idolize youth, and they convince us that if we don't do it now when we are young, that it won't be as fun later on in life... Its all an illusion that we believe through movies, television and other media outlets. You find love when you aren't even looking

1-3-2-4 · Answer

I myself feel this way.. I thought maybe in my teens I would have luck.. but now I'm 26 years old and never been on a date.. I've had sex but it was with an older women but that was not going anyplace at all..

Then I got my mother nagging me for grandkids and saying how all her other family members have kids and how everyone keeps asking if I'm dating or not.

it's not like I'm not a nice looking guy I've been told I look good but I don't know what the issue is.. yes I do keep to myself but that's how I roll.

I don't like loud girls

if nothing happens when I'm 35 then I just give up..

G_GTom · Answer

I think it's very likely I'll be along forever. My personality is different from most, at least I feel that way and it's more difficult to find a match.

I've talked to women and I've done a lot of reading on this message and a ton of others. After such experiences, I really don't like what I see. I really don't think women are honest ( although every women believe she's the most honest person ).

As a result, I've turned my attention to work and reading ( something other than message boards ). There's not too may opportunities doing that so, I decrease my chances even further.

So is it impossible? No, but I'm also not holding my breath.

Thiezz · Answer

It probably has something to do with the past generally being a pretty good indication of the future. Of course once someone has settled into the idea of being alone forever, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy as they'll stop trying, further reinforcing the mindset.

Ironically I see the pitfalls of this line of thought but still 'suffer' from it myself to some degree. The cup is half empty :p

Anonymous · Answer

Well, not all of us who think that are crying a river per se. Sometimes (ok, often) I feel that idea creeping into my mind but I keep a lid on it. And the reason why people think this is because we can't see the future no matter how much we want to and the tunnel is too long and dark to see the light at the end. Happiness seems to hit you over the head when you're least expecting it and the randomness of it drives some people (like me) crazy because you can't control it. So we just entertain the idea that, hey, maybe I'm just wasting my time, maybe I'll be the one person who's alone forever. I don't think there's anything wrong with entertaining the thought as long as that's all you're doing. It just takes the pressure of finding someone off.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, because guys apparently are intimidated by me.  Others think I am too good for them, so they settle for some chick they met at a bar, etc.  I don't do anything to make guys feel this way except be myself.  I just happen to have strong morals, I am old fashioned, like to cook, and very loving, and supposedly what most men are looking for...but they are scared to take pursuing to the next step for that reason.  Then there are a few who make their way in, and then after like 2 weeks of knowing me they are already talking about marriage.  THAT scares me cause they don't really know as much about me as I think they should, and we hadn't been intimate yet, or even talked about long term plans.  It is crazy.  I am trying though cause I woudl like to meet a great guy.  I just want love to factor in, whereas a lot of people are just seeking companionship.  If that is the case, get a dog. X-D

Anonymous · Answer

I think only a few people hinted at something I'm going to mention. Realistically, there are things about me I know not many guys can handle and I have to accept the fact that this will decrease the pool of men to choose from, if you will.

So, people can say oh, you have to have the right/positive attitude but most of the people who have answered on here...well, do you have a disease that needs tending to for the rest of your life? What if you have something like Asperger's syndrome, Cerebral palsy.

What if you are physically handicapped or even missing your limbs? Would any of you who have answered date anyone like that?

Most of the people who answer like it's so easy haven't taken the time/effort to step out of their *normal* existense to realize there are so many people out there with debilitating issues, be it physical/mental/chronic/whatever that, not only is it difficult for them to find love, they can't even find people to relate to them.

TheMisogynist · Answer

To many guys have been brainwashed into thinking that women are their equals, this causes them to show to much respect to women, which results in them being rejected time after time. If they ever just realize that women need to be treated dogs, their life would get a lot better.

Anonymous · Answer

im going to be alone forever for the following reasons:

im not good looking in the face

im overweight (although I'm hoping to achieve a good body by the time I'm 30)

i have impossibly high standards

i don't want to be married because the "love" will die and the wife will take all my money

i don't want to have kids because in this world, they will grow up RETARDED (although I really want to try being a dad)

so basically, the negatives outweigh the positivies..

thats all I can think of for now.

