I think I scared him away with my feelings - what should I do?

[Anonymous]

I ignored a guy for 2 days (I thought he wasn't interested in me at first). He kept sending me messages wondering if something had happened. When I reached out, he seemed worried he had done something wrong. I told him I had needed some space because I was afraid to get attached to him. This first made him sad - but when I said I thought I felt more for him than he did for me, he suddenly pulled back and hasn't contacted me. We've only met twice, but have been in contact for about 2 months.

What should I do? (This happened a few hours ago)

Call him and explain further (take the edge off it)

Wait for him to initiate contact

He probably isn't interested - move on

Send a lighthearted message wondering if I scared him away or something similar

Updates

+1 y

I sent him a message. He said I hadn't scared him off, but I had got him thinking. He agreed we should take things slow for now, but he said he still likes me a lot.

[Mr_Potatoman]

I would say that he needs some space for himself, you probably surprised him with your confession. Give him some time. If he doesn't respond anything for a week only then I would go with a light-hearted message asking him is everything ok and that you haven't heard hrom him for a while.

I personally believe he will contact you and that he pulled back to do some recap because he didn't expect that confession from you.
Most guys don't expect that kind of a message from a girl (but I also believe that most do appreciate it).

If you stopped talking to him for two days he probably thought to himself that you don't like him (I know I would think that).

In conclusion, I think it's good that you confessed, now just give him time to process.

[coachTanthony]

-----------------------Having strong feelings for someone after only meeting twice is a red flag. So I would wait to see if he initiates contact because at this point you can't say you were just joking.

I would wait. If he contacts you then don't bring up all that stuff just move forward... don't be a dead horse.

[coachTanthony]

*beat a dead horse*

[Rrood03]

I’m in a long term relationship and we still have this issue. My boyfriend is afraid to have too deep of feelings for me so he pulls away often. He was hurt in the past and doesn’t allow himself to love me because he doesn’t want to be hurt again. It does hurt my feelings when this happens because I hadn’t done anything wrong and i feel as though I’m the issue when in reality it’s just him working through his feelings. The best way to settle these uncomfortable moments is just by being honest and open. After he’s ready to talk again, we often work it out and understand one another. Communication is always the best answer.

[Paris13]

Call him and Talk Things Out.. See where you Stand. Stop Overthinking things, Let it Flow. xx

[SuperManiac]

My thinking in these contexts is that the safest strategy is to "be attractive", whatever that means in this scenario. I tend to think, more often than not, that would be light, appealing, not heavy and dramatic. It might be heavy and dramatic in some cases, but in my experience, it's more at risk of being unattractive and scaring people away.

[Davidstang]

you needing space after only seeing him 2 times because you think your falling for him makes you sound a bit crazy. there is nothing you can do. either he is going to get past it or he has already decided to move on.

[Nakoma]

I say wait for him to contact you. He had no issues contacting you before you expressed to him how you felt, and now he is. Guys go after what they want. If he wants you, he will pursue you.

[Pipeliner87]

Sorry girl, you lack experience and as a result he's put his eggs in another basket. He got the just of things. You are an emotional wreak and are a slave to your emotions. He does not want a woman who's a nut case with her emotions.

[LoU_Hades]

You said him between the lines " I don't want you and you don't like me ". I don't think he will contact you ever again.

[_food_lover234]

definetly wait for him to iniate, if he has any interest in you, he will reach out

[james2018dean]

You sent him conflicting messages. He might think you're nutty.

[p_nut]

You might have tanked it. If you need space because you're afraid of attachment, are you sure you're up for dating?

[DefinetlyAGuy]

Well, he is giving you space, ya know. If you want, contact him and explain what happened.

[Liam_Hayden]

Why do people play games like this? Just be straight up and say, "I think you are interesting. Let's get to know each other."

[Anonymous]

I don't know girly. Just be upfront. Say where do you see us in a year?

[serious]

You need to contact him and explain to him.

[Thatsamazing]

... This is ridiculous.