My boyfriend isn’t speaking to me and I don't know why?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I haven’t been on the best of terms but these past two days he hasn’t text or called me
at all , he’s been leaving me on read when we have talked. He texts me every morning to say good morning but he hasn’t for two days. I want to say something so bad but I feel like I should ignore this feeling until he contacts me. I don't know what to do.

[chloeolivia]

The silent treatment is emotional abuse. If he won’t communicate why he’s upset, communicate that he’s having a tough time communicating and apologize to you for that, and if he won’t tell you that he needs a couple days to process things before his going silent, these are all very poor behaviors and you don’t deserve this kind of stress. Even if you *did* do something, hypothetically speaking, you don’t deserve this type of stress/treatment. I tell anyone on this site to educate themselves in narcissistic personality disorder and become acquaints with different types of psychological/emotional types of abuse and manipulation. Narc tok is a great resource (on TikTok.) Just throwing that out there just in case because I don’t want anyone to ever go through what I went through. But yeah. I hope any of that helps. Take care of yourself and seek therapy and help if this situation has been especially taxing for you mentally (in the form of confusion) and emotionally.

[Siren777]

Give him space. However don't wait too long. He shouldn't be ghosting you, he is your boyfriend after all. I wouldn't wait longer than 3days. Then contact, if still nothing. Try calling if still nothing. You know where you stand.

[NobleFlight]

Maybe reach out and ask him in person (if you can) why he’s ignoring you? If you can’t, text him? If he ignores your question something most likely wrong.

[Asker]

He said it’s been tough for him last time I spoke to him but he isn’t expressing what , usually he’s open with me and would tell me but I don't know. I’m leaving for south soon I’m thinking he’s detaching

[Asker]

I want to ask but I want to give him the space as well to come to me

[NobleFlight]

If you don’t ask at all, you may miss your chance. Give some space, but be sure to ask eventually or you’ll be curious even if he’s gone.

[Asker]

Yea I’m going to reach out although he usually is the one who reaches out to me

[NobleFlight]

Okay, good luck then.

[Asker]

I reached out

[NobleFlight]

And how’d it go?

[slatyb]

Tell him that you need a reply or you are going to assume it's over.

[chloeolivia]

Agreed. This is important. Also become educated in the concept of “trauma bonds” if you find even the idea of having to leave him particularly difficult or emotionally taxing

[spartan55]

You really have 'no idea' why? I find that very difficult to believe.

[Asker]

& idgaf what you think ! If I’m here asking the question clearly it means what it says if you aren’t here to express an opinion rather than blame me then you can go, it’s really that simple

[Asker]

Yea your 50 year old mizzy self can go

[spartan55]

Yeah, hard to see why he isn't speaking to you. I'm sure you didn't do anything honey.

[spartan55]

And now the pink anon starts talking shit... what a surprise. I'm right here, coward...

[spartan55]

Something obviously happened to make him do this, you just don't want to say what it is...
So how are any of us supposed to know what's going on when you give no information aside from "poor me, my boyfriend won't talk to me?"

[spartan55]

I don't even know wtf a mizzy is, but I'll add it to list of derogatory terms I've been called. 😂

[Asker]

You came here talking *ish & mizzy is short for MISERABLE ! Like I said I didn’t do anything to him , I’m here asking a question of what it could be from another perspective, there’s not much detail to provide and it isn’t a “poor me” situation

[spartan55]

I don't why you chose 'miserable', but whatever makes you feel better.
I didn't say you did anything to him, did I? You said you two hadn't been doing well recently. What was that centered around?

[Asker]

It was centered around him not being in a good position and me helping him to get back to that position. U didn’t have to be rude about anything... I’m simply trying to get a perspective on why he’s not speaking to me and leaving me on read , when I’m the only one who is always there but maybe someone else is fulfilling that now

[spartan55]

Okay, why do you women always default to "it must be someone else"? It's like guaranteed the first thing you think when things go south.
What does him 'not being in a good position' mean? How and why are you helping him get to that state?

[Asker]

Because that’s usually what it is, but I don’t think so, I think he may be going through more than he’s telling me. I reached out and he said he will call & explain to me tmw

[spartan55]

Okay, wait for his call tomorrow and see what he says.

[spartan55]

And no, it's what you usually THINK it is, not what it actually is. There is a difference.

[chloeolivia]

Don’t listen to Spartan. They sound like a toxic person so that’s why they’re unable to detect toxic type of behavior, or any type of behavior for that matter.

[spartan55]

@chloeolivia
Yeah, just use a couple buzzwords, and I can't detect 'any kind of behavior'. Nice try.