Anonymous · Answer

i don't think you could understand what feeling inadequate is like to a man; it's the most powerless and painful feeling you could possibly imagine. you feel weak, unworthy and beyond worthless.

these feels are only reinforced and when you go out there, chasing after girls you could imagine having something meaningful with, and you fail, the low selfesteem and hopelessness over your situation just gets worse

i found this site when my finance' cheated on me and our engagement broke off. I was in a mental hell for almost 2 years. I am finally out of it, but I still visit this site from time to time.

Bruce1987 · Answer

From my point of view I never really had much success with females, and I truly believe I have not been given a fair chance as well. I have always been told I am one of the good guys, but anytime I feel something for someone she wants nothing to do with me. I believe I am a good guy, I believe in being honest and straight forward with people. But at the end of the day I can't force someone to like me, it is something I can't control and always believed if it is meant to be then it was meant to be. And if I am meant to be alone then so be it, I can only play the cards I am dealt.

Myownhero · Answer

I think the quote from greys anatomy mostly sums up everything i believe in There's a reason I said I'd be happy alone. It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart, I might not make it. It's easier to be alone, because what if you learn that you need love and you don't have it? What if you like it and lean on it? What if you shape your life around it and then it falls apart? Can you even survive that kind of pain? Losing love is like organ damage. It's like dying. The only difference is death ends. This? It could go on forever.

randomocity · Answer

im a guy at 18 who doesn't choose to be alone I just accept the fact that I'm no good for anybody. I really over complicate things when it comes to relationships(I did have girlfriend but I over thought something simple and ended it then a few months I realized how wrong I was.) so I decided that I'm just no good for girls and I'm going to die alone. that was 4 years ago and even after moving from kansas to maine to wisconsin I still believe that all the girls in the world are just to good for me, so I gave up on it all. but this isn't a sob story, I just felt bored today so here you go.

alysaa16 · Answer

i honestly don't no at times I thought I would b and other times id b like of course not ill find someone but iv never dated someone and I don't no if anyones ever liked me I'm defininetely not giving ha no way but I honestly just don't no if anyone will like me a lot of my friends have more experience than me or are prettier blah blah blah and sometimes I feel like with people so such better personalities and prettier how would I ever find someone I would like to find someone though I guess I just haven't met them yet though

sadeyedwanderer · Answer

I have felt that way for a long time since I have a messed up penis due to a birth defect. But after talking to other guys who have the same condition as me and have caring girlfriends who look past it and care more about them as a person. I'm beggining to feel a glimmer of hope that maybe there is someone out there who will love me.

Symorg · Answer

You're absolutely right. Yes, at times I really feel that way because I refuse to compromise my values and convictions. I see so many people who act like mindless sheep, not because they are, I know better, they just find it much easier. It makes me feel like I won't find someone who shares my beliefs. I realize that there are plenty of people out there with the right stuff to stand for what they believe in but I can't seem to find them. Oh, well, keep looking I suppose.

SocietysBomb · Answer

well were born alone, we die alone.. but I'm sure ill have company along the way, I've have so far. most of us do, and sometimes we fail to realize it because its not always the company we crave. were so focused on what we don't have we forget to notice what we do have.

Anonymous · Answer

yes I kinda do. but I do wish I had a girlfriend to hold..because of how and what's happend in my past with females EVERY girlfriend  I have had that's eight have cheated on me or done something that really made me not trust girls any more(I know you need to get over it they say but its  extreamly hard to get over what's happend to me.  so in turn I have come up with soon I'm going to  in proble the next 1-2-3 years in going to      A).join the army and climb the ranks.  B).go in to law enfrocement and climb the ranks .  C). become a monk. or D). try and get over my past and trust girls again.   sadly I have been alone for the past 6 years so I'm OK with going out alone(dieing) I don't want  it to come to that. but doesn't mean I can't go out with a bang.

