Why do guys only see me as a sex object?

[Anonymous]

I’m 18 years old. In my training, thaiboxing guys flirt with me and stare at my ass and boobs. I dont even hade big boobs only b cups. Im not trying to be pick me but i have a nice body (i’m a gym girl) i think my body looks special because i work hard for it. My face is also nice and cute but the problem here is that they flirt with me and i get uncomfortable. Like can't we be friends and i can i not be seen as something else than a sexual object? They stare at my chest and my ass and i feel uncomfortable trying to drink water out of a crane because im bending down and they stare more. I dont want this kind of attention, i want to be seen as a “bro” but u feel like many guys trying to play me and they think im stupid to realize. I dont want people at my training to flirt with me. Its so awkward. What should i do?

[laurieluvsit]

Society teaches girls to reject their sexuality. Don't do that. Accept it and learn to appreciate it.

Creepy guys are another story and question all together. Learn to joke about it with them or tell them to bug off or find another gym to workout in.

My 2 sisters and I also practice MMA.

Good luck!

Valentina Shevchenko - Women's UFC MMA Flyweight Division Champion and former Muay Thai Champion

[chicosuave]

I read all the comments. It seems like you love the attention and you're not willing to find another gym. If it bothers you so much then move to a different gym. You can't control what men do. Even if you tell them not to stare they will stare either way. You can't do anything about people staring at each other. Unless the government makes it illegal to stare at other humans. As much as women want that but it ain't happening. You're trainer is what every other guy does, we stare at women even when we have gfs. That's what we do. Unfortunately women and men dont combine together when it comes to attraction. If you want to train in that same gym you have to dress like a gangster and what i mean by that is in baggy clothes. Why do you think Muslim religion requires women to dress in long dresses? So men won't stare. They understand what's happening. You can't control men and men can't control women. It's how it is

[Anonymous]

I assume you've already made it crystal clear that you feel uncomfortable with them flirting and staring.

However the solution is to look for female only thaiboxing. Only a few men will have the discipline to disregard their biological urges but few will be able to manage it at that age. You should also take into consideration that some exercises elevate testosterone levels too. Have you ever considered how distracting and challenging it is for a guy at 18 years of age full of hormones trying to learn martial arts with a female that has 'a nice body and a nice and cute face.' You could be just as much as an embarrassment to them too if they have to try not to get untimely signs of attraction. It goes both ways.

[Asker]

I didn't tell them, but i have shown signs im not intrested. Because if i tell them it would get awkward as fuck. I try to ignore them, not engage in conversations and act unintrested and uncomfortable. The guy that flirt with me the most is 28 and im the one who is 18. The guy is turning 29 soon and im turning 19 soon. I still feel like im too young for him to get turned on me. Like does guys not control themselves? Like if a girl is 10 years younger than you its wrong to get turned on her and flirt with her and stare intensely at her private areas. One time i wore tights of a light color and i didn't know but you could see a little bit of the shape of my thong and he stared sooo much like literally stood and stared. I also have hormones, females also get turned on but you can decide who you would get turned on.

[Opinion Owner]

If you aren't prepared to wear more baggy clothing you need to bear in mind that you cannot control how others act, or what they do either. You can only control what you do. Therefore if you're not prepared to change your clothing because 'I wear those clothes for me, theyre workout clothes. I dont want guys to decide what clothes im able to wear. '

You want to decide how guys should act but you can't. Therefore as I said you should find a female only thaiboxing place.

You said you don't want to tell them because it would get awkward but it's already awkward...

[Asker]

Bro he’s my trainee and he has a 9 year relationship, he lives with his girlfriend, and still stares at me at places he shouldn’t. One time when he asked about my age i said 18 and he told me he’s 28 but feel like 16

[Subarugirl]

Establish and maintain boundaries. If someone does something to you that you don’t like speak up. If you see something say something.

[Reaper1985]

generally speaking straight healthy males are driven by primal urges to seek out healthy females they find attractive it biology. similar to how straight health females are driven by primal urges to find healthy males who can help her produce healthy off spring. while also helping her to provided and protect the off spring.

while some girls might be going to the gym to better themselves. there are those who go to the gym so they can attract attention from others. so it's sometimes hard for guys to notice the difference between the two types of girls. even more so since many girls tend to wear figure flattering clothing which showcases their bodies.

[MCheetah]

If you start acting and dressing more like "one of the guys," then guys will stop treating you like the hot girl at the dojo. Because that is what you are (intentionally or not) putting out there. Hell, you spent half this post bragging about good looking you are. Unless you only hang around gay men, you can't have it both ways. And I honestly think you wouldn't want a lack of attention anyway.

