Why don't men believe in traditional gender roles nowadays?

Question

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Radical Feminism, starting in the 60s, made it their mission to convince women to reject being traditional women, and to withhold all benefits that men used to receive when they were traditional men and were providing for their wives.

Here are some quotes from major Feminist leaders:

Betty Friedan wrote, “women who ‘adjust’ as housewives, who grow up wanting to be ‘just a housewife,’ are in as much danger as the millions who walked to their own death in the concentration camps… they are suffering a slow death of mind and spirit.”
Linda Gordon said, “the nuclear family must be destroyed… Whatever its ultimate meaning, the break-up of families now is an objectively revolutionary process.”
Robin Morgan said “We can’t destroy the inequities between men and women until we destroy marriage.”
Mary Jo Bane said, “in order to raise children with equality, we must take them away from families and communally raise them.”
Vivian Gornick said, “being a housewife is an illegitimate profession… The choice to serve and be protected and plan towards being a family maker is a choice that shouldn’t be. The heart of radical feminism is to change that.”
Helen Sullinger said, “We must work to destroy [marriage]… The end of the institution of marriage is a necessary condition for the liberation of women. Therefore it is important for us to encourage women to leave their husbands and not to live individually with men… All of history must be rewritten in terms of oppression of women.”

Today, and for several decades already, most (not all!) women want to be "modern women", with all of the privileges and benefits of modern women, but they want men to be traditional, so that those men continue to provide them with all of the benefits that traditional women used to get. In other words, they want all the best parts of both systems with none of the responsibilities of either.

Men have woken up to the reality of this. The majority of women - some 80% - only consider the top 10% of men for relationships, and even then, they initiate divorce 77% of the time (90% of the time for college graduates), and the divorce rate is approaching 60%. As such, a lot of men have simply walked away from the game - they're no longer interested in offering relationships to women where the expectations on men are so high and the benefits of the relationship for men are so low. Some of these men will still pursue women for casual sex (but nothing more), and many others don't pursue women at all. And since they have resigned themselves to being single, there's less need for them to work themselves to death as they did in the past to provide (I think some men have taken that too far, and become downright lazy, but this is where it started).

Meanwhile, the top 10% of men all have dozens or hundreds of women throwing themselves at him. As such, he has no reason to commit to any of them - he'll use them for sex and companionship until she becomes too much of a hassle, and then he'll get a new one. And even when he's well-known for doing this, there's still a never-ending supply of women stepping up to have a turn.

Make no mistake: these changes are the result of Feminism. Anytime someone tells you that you can change a major component of a complex system and that nothing else will change (such as: women changing from traditional to modern, but the rest of the system will remain traditional so that she can gain benefits without losing anything) is lying to you - EVERYTHING has a trade-off, and balance will always be restored.

Women traded husbands and children and being provided for in order to have careers - to work outside the home for 40 years of their lives.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Accepted Answer

I hate being tied down by tradition. I set my own way and decide what role I play, not dead men from the past.

demonics · Answer

I'm told they get free sex without the commitment in modern times. I mean imagine having to court a woman for months! And be responsible and and actually listen to her problems, and get along with her family, and bring something to the relationship besides dick and attention... pfff eff that! And women don't know how to deal with it. Be a hoe, because thats what feminism tells them, and ignore all of the negative consequences of that lifestyle but, also have to go work, and live in a mans world where people chew you up and spit you out. No one really likes you for you, you're just a butt and eye lashes. No one calls you back, you get no snuggles, you get no security, you gotta kill your own spiders. Only when women reach the age of say 50 do they realize they've been duped. Duped into being wage slaves like everyone else. And that hot girl summer all those years back? Yea, you've been on Rx drugs ever since. Almost like women aren't meant to have random hookups...