Anonymous · Answer

yes I always do the wrong thing and end up in the friend zone or creep them out and they hate me.

or I fall for the wrong girl.i am 42 only had 3 girl friend and the last one she left me my ,penis is to small about 5 inch.that is what she told me.talk about confidence killer.the first one I was 14 the second one I was18 and she also told me my penis was to small.the 3rd one I was 31 and I have been alone all that time. I have met girls but it never works out. I am sacred. the last one turned cold on me. I don't know why.she dose not want to tell my why.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't cry over being single. Due to the fact my parents have a bad relationship, my friends parents have bad relationships, and I've been in a bad relationship, I realize I do not have to be with someone. I prefer being single. I do not feel the need to date, or get married, or the desire to. And if so, I believe I can wait until the future to be in that kind of relationship. Besides, I much prefer having some close friends, to having a boyfriend, Etc. I don't NEED to be in a relationship of that kind, and I do not want to. I don't believe I CAN'T be in love with someone, or that I'll remain alone forever. I do not even consider it being alone. I am not alone at all. I have a few great friends, a lot of family, and I am happy. Where is the "Alone" in that?

ihatework · Answer

it is easy to think that way but it's most likely not too happen, unless you really make it that way.

trihonesty · Answer

I've always believed that I'd be alone forever.  All I ask of anyone is for honesty, loyalty and integrity but these days it's hard to find in a potential partner.  Even after a devastating breakup almost a year ago I still believe in love and monogamy.  I just think that I, as a person, hold very alternative and idealistic viewpoints and beliefs that may contradict with what everyone believes is a normal life/relationship/perspective.  In some ways my life tends to border on asceticism even though I try to be pragmatic and balance a life in society with my beliefs.  I don't know... it just seems to me like no girl would be interested in me even though I do have regular hobbies and interests like hiking, running, music, and movies.  But again, this isn't something I cry about.  As I still believe in love, I believe that eventually things will fall into place at some point.

TylerMMA · Answer

I honestly think I will be like 30 before I have something real. I guess that's what I get for getting a career right away instead of going to college and partying and being surrounded by girls. instead I work all the time and the girls here are gross.

Kadiboma · Answer

I try not to think that way, but it does cross my mind. I have the added horrible aspect of my biological clock ticking very loudly and still haven't met Mr Right. I hear that when a woman is over 30 men just see us as wanting babies and being 'desperate' (which I'm not,  because I'd have got with the first man who came near me if I was) and run a mile.  So I guess my answer is I HOPE I'm not alone forever, but it's not looking great!

Handyman7 · Answer

You are 100% right but as you get older it gets harder to find people to date that you want to date, and you start to wonder.  Then you have to decide if you should lower your standards to be with someone, or keep them high and maybe unrealistic, and risk being alone.

jarhead · Answer

It's also stupid to say you will be alone when you are only in your 20s. Unless you are a 28-30 year old virgin that has never had a girlfriend or something, just enjoy the ride. I didn't have sh*t going on until I was about 22 and got fed up with being a virgin and insecure. Don't worry too much unless you are getting really close to 30, then you will realize it may be getting hopeless and that you definitely need to make some major changes.

xohelperxo · Answer

Live in the moment that is the best advice.. you need to take every opportunity into account and go for it.. Live your life to fullest and don't hold back.. The future is scary place that I try to avoid honestly I live my life as I eat I do whatever makes me happy And a smile

I know I sound like some hallmark card by the way but living this way works.

Breeze138 · Answer

Part of me thinks I could possibly be alone forever...i'm 20 years old and I've never even kissed a girl...it seems like every time I meet a girl I'm automatically put into the friend zone...it sucks but I've come to the fact that I might be alone forever and it sucks but I'm kinda getting used to the fact that I've never had anyone like me more than a friend...i've been told that I'm a great guy on many occasions but never seems to make a difference and I'm not sure why, I think I may be hear on earth to be alone :-/

Leeni · Answer

No, I may not be with the same person forever in a husband-wife sense, but I know I'll probably never be alone. I will probably be in love many times in my life, and every time you change something in your life you become different, so one person isn't going to suit you for the rest of your life anyway. Atleast I don't think so.

