TOXIC boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

I think my boyfriend is super toxic but I feel like he will get better, my boyfriend called my ex-best friend that's a male to see if he was at my house a few days ago because he "heard" a man's voice in my room. i told him nobody was there, he was mad and yelling on the phone. i showed him every room in the house nobody was there. after a couple of days my ex-best friend told me he called him asking was he there.(obviously not) I texted him to apologize to him today and he did. i told him don't do that again, because I felt embarrassed about it, I told him to block my ex-best friend number it makes no sense to have it. he told "no" I was wondering why he didn't believe me that we wasn't talking to each other. my ex-best friend only talks to me went my boyfriend does something to him.(yes, my ex-best friend does respect our boundaries) my boyfriend told me "you need to respect me more" and "I have the pants in this relationship" also "I'm going to call you tomorrow so you can think about what you done, you are lucky to have me no guy will treat you as good as I do".

Toxic

He have a reason to feel that way

Updates

+1 y

I do want to stay and help him but he isn't mentally there and won't give up another person number for our relationship.

Updates

+1 y

I don't want to leave, but he have been getting better ish. he would say every know and than he hears ghost in his room or a knock at his door, and go check it out.

[relaxedmale]

Yeah, He is an insecure boy. Ask yourself do you want this type of chaos in your life? IF so then stay with him. if not and you don't care to walk on eggshells because you might upset him then pack his stuff up and when he comes to your door hand it to him and tell him goodbye.
By doing this you are also helping him be better. You are
A) not reinforcing negative and unacceptable behavior. Yeah, it is emotionally upsetting for you but those are just emotions they do not hurt you they just feel unpleasant.
B) You are setting up a healthy boundary for yourself.

[MrLizard]

He is not toxic.

He just loves and he is scared to lose you

[Asker]

But why does he have my ex-best friend number what's the point?

[MrLizard]

Because he is scared to lose you with him

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

He is extremely toxic and controlling, I highly suggest you leave him.
He won’t get better, by the way

[Asker]

We are both 18 and been together for 9months but I feel like if he grows up he can change

[Asker]

The only reason why he said "he have the pants " was because his dad called him a pussy.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

He’s not going to change if you don’t stand up for yourself.
Even if you do stand up for yourself, it’s unlikely he will respect you.
Again, I highly suggest you leave him before it gets worse.

[Asker]

Are you sure he has isn't just protective

[Asker]

He was never like this until this situation happen

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

He’s controlling.

[Asker]

Am wondering why he won't block my ex-best friend if they aren't talking.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I don’t know. Have your ex best friend block him.

[Asker]

Like he told me he isn't blocking his number. i told him to delete his number or we are done he said "if that's what you wanna do"

[Asker]

He did than he unblocked him I don't know why

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I don’t know, it doesn’t seem like a healthy relationship and I gave you advice to leave him before he gets too controlling. He doesn’t respect you.

[Asker]

Ok I think we are done, thanks I think I will tell me after he gets off work

[Asker]

I texted him that we was done, he is at work but maybe he will change he's ways after seeing that.

[MrLizard]

He is not controlling. He is very protective

[Asker]

@MrLizard why does he have his number and saying he is a saint compared to other guys which he isn't. he is kinda the same, he have bad anger issues and gets mad really fast, but never hit me.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

@MrLizard Look at what she’s saying lol, that is not just “oh he’s protective, he cares about her.” He’s controlling and an asshole and doesn’t respect her.

[MrLizard]

If it doesn't hit you that's good. That proves that you love each other very well and this is beautifull.

If he is angry, it may just be his personnality don't worry

[MrLizard]

I know he seems angry. But it is probably because of his father.

This man isn't bad or evil or something...

He just needs help and attention. He just has some small mental issues.

But trust me he does actually love her 100%

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

@MrLizard It’s not an excuse to treat a girlfriend like crap. He should get help instead of letting it out on her.

[Asker]

Let me make it clear my ex-best wasn't in my room he was at his house. my boyfriend heard a man's voice he so thought he head. i told him nobody was at my house at all. he called my ex-best friend as soon as he heard the "voice". he wouldn't let me talk and would even talk over me to finish his sentence. after I showed him nobody was there he didn't apologize to my ex-best friend that night which is childish and have trust issues to me that he need to work on. Today at school my ex-best friend told me what happened. than went I was on. The bus he sounded like he didn't care. i told him not to do that no more all he said was "ok". he didn't want to give up my ex-best friend phone number. he even told me"he won't even if we broke up".

[MrLizard]

You are right. As i said, he needs to get help faster. His father had bulied him since his chilhood and this is sad.

But this is not an excuse to show respect to the person you love i agree with you in that point.

We should met him in real life. What do you think?

[Asker]

We want to meet really badly after I finish collage. i I don't know if that will happen nw

[MrLizard]

I think your boyfriend is schizophrenic. 🤨

Because he heard a voice in your room while there was nobody there.

You should help him to get a therapy if you love him

[Asker]

He have a therapist at his school, and I would help him but I have no money at the moment. he works and I been told him he needs help, but he said he doesn't have time. he have money to do it, but seems like he doesn't want to.

[MrLizard]

You should have mentionned that earlier...

DON'T LEAVE HIM. He doesn't know what he is doing because he is mentally ill.

[Asker]

He is 18, and I feel unsafe that he isn't mentally stable. he probably won't stop

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

@MrLizard You just want her to get hurt… Seriously? If someone is mentally ill and abusive, the other person needs to leave for their own safety.

[Asker]

He isn't abusive but I just don't feel safe being around someone who have that problem. i will always love him but he doesn't want his dad to keep calling him a pussy and a bitch that he isn't man up and put his foot down at times.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

If he yells at you, controls you, manipulates you, that is considered abusive.
I know you love him, but you say it yourself, you don’t feel safe being around someone like that…

[MrLizard]

When you truly love someone, you naturally feel the need to stand up with this person even if she is mentally ill. I know it can be dangerous if he is violent but just don't get to close.

But if she doesn't love him she can leave him. It's her choice. Why staying with someone you don't love?

[Asker]

He give am a promise ring for my 18 birthday, he was never like his until I told him I had a guy best friend.

[MrLizard]

Just to make it clear :

Mentally ill person doesn' t mean that the person is evil, bad or demonic.

It's just a person with a soul but this person needs help to get their personnality back again.

An evil person doesn't have soul or empathy

[MysteriousDarkness]

@MrLizard
She doesn't feel safe around him so why should she stay with him?

[lrina]

it's best if you two go your separate ways...

[bamesjond0069]

you're hanging out with your exbf as a friend? Wtf. Id have never even started with you thats a deal breaker.

[Asker]

I wasn't with hanging with him he told me because of what my boyfriend did

[bamesjond0069]

Well it sounds like you did nothing. But i just wonder what his side of the story would sound like.

[Anonymous]

Like he said he has the pants so you have to obey him

[Chloe69306930]

toxic guys make hot boyfriends. But not good husbands

[SnakeBoop]

RUN GIRL RUNNNN

[EmmaStoner]

Toxic as fuck. Stay away from him