Remember kids, this is what you wanted. https://nypost.com/2022/01/30/fatal-nyc-jumper-identified-as-miss-usa-2019-cheslie-kryst/

motownplayer2000 · Answer

Because it doesn’t help people grow. Gender roles should be setup when two “genders” come together. Whatever works in there dynamic is how it should be. If you are single, you aren’t doing gender roles. You are doing what humans should do. Survive and take care of there responsibilities. It’s just funny to me that people still think that “the way it was were the best ways…” a lot of arguments come out where people said that women were treated with more respect back in the day and people were kinder to each other, etc.. I disagree. Women were thought of as less than. Couldn’t take care of themselves, needed to depend on a man, if he was abusive, she didn’t have anywhere to go. Because she was so dependent on him. And more so shamed for not taking care of the house “like a woman should…”

Racism, discrimination and segregation was more prevalent back in this traditional times. There is a lot to learn when it comes to “traditional gender roles..” and most of it is what not to do.

Oigit · Answer

I don't want to be responsible for anyone but myself. So a relationship based on gender roles isn't going to work. The same goes for having kids. Since some peoples views traditional gender roles does means having kids, it's another reason why I'm not for it.

That and I have a pretty damn pronounced independent streak. So relationships can be hard for me to navigate in general. Because there is always a voice in my head telling me that I need to move on before I end up getting pinned in place. That voice can get really loud too and the only way to shut it up is to pick up and leave. So there have been times where I got a new job in a different city or state and left where I was at.

Though I'm upfront and honest about this. I'm not going to chance a girl thinking that a serious relationship is in the cards and I'm going to stay in one place to build a future with them.

razelove · Answer

You have that ass backwards, whether men believe in them or not, the power to exercise them is gone by and large. I'm at home with the kids and have been for a while because my wife made a unilateral decision to move/stay in this state where I have no job opportunities in my career. When I left for contract work she started threatening divorce within about 2 months. I can make the money for her to be a housewife. "She just can't handle it" I guess I'm magical then.

Anyway, I'm looking for contract work again because I'm getting rusty and don't want my degree to become useless, if you bend too far in anything you break. Women have far more control in relationships, especially if you have kids, as a guy what you may want or believe is kind of useless unless you're willing to risk divorce over it.

Guy13 · Answer

Because we are fallen sinners obliged by lusts of the Flesh rather than the Intelligent Design our Creator and Designer gave us. —No one likes to sit under Absolute Truth. Sex, Gender, and All things are given by our Creator, absolutely. The world is simply raising and shaking its collective ✊🏾✊🏼✊fist at God in defiance…little kids throwing sand in sand box.
—It’s too difficult and America is under judgment given over to its sinfulness. Don’t expect it to improve until global implosion with Biden leading the Show.

EyeKnowMeNahYou · Answer

Because traditions are made every day and if you depend on men to do and work by societal traditions then you also have to give account for many ethnicities cultures and certain Dynamics and geographic rearing plus growth from adolescence to adulthood.

Also Imagine the traditional gender role being something that also is placed upon you as a woman meaning nothing more than housework and child rearing does that sound quaint. Honestly everybody is doing everything by the gender roles and since in the roles are starting to become much more open next thing you know it'll be men cooking then again they do that now or maybe it'll be men for homemakers, well that's rare. So in other words what really is a traditional gender role if you're tradition is in my tradition, where are you basing the standard at?

ThrowAwayx404 · Answer

Is this a joke? 😂 Because it’s funny AF. Men don’t believe in gender roles? LOL! That’s news to me. I’m a man and I can tell you that majority of men do believe in gender roles. I think the rigidity of those roles has softened but most men still believe in gender roles.

It’s women who don’t believe in gender roles anymore. You can thank feminism for that.

Men have simply adjusted to the new reality of what it’s like dealing with women in 2022, where they don’t want to do anything, want everything handed to them, and expect men to basically be slaves in the relationship. From the a woman’s point of view, it may appear that men don’t believe in gender roles, but it’s not that. It’s more that women have decided that they don’t need to bring anything to the relationships, all while still holding on to those traditional expectations for men.