Rated_R · Answer

"F" it yeah maybe don't really care anymore just worry about myself from now on. Until someone real comes along or whatever I guess been single for awhile but it makes me stronger. Ill just compensate a girlfriend relationship with a gym relationship and martial arts and become a asskicker and not a mindfuc*er like most girls I meet.

bradd · Answer

i will be alone I think one way or another because I don't "Let them in" I still don't know what that means, I include them and talk to them, but they still say no I don't date lots at once but my ex's said I still never let them in, my guard will always be up I guess is why I will always be alone too much being taken advantage of in the past now I don't trust anyone

lookingforinsight · Answer

Iv'e asked out over 200 girls and they've all said that famous word NO.  I've got offered sex with no strings and said no. saving for someone that I love.  will I die alone, I don't know but I am still looking and I ask myself this question all the time. I'm just going to keep talking and asking the girls out I mean I can't get rejected like 6 billion times right, in a row.

Asailum · Answer

People who talk about how they are "gonna be alone forever" are just feeling sorry for themselves and (whether they are aware of it or not) feeding off your sympathy. Sure we are all susceptible to being lonely but complaining about it to others is childish and stupid.

gummybear888 · Answer

I think the best approach to this is to just be positive and change things about yourself to improve.

I doubt I'd be lonely because I'm rather attractive and get attention from guys but I am selective about who I date. I'll probably get married when I'm 30, around there.

onfire4u · Answer

I'm not alone, but my fear is that I will be with this person who loves me dearly, but I don't return the same feeling.  It's really saddening when someone tells you day after day that they love you, but the only thing going through your mind is "How do I get out of this relationship without it looking like it was my fault?"  Pretty sad huh?  Maybe I should be alone...it would serve me right anyway.

Minxxe · Answer

i think that particular age group 14-24 really feel like the world evolves around them and their lives...maybe they need to get off the pc and go learn what we used to call people skills to actually meet people?!

u know, now that we don't all go to church every sunday.

dudeisthatu · Answer

Very true I don't think I will be alone for ever, I'm alone but it is by choice I choose to be single till I can find that one I connect with. I'm putting my self out there but in the same light I'm not out to play games. I'm looking for maturity stability fun out going person other wise I'm not sure if I could bother with the person to much.

Rubies_7 · Answer

I would love to not be alone, to find my lifelong mate. My problem is that I haven't yet, not even someone I could see that way...so its just the current actuality that is causing the fear about the future for me. I yearn for it to be different, that I can find that love and companionship, but the reality now is coloring my expectations bleak.

Hopefull83 · Answer

I've just been through a bad break up. I love this guy SO much that it's hard to imagine ever not loving him or loving someone other than him. So right now, I am scared that I'll be alone forever, not because I'm not smart or pretty or funny. I am a great catch, so that's not it. I just think I can't be with anyone that I am not in love with and right NOW, I think I might not love anyone else...

ShootingStar5 · Answer

Who knows. It depends on whether or not I find somebody who I want to spend the rest of my life with and if they want to spend theirs with me. Nobody can say for sure what's gonna happen. Unless you're psychic lol. I like to think that there's somebody out there for everybody though as long as YOU can commit yourself to a relationship.

ilovebeingnatural · Answer

I totally agree with you... thou I have the thought I'm going to be alone forever because I'm like really picky like if you've seen "what chilli wants" vh1 show that's me I have all these standards and guys aren't like that like everyone has their flaws and if I do find someone up to my standards either he lives far away or he doesn't like me =_= but I don't give up if I think that (ima be alone forever) something bad happened and I say that kinda like joking to myself but for me I think its going to be hard as hell to find someone I can spend my life with :)

IdontWantToBeMe · Answer

I agree with you I don't see why people cry a river over being alone and I'm not sure if I think I will be alone forever, I think I would rather be alone then not happy with someone else though.

