Why would a guy who was obsessive over me leave after I opened up to him?

[anonbrunette99]

[TonyV]

Well what did you open up to them?

Extreme example but let's say a girl I liked but didn't know well yet "opens up" about being one of those dog freaks, likes to be walked on a leash in public, eats out of a dog bowl on the floor, sleeps in a kennel.

Point is its hard to say if we don't what you opened up about, so if you aren't comforable telling us that part of the story how can we really help or say?

[anonbrunette99]

He told me the first time I meant him about his autism, depression, mental hospital stay, his medical condition his dads death and other stuff. i eventually open up to him after him chasing me and at times being over baring; about my toxic parents, how hard college was getting and about a suicide attempt when I was 17, I’m almost 22 now. he completely went ghost. I told him I’d never do it again and I’ve grew so much and I’m proud of the progress I made mentally but I guess that spooked him.

[TonyV]

Qell Whitaker your parents toxic? And whyd you attempt at 17?

[TonyV]

What makes your parents toxic?
Also how did his dad die?

[Crafteroon]

Seems like he was going for a superficial connection, or just wasn't ready for one as deep as you opening up required.

Doesn't mean you shouldn't open up, opening up is a good way to find out about true intentions.

[anonbrunette99]

I learned a lesson though, in my head I kind of thought his interest in me was superficial he would just always seem to not accept it in his head that I didn’t want to date him, so it was like he wanted to be my friend to make me change my mind. Prob realised that friendship required to much effort with little return (as in he’s probably not going to be my boyfriend)

[Crafteroon]

You can never be sure that was the case but seems like it based on his behavior.

[Anonymous]

This is too vague to answer. We weren't there and didn't hear the conversation or know any details about anything with the two of you. Maybe he felt you wanted some space? Only he can tell you though. Ask him.

[jshm2]

Probably realised you've got more problems than him

[anonbrunette99]

Is this a reason to leave? I have had people with more problems in my life I tried to help them and be there for them

[Fukaroo]

Who knows maybe he didn't like the man behind the mask.

[anonbrunette99]

Then he didn’t love me the way he said repeatedly or he would’ve accepted it

[Fukaroo]

Correct

[kinggeorge007]

Maybe something you said spooked him. Maybe you have dated someone he knows in the past. It depends on what you've told him.

[Creampiekarl420]

Because like most women you probably rely more on your looks than personality when it comes to dating which will only get you a guy not keep him

[PerfectDark_Joe]

Maybe you said something that made him uncomfortable?

[anonbrunette99]

opened up to him about my depression? just seems he obviously was only so into me for superficial reasons. he used to write poems about me and ask and ask to even have me as a friend then bomb. I tell him about my depression, self harm 4 years ago and he’s gone. I guess opening up is bad.

[PerfectDark_Joe]

I don't think its bad to open up to people.
However, I do think you were right that its likely he was into you for the wrong reasons.

[anonbrunette99]

It’s a lesson I Should just see it as hey maybe I dodged a bullet cause if he could leave over that he was probably gonna leave soon anyways at some point

[PerfectDark_Joe]

That is a great way of thinking about the situation.

[Guardian45]

I hate to repeat this. LOSE THE LOSERS! STOP chasing guys who CAN'T stay out of prison!

[Anonymous]

That's why women generally don't open up easily and early with men and let men chase them for a long time before they open up to him

[Stevefiveo]

Hmm, maybe you said scared him away.

[TallAnon]

Seems like he wasn't in for something deep

[Anonymous]

What did you tell him?

[flirtatiousgirl]

You should say him like that your ego is my Lego