If you’re a man in 2022, you’re basically signing up for slavery, not a mutually beneficial relationship.

Wraith_Cemetery · Answer

I'm a traditionalist and believe in gender roles. There's nothing wrong with them as long as both parties are in agreement. Then again, I'm very old school, dress like I belong in the past, and cannot stand modern culture. Not many guys like myself around these days.

LazerBean · Answer

Poor guidance, and lack of self control. Traditional men with conservative values get traditional wives. Men who want traditional women but don't themselves want to be traditional tend to sleep around, rendering themselves undesirable to trade women who them avoid them. Then those guys decide that since they can't find a trade woman (because they are all avoiding them) that there must not be any anymore.

Adam1978 · Answer

Because we have machines that does most of that work now. So until there is kids involved there is no need for traditional roles. It's also society that has changed you can no longer support a family and please a wifes expectations on an average salary.

Kaneki05 · Answer

Many still do, and many countries still do. When you look at such countries though that do you would have a super hard time finding any reason gender roles are a good thing and only realise there used to be sexist and controlling.

So that's why the more civilised and progressive society's are weeding it out of our mindset.

Sixgunsound · Answer

Couple things to unpack here; first of all men don’t believe anything. Individual men do individual men don’t but as a unit man don’t believe anything. Now that that’s out of the way, let me personally guarantee that there are men out there with traditional values. As in most things, women set the standard, and men rise to the level of expectations. What I’m getting at here is if you want a traditional man, be a traditional woman. Otherwise it’s a hypocritical double standard.

SimpleGuy95 · Answer

Because of the way we´re raised plus because it would give us more responsibility than we´re used to having.
In a traditional relationship guys have all the responsibility many guys come from a world where responsibility is split so it sounds also a bit intimadating.
There are still some guys that would welcome that but many of them only because they never lived in such a constellation.

Cherry234 · Answer

Because they're outdated and some men and women don't want to adhere to them. Some are even harmful to people and ridiculous like the belief that men shouldn't cry or women are expected to be dainty and docile. This isn't the 1950's anymore. We're living in the 21st century.

Ekvark · Answer

I think it's because nobody else does anymore. Not many anyway, and it's not a good or bad thing in my opinion. It just is. People are gonna do what they want. Now more than ever. Again that's fine either way, but nobody should be confused at why this is now.

Chiarac2003 · Answer

Everyone is different… I wanna cook n clean etc… it’s best if I do anyway!😂😂but I work too… but am happy to b closer to the way it used 2b. If u can bear with my schedule I’ll b happy to serve dinner.

TallAnon · Answer

Because we didn't grow up with them we're not used to them and thus we don't exercise them.
Nowadays it makes no sense to have a woman sit at home and do nothing. Once you get kids it could make sense for a while, but otherwise there's no excuse for her to lazy around. I work and live on my own right now and that works out, don't need to add a leech.

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Because men like me who are happy with them are stigmatised by feminazis. We are criminalised for being a man. Most women want a strong dominating assertive man, but if you engage with the wrong woman, it’s off the job, out of the club, and maybe even into the pokey with possible huge looming fines.

So our children who are watching this travesty unfold, are learning it’s much more advantageous to be in a woman’s role. And our boys are picking the most beneficial choice.

Liliesxoxo · Answer

Most of us aren't waiting till marriage anymore and sadly are playing a role in this messed up ''hooking up'' culture. That ends up happening is that now, more men can get free sex, meals and everything without ever making a commitment. More women are falling into the ''forever girlfriend'' category, which is really no different from a friend with benefits.
More men are being careful with giving out commitment and ironically less women are giving careful with giving out sex.