I have a boyfriend at the moment and if we ever break up and I'm alone and no one else ever makes me happy I will be just fine

Musclecarman · Answer

Good question, For me personally, I think there is a decent possibility that I will lol. Not because I'm shy but more or less not caring either way. To the point of even blowing off girls who showed interest in me subtlety or not so subtlety (guess I'm not as ugly as I thought ROFL). Thing is I've spent my whole life single so I'm quite used to it actually. Not trying to have a pity party but that how I am.

xdesigns · Answer

In my opinion and experince that SELF is your worst enemy and is one of causes for loneliness. So occupy yourself to anything, it doesn't have to be a person.  I found it is far better to have any kind of companion be it a love relationship or friendship either physcially and remotely written communciation that keep you going.

Kickrockslosers · Answer

I'm incredibly picky and turn away men all the time.  I just want someone really special for me. Sometimes I do believe I will be alone forever and other times I believe I am closer than ever to finding the right man. At my age, I just know what works and doesn't work for me.  Every man is not the right one for me and I accept that.  What's acceptble for one person is not acceptable for another.  Also, one man's trash  is another man's treasure. Well, that's my opinion. KRL

255110 · Answer

I used to think that way back in Elementary School. Whenever I'd see a pretty girl, I'd think to myself- "damn she's too pretty for me, Ima go down a notch."  But I've realized that you should never belittle yourself. You should start appreciating yourself and you would feel more confident. And with confidence and some practice with charm in front of the mirror, Love happens :)

sfnh28 · Answer

maybe I will, maybe I wont

after I broke up with my ex that I had been with for 2 years and 4 months which was also my first longest relationship I have ever had, my mindset towards love just became negative. I met a few nice guys after that but I got either turned down or fooled by them.

therefore, I decided not to seek for love or guys for a while and focus on my study. it's like, I'm totally giving up on love and don't want to believe or have faith in it anymore.

basically, my answer is I don't know as sometimes I do feel like I will be alone forever and sometimes I do feel like I will meet my prince charming. but then, all of us are created as a pair by god :)

singitout22 · Answer

You know there are times in my life where I have said to myself that I guess I will just always be single. But is that real reality I am always about to pop back up and get back out there to give it another shot. As a guy that is what we want is to have a girl to care and love on. It might take time, but who would really rather be single than to have a girl that you could care for.

Sugashawtie · Answer

yes, I do believe I will be alone forever. because I got myself into a situation where I cannot let go of one person and I will not half-heartedly go into a relationship with some one else, I don't think that ould be fair on the other half of the relationship.

Marciano · Answer

lol, OK, you see, most guys and girls are naturally shy, and chatting someone up takes great effort for them, especially shy guys and when they fail a lot of times over and over, they just don't see any point and this builds rejection fear inside them. But they become tolarent to higher emotional abuse, and since they 'believe' rejection awaits them, they stop caring. That's what I think

ikarus · Answer

i don't think I will be alone forever but at times I do think I am not compatible with people. I'm very intense, and it tends to attract people, but that very intensity can be the reason the end up running for the hills. so, will I be alone forever? naaa...just probably for a good portion of my remaining days...

micricjac · Answer

it depends if you don't decide do do anything about it then you will but if you make more of an effort then youve got more chance

some of it can be on the area you live and what people are like

if you always do what you've always done , you'll alwasy get what you always got

brownchic · Answer

well you can't really tell its all on the destiny!

but a lot of people cheating betraying and loss of trust leads to this insecurity and fear of being alone...i know I was suffering from it when my ex dumped me...but then I always hope the grass is greener on the other side like you would never know where and when the oppurtunity knocks=)

stevo · Answer

Honestly? I don't know. But a lot of guys (and some girls) will just throw in the towel just based on bad experiences from the opposite gender . I certainly hope I don't-as my parents, as well as several others are pushing me to find the right gal and get married. And I hope to one of these days.

Do you honestly think you'll be alone forever and why? (Page 2)

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