[KrakenAttackin]

@mcheetah She's female, common sense is irrelevant.

[MrButty88]

I know what you go through, people see me as a sex object all the time. In middle school, I was known as "The guy with the big butt". But I eventually learned to own it. Even after some girl called me a "Big Booty Ho"

Here is a pic for reference:

[Anonymous]

According to you you’re a pretty attractive young girl doing physical activity with guys. Plus if you’re wearing tight clothes while you’re at it then of course you’ll get attention from those guys. That’s just the reality of it. You can’t just want to be one of the bros especially if they’re attracted to you.

[DryGermanGuy]

That's why there are women-only gyms... :-/

Call these guys out in a louder voice maybe? -> "How is the girlfriend?" You do this ten times in a row, he might get the picture...

[Sparkie460]

Maybe if you wore loose fitting clothes they won't be able to see your fit body. There would be nothing to look at if you did.

[Asker]

But I wear those clothes for me, theyre workout clothes. I dont want guys to decide what clothes im able to wear.

[Sparkie460]

Yes I understand that. You should be able to wear whatever you want that's comfortable for you. Guys can't control themselves. When they see a beautiful woman they just can't resist but to look, or stare. Maybe you can talk to the trainer and ask them to talk to the guys about staring at you.

[Asker]

Actually its the trainer that is 28 years old that stare at me a lot. One time i drank water from a crane in a small room while bending, i was wearing tights and apparently he was behind and watched my ass from behind. He stared and when i was done he flirted with me.

[Sparkie460]

Oh. Well then if you're not interested in dating him you should talk to him and set him straight. Ask him politely to not stare at you. Tell him you're flattered but your not interested

[Asker]

He has a girlfriend and he acts like that… i feel sorry for his girlfriend

[Sparkie460]

To be honest, I'm married but I still look. I don't stare at women but I'll check them out then go on with what I'm doing. I don't want to make them feel uncomfortable. I'm a man but not a pervert

[Sparkie460]

All I can say is that you should take him to the side and tell him that he is making you uncomfortable by staring at you and flirting with you. If he doesn't stop, go to whoever is above him

[Xtendable]

It sounds awkward and also like you are the minority there which would make it difficult to speak up on how you’re feeling. How are you finding out these guys, like your trainer, is checking you out?

[KrakenAttackin]

Let me guess, you wear skin tight gym clothes.

[Asker]

Yes so what?

[KrakenAttackin]

So clueless.

[Asker]

Man this is workout clothes love it or nit? What should i else wear when i workout? Please the guys there are topless but i dont stare at them

[MCheetah]

The guys being topless isn't right, either.
His point is, most men aren't gay or asexual, but you're acting like they should before your benefit. That's not reality. Either ignore them and just accept you're good looking (what a HUGE problem that must be! 🙄), or stop going to that gym.

[KrakenAttackin]

@MCheetah Exactly right.

[Gangactivities911]

Most guys don’t realize female attraction doesn’t work like male attraction and that they can’t just walk up to u and start flirting with u.

[In_Trance]

It's most likely the way that you're presenting yourself to them

[Anonymous]

If you dress in cloth body paint or expose your body, you will be seen as a sex object only

[Asker]

Man i wear gym tights?

[Opinion Owner]

Gym tights are worn for sexual attention. they are not a requirement.

[Asker]

Man what the fuck. What sexual attention? They are literally workout clothes that are comfortable? The guys here go shirtless no one stares at them in a creepy way

[Opinion Owner]

guys do not go topless at most gyms, and those that do want attention.
wearing clothing that is painted on is done to expose your crotch and ass to the opposite sex. A pair of shorts or joggers is just as comfy.
you don’t see guys exposing their cock, if they wear tights they put shorts over them

[Keyboardkat]

What do you mean by "thaiboxing"?

[MCheetah]

She probably meant Muay Thai.

[Keyboardkat]

@MCheetah Sorry to show my ignorance, but I don't know what that is, either.

[MCheetah]

... It's Thai (kick) boxing, like she originally said. 😐

[Asker]

Thai boxing isn’t kickboxing but okay.

[jasco]

Tell them not to flirt with you duh

[Asker]

I already acted like i didn't like it, i was lije giving a “wtf is wrong with u leave me alone” vibe but they still

[jasco]

Look I don't know why y'all females keep thinking vibes mean shit to most guys. Used your words. Tell them to stop.

[LimitedBenefits101]

okay? become FAT then

[Anonymous]

🤣🤣🤣

[Asker]

What’s so funny