Will he come back?

[Anonymous]

I've been sexually involved with this guy for almost 2 years. It started out casual and harmless but over the past 3 months we’ve been together all the time. He has a lot of commitment issues but one thing I want to mention is he’s also been involved with another woman which has rubbed me the wrong way obviously. He told me she was a bad person and is toxic and constantly hits him etc. He cut her off and she started harassing him and making threats towards him. Just last week he told me he wanted to be with me and only me and slowly work out way into a real relationship. He told me he loved me for the first time a few weeks ago and has said it almost every day since when we see each other. Last week we spent everyday together. When we were with his friends he introduced me as his girl. He was extremely clingy. Then a couple days ago it’s like he vanished. We never go a day without texting and it became 4 days of no contact. I then find out he was messaging that other woman saying he misses her and wanted her to “hangout at his place”. I sent him a text confronting him and he hasn’t replied and is ignoring me. I’ve helped him through so much for the past year and I can't imagine someone is capable of dropping someone so easily like that after all we’ve been through together. He deleted me from all social media. Do you think he will eventually come back? He was literally saying he loved me 5 days ago and wanted to be with me...

[divspppp]

Yeah, I don’t think he will come back. Make sure to move on, and even if he does decide to come back, cut him off immediately. You should never get into a relationship with a guy who has commitment issues because he will screw u over repeatedly. Trust me. Whenever u feel like you’re getting mixed signals from a guy, you should drop him immediately because if a guy truly loves you, you would know it and not be confused like u r right now. You wouldn’t be asking this question in the first place if he truly loved you. The fact that he was involved with another woman in the first place shows he never really loved or cared for u. The best thing to do is just to move on at this point. If he does come back tho, I cannot stress this enough, but DO NOT TAKE HIM BACK. This is for YOUR OWN GOOD. PEOPLE DON’T CHANGE.

[Asker]

Exactly. It just sucks because I actually was loyal to the idea of him (which was stupid of me obviously cause we weren’t officially dating) but I had so much hope due to how deeply he led me on. All my friends witnessed him around me and how clingy he was and it’s just baffling that he could do this to me. The other girl has messaged me saying he’s trying to get with her again and that she’s not stupid but I also don’t trust her. I feel she just messages me to get information. She probably is with him. But I gave this man everything. I even helped him with his rent and I’m 20 and he’s 27... so something must be wrong with him if he feels ok with using a young girl. But I was naive and did it out of love. I want him to come back just for the satisfaction that I meant something to him and he feels guilt but I would never take him back.

[Asker]

I know I can do better but it’s just the anger I have built up that he got away with doing me so dirty and he has a backup girl to be with where as I have nobody cause I wasn’t a asshole and I only invested in him.

[MzAsh]

Sounds like BPD. Looks like she’s not the only one who is toxic. You’re better off without him.

[Chris200]

Sounds like he was playing both of you and is with her now. This is a situation to let go , appreciate the good time and move on because he not worth it