Is it possible older guys are terrible at texting?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is 30 and he is a terrible texter.

He will reply after hours or reply with something completely dismissing my original text.

With phone calls, we can talk for hours and hours.

When we first met, he would put a lot of effort into texting me, asking me questions about myself and making clear he was seeking a relationship.

He was still kind of rubbish at texting sometimes but much better than now.

I’ve confronted him and he says he forgets and doesn’t realise.

Is it possible that as an older guy he’s just bad at texting?

I’m asking because I miss him all the time and want to feel closer to him.

Updates

1 y

To everyone saying my boyfriend doesn’t want to be with me etc - we talk on the phone and he’s very into me lol.

[DaveJord]

Honestly this like 2nd to 3rd post from you involving texting issue with your boyfriend. Last time it was because he was sick and didn't text you.

So honestly don't make excuses for him by thinking is his age is why he is bad at texting. It might not be him who has a texting problem. I mean he might, but some people, like possibly yourself, are classic over texters. Like they are suffocating with thier texting. Like it can seriously be too much. I mean heck I have fallen victim to this my self. The texts just went on and on, and I kept responding as to not offend the girl and then she accuse me off being a bad texter.

I think you need to give this guy some space, or you should break up with him and find some simp to date. Because arguing over texts or not texting is super annoying.

Some people just aren't into texting or wanting to text all the time. So if everything else is great about the relationship and you really love this guy, then chillnout over the texting. Respect the boundaries he's trying to set.

[DaveJord]

To the update- seems like your only want to hear what you want hear. If your talking every day then why need to text on top of it? If you'll so happy and in love whats your problem why this post?

You seem pretty needy to me. But again your not really looking for help or truth.. you only want hear what you want to hear.

[Asker]

I say you’re reading wayyyyyyy too much into it lol

[DaveJord]

So why posting about none issues then brushing people off like they don't get it?

What is it you want to hear? I am confused? Tell me what you think the problem is and why you feel the way you feel?

You say I am reading to much into it... well it all seems like a bunch over the top, childish whiny crap thats pretty superficial.

So whats the piont to all of this, set me straight because I don't get it?

[Asker]

I don’t have a problem. My boyfriend ignores my texts sometimes and it can be kind of frustrating and he says he forgets etc. I’m wondering if other people have similar experiences. He’s still my baby I’m not mad at him

[DaveJord]

No I don't have that problem. My babe always replies. I send her a good morning text every morning. She replies.

We have the same lunch break, so she calls me every day at lunch and eat together and chat for 30 minutes or so.

She I get off at 4 pm she gets off at 5 pm. She calls me as she drives home so we have 15 to 20 minute phone call every day then. And I always call to wish her good night, and she always answers. So that's a 5 minute phone call tops.

In an average day we talk for 1 hours and we only send one text to each other to wish each other good morning. And we spend at least 3 out 4 weekends together. When don't get together on a weekend, we do the good morning text, she calls me once during the day for about 30 minutes, and I give her my good night call.

So not knowing how much much you and yours talk during the course of a week, or how often you text him in any one day... I cannot say why he forgets or doesn't respond. But me and my girlfriend hardly text at all because we hate texting. We both find it annoying. I am 45 and she's 46 so we come from a different generation.

How often do you text your boyfriend in an average day? If its more than 5 to 6 times them its might too much. Guys don't like texts.

When I am think of my girl I might send her a kiss emoji. No text though just a, ❤💋 and she always replies with 🥰❤.

But that is like maybe once or twice a week.

So if you just sending short I love type texts and he's not replying thats kind of weak, and I don't know why it would be hard to just say I love you back. But if he doesn't want to get trapped into a long text conversation then yeah guys will ignore it.

[Asker]

Well I guess every relationship and couple is different! Narrowing it down to 5 texts a day makes sense lol because exactly he won’t go more than that 😂

Our texts are more like brief little updates here and there but the core of our communication is through the phone. We call a few times a week because actually I don’t have the energy for a phone call every day myself lol. I also like my alone time. The only frustration I’ve had with him is when I text him a question and he doesn’t reply until night time or the next day or he texts me completely ignoring my question.

[Lynx122]

I like texting if it's on the pc lol. I don't like being on my phone much. I use it for an alarm and as a clock mostly and sometimes when I'm out and have to do something or find the way but otherwise it just lies around. When I don't have WhatsApp open on the computer I might not see messages for a day or even more sometimes. But discord is always open on the pc so if you want to text me use discord. But a lot of people are too lazy or set in their was to install it. I like talking on discord the most anyway and I feel like there's more interesting people there. That's just my impression.

[Smoke-n-Growls]

No, that's just a lazy man wanting to blame "forgetfulness" for his lack of effort.

I used to be bad at texting. It took time and effort to turn that around. I set reminders, I write notes, I give myself deadlines.

Because the people I love deserve my time and effort.

Get you someone who will put in the effort to be in touch. Not hide behind being forgetful instead of owning up to it.

He's 30. He's not a high schooler. If he has relationships in his life he wants to keep, he has to put in effort.

Don't lower your standards.

[IveGotNoName]

He probably never liked texting in the first place. It's natural that the texting becomes less frequent, as bad as it sounds he was trying to get you back then, and now that he has you, he doesn't feel the need to do something he doesn't particularly enjoy. I don't believe it to be a conscious thing, it was a conscious thing when he tested you frquently. It doesn't mean his feelings have changed, just that he feels more secure, which is never a bad thing.

