I think I scared him and now he's pulling away?

[Anonymous]

I think I worried this guy I like and now he's pulling away because he felt pressured or felt things were moving too fast. What do I do?

The energy definitely has shifted and its such a sucky feeling. I like him and enjoy getting to know him and he felt I was moving too fast or wanted way more but really I just like hanging out with him and want to take my time on developing something genuine. Help.

[Bigbuck1992]

Maybe he wants to take you seriously but scared because he probably moved fast in the past and it ended in disaster. I wouldn’t be afraid of expressing your feels with a possible rejection. Rejection hurts but is apart of life. Just give him time and space to process everything. I believe right now he’s going back and fourth in his head about what he wants. If you want to continue hooking up then do so. It’s fun and a good stress reliever but if it’s you guys are not going anywhere and you’re looking for a relationship and he’s not, then that would have to end too at one point or another so you can find someone else. It your choice on what you want to do though but don’t be anxious even though I know it’s hard for you. Good luck.

[boggboss]

How do u feel things where moving too fast

[Asker]

I think I misread the situation and expressed my feelings too soon. I feel like with that, he realized that we were both moving way faster than we realized.

[boggboss]

With the exception of him not being intrested in somthing serious from the start I don't feel u showing feelings would make him stop if he liked u

[Asker]

He's never expressed or mentioned that he didn't want something serious. I think he does but wanted to take his time on it and so do I. Since I've made my intentions clear, he would agree that he wasn't trying to waste my time or make it seem like we were only just hooking up. His intentions weren't that and we've continued to hang out, cuddle, and all that cute stuff.

He's been saying that he's been "working on it" as in trying to work on us hanging out more and going on dates and doing activities. He also is super busy with the type of work he does.

[boggboss]

Fair enough just to be clear tho how do u know its because u scared him tho

[Asker]

The energy shifted and we're barely talking now. He's said word for word: "just a little worried but its all good haha"

and also said "No I've been transparent. Just working on things. I just don't know if a relationship is in my near future or not just so you know. I'm happy just hanging out"

Also said: "Just being honest. I feel like you want way more way fast at this point in time and I don't want to hold you back" and I told him that it wasn't my intention to worry him or make him feel rushed. I really want to take my time on something like this and he said he understood it wasn't my intention to make him feel that way, he said "Its all good. Just was a lot at once"

[boggboss]

Oh I see but if he has now made that clear the space he is making is the speed at which he wanted no?

[Asker]

I guess so. He's pretty vague but has made known his intentions weren't to just hook up. I think he just has some work things going on and me expressing my feelings was also a lot to process. He's kept repeating that it was a lot at once.