NathanDavis · Answer

because 1950... was 70 years ago the same way in which people do no longer believe that smoking is good for you either, or harmless... for that matter

Slartybartfast · Answer

Women have choices while men are still stuck in the same roles we always have. Work, military or prison.  No rights to our children, no rights to our bodies we are the disposable sex.

alice55 · Answer

Neither does the majority of women. I think it's surely cause they have been raised by "leftist" and not traditional parents.

Intothevoid666 · Answer

Because In a highly developed society physical size is far less relevant and so it gives women the opportunity to behave in a more masculine way if they so choose and men a more feminine way. R u saying u want traditional gender roles?

DryGermanGuy · Answer

Some of us still do!

one1wild00 · Answer

Well , it seemed to start around the same time as Women's right to vote and women's lib movement and has been slowly digressing from there. not with the economy as it is there almost has to be two income to survive.

AviatorTom · Answer

Women's Lib and Feminism has made it hard for men to even think about traditional gender roles without getting yelled at.

slatyb · Answer

What do you mean by that? Why don't more men want a marriage where the woman does not work outside the home?

WhitneySnow · Answer

Most people of all genders don’t believe in traditional gender roles these days.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm pretty sure it wasn't men who made traditional gender roles go away.

genericname85 · Answer

men do. it's women who don't. it's women who want all special rights in order to "escape" their so called "oppressive" gender role.

Iron_Man · Answer

I do I follow the Bible I believe women should be subservient and aim to please and they also will be rewarded by kindness and a free roof over her head which I already paid the house off

Anonymous · Answer

Because we can't find women who believe in their role anymore. Why should we be 1940's gentlemen for modern women?

queenofconvo · Answer

They can't provide their part despite wanting women to be so old fashioned 😂

TwoToTooTutu2 · Answer

Several generations of activists seeking to destroy the tradition of gender roles would probably be your culprit.

OddBeMe · Answer

It’s not that we don’t believe in it. We just don’t care. And if you want to truck with me, you pull your weight. No job, no dick.

Passing_by · Answer

Some do. But I agree, you don't get to see many men and women who believe in gender roles these days.

Deserter · Answer

Only cucked beta male simps don't because feminists told them not to, and because they're low in testosterone.

Anonymous · Answer

For one - these are sexist. For two - these are not feasible today unless the man is rich. How many men do you know, who are rich?

Snakeyes7 · Answer

If anything I've seen more women advocating for the rejection of traditional roles.

hostboy__fastestlaps · Answer

Not really, many of us still do. The ones who don't are brainwashed by woke TikTok and Twitter and subtle mainstream media

Anonymous · Answer

Because women don't believe in gender roles. And if they do they are either gold diggers, baby mamas or 30

Echosoul · Answer

We don't consider women as 1 dimensional house servants but as people.

IsoUser · Answer

I Honestly to God Just Have No Comment, other than guy's are just becoming more Affeminent

Twalli · Answer

Because women don't want all of them, like having no money or property

BLP11520 · Answer

I don't know, I am old fashioned. Work hard cut the lawn. Eat meat raised 2 boys.

Ringstretch · Answer

Society has changed everyone's opinion of the typical rolls

Sabretooth · Answer

I think some older values that should be revisited--like men paying for the first dates.

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

Hate to break it to you but most women don’t either anymore

Stephen_77 · Answer

Because most women are rebellious and have been brainwashed by feminism.

Anonymous · Answer

That's like asking why women don't believe in Chivlry.

Amur8711 · Answer

Because if you do your sexiest according to the leftist ideology.

GUSTAVUBER · Answer

Cause women dont listen to man and they dont cook or clean

Slim57 · Answer

Times are changing you need 2 people working a job in an average income family to make it work

EffaMan · Answer

because of netflix :D

FakeName123 · Answer

I do. But many women aren't worth the effort.

RealMarek · Answer

Soy-based diet plus indoctrination.

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

Girls take too much advantage of them

Hanrej · Answer

Because women conditioned them not to.

Guardian45 · Answer

Cuz they're like unicorns.

Jltakk · Answer

Because women in power don't.

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