[Asker]

Thanks! I totally agree with you

[Man-O-Metal]

It's good to miss him, but don't think about it all the time. You'll go flipping nuts overthinking this. I talk to a lot of people on my phone and in person... If I forget to talk with someone or get back to them about what we discussed earlier, it's because I'm fricking busy. All the people I talk to understand this. Don't freak out, and if you need to, talk to him about it. Just don't ask him directly why he doesn't text you. Ask him what's kept him so busy lately. Just ask an "I'm emotionally interested" question without sounding like you're accusing him of something.

[DoctorSex]

Try and find out his personality type.
Everyone has a different love language and some people have more energy for an activity you find emotionally or mentally draining.

One of the hardest things I think humans find difficult to wrap their heads around and this is not about you personally, but generally speaking; is that people have very different nature's and ways of seeing the world that is absolutely alien to you, but there's types of personalities have been in the world just as long as yours lol and they have a right to be here to!

Kind regards,

[HighValue]

Once you have met in person and are able to meet somewhat frequently (once per week) then texting seems pretty pointless and a waste of time. People that are good at conversation often get bored, annoyed, or frustrated by texting because it does not flow like normal conversation does.
Stupid people that can't think quickly or need to constantly look things up in order to respond to questions prefer texting. People that are better at conversation prefer in person communication or talking on the phone.

[Lliam]

I think texting is about as conversational as telegraph.

I'm an old guy and I use text for simple things like "What time are you going to be home?", "Did you have plans for dinner?", or "I'm going to stop at the store, do you need anything?"

I hate conversational texting on a phone. If I'm going to message back and forth, I'll do it on my laptop. Typing on a phone is a pain in the ass. It can be fun to message photos, though.

[Jamie05rhs]

Most women want a high-value man. High-value men have shit to do and don't have time to be texting all the damn day.

[Kaneki05]

There is a reason why I have a very limited selection of people I talk to you'll find most people are bad at actually listening and responding or understanding. Which that just comes with any age. If people were good at it there would be much less problems in the world and more people would get along.
So I think this is more of overall issue than just him.

[shaysh87]

maybe he just does not like to text. some people don't like to text. I personally hate texting because i have to pull out my phone a million times throughout the day. its like having a side job responding to texts.

but if he forgets, then that means he's not obsessed about you as you are about him. you don't just forget a text even if you're super busy.

[ChrisMaster69]

It’s more down to what a person is familiar with.

remember for us older lot, we started texting off, all you had at the start were text messages and basic ones at that, which cost money and limited to number of characters.

I've always txt’d, mainly WhatsApp these days, however it is far better than a call 99% of the time, as calls do actually interrupt, whereas a text takes seconds to read,

Some people just suck at it, no matter the age or gender.

[LovingLoverReturned]

No, it isn't about age at all. I have friends in their thirties who writes a lot to me back and forth... and even an elderly friend who writes lots (difference is he has more free time than any young person but still he types A LOT lol)

I also have younger friends who do not like texting, they prefer a phone call (I have limited tolerance for phone calls)... once in a blue they will text but it's still limited for them.

[LovingLoverReturned]

I think it has to do with what they are accustomed to since young... I have always been a writer... on the other hand I know my friend who is about 27 is not accustomed to texting despite being young.

[DarkWinterNights]

Yes and no. We’re just busy and texting just for the sake of texting can be distracting. I don’t mind texting someone back and forth for a few minutes about something, but I got stuff to do.
This doesn’t mean he doesn’t find you interesting, but you have to understand he does probably have a job, hobbies, friends & family and other responsibilities.

[Crafteroon]

Depends on what kind of texter you are. How often do you text him, are your texts short or long (responding to "K" is asking for trouble), are your texts something that require a response or a general comment on the current situation?

[Asker]

We text every day. Sometimes I’ll ask a general question to do with what I’m doing now

[Fireguy17]

I'm even older, and my phone is not my priority.
I have other things to do than wait for a text, unless I know that it will be important.
If I am able I will answer a phone call right away, unless I'm in the middle of something where I just can't at that moment.

[Anonymous]

30 isn't even old. age doesn't dictate how much someone texts. personality does. my mom texts way too much for instance. i just don't think he's that interested in you anymore. someone that i'm interested in, i would definitely be texting them a lot. and if not, i'd tell them i'm busy at the moment. and not "dismiss" texts. yours seems to just be fading away...

[notwoke]

I find extended texting to be exhausting. Call me if you have anything much beyond 3 or 4 replies to the original text. Chances are I'm actually doing something and you are interrupting me. Also, If I'm talking to someone in person or engaged in any meaningful activity your text will wait till later. If it's important you'll call

[Pinay_ako]

Grown ass men have little to no time for texting. They’d prefer calling instead. They have a lot on their plate and they’re working hard all day but that doesn’t mean they love you less.

[TommyMountainFigure]

I hardly look at my phone most of the time and it infuriates everyone.. but yep.. I hate texting.

[AviatorTom]

Age has nothing to do with it. Some people like to text, others don't like it. And some people are good at typing on a phone's display keyboard while others (like me, with fat fingers) are horrible.

[MTC29]

I hate texting. I will use WhatsApp because it is linked to my desktop so that I can type while using my keyboard.

[Anonymous]

yeah i never text people , and had terrible truly terrible experiences with girls when i did try and text them , send rude things back , wonder how or why i was texting them to begin with it never went well so don't focus too much on it

[Kiss_Me]

You will find that older guys are NOT into dating text on a screen. They will want to meet up and actually have a conversation.