Been sleeping with this man for 12 years on and off, we hooked up the other night and he said I love you while having sex, twice… Did he mean it?

[Madix12]

I’ve known him since I was 15, I’m 29. I always wanted him to be mine but I was scared to ever tell him bc I didn’t want to scare him away, a few nights ago we slept together and he said I love you, twice. I just kinda went w the flow but it’s been 3-4 days and I can’t stop thinking about it. We’ve spoke since then but not about this. Our conversations about life are deep, spirituality, etc etc. But never deep about who we are as people. We know nothing about each other’s life other than work.. Which is crazy because I honestly feel like I know his soul? To be truthful I’ve always Made sure not to get to close, bc of strong emotions. I don’t think I’ve ever even dated anyone and felt this way.. Keep in mind, we were never official nor have we went out on a date. It really has always just been sex. I’m SO confused.

[Biancam13]

I'm sorry but not necessarily. I wouldn't count the "I love you"s during sex, maybe just count the ones out of the bedroom. Just from personal experience.

[Madix12]

That’s what I told myself, like he walk talking to my vagina lol but the more I think about it, how long it took for him to say, the memories we have, some bad, mostly good.. I just think there might be something more there. I wishhhh I could believe him sis 😂 I want to, almost do but like, I don't know I’ve been heart broken before and even if I’m not more than a hook up to him, he is to me. It’ll really hurt to lose him.

[FilmGuy93]

It's pretty obvious that whatever you guys have goes beyond basic sex. Just play it cool and see if he keeps saying it. He might genuinely love you.

[Madix12]

That’s what I’m trying to do, but it’s just been like constant non stop distracting. He’s told me he has love for me, many times which made it easier to see this as a hookup, saying I love you, it’s a whole different conversation.

[FilmGuy93]

Sometimes the act of putting a label on something like that is more stressful than just having the relationship, does that make sense? He loves you, he's expressing that love for you, he feels a very strong bond with you. I totally understand why you want to define the relationship, but my opinion is that your best move here might be to just enjoy this for whatever it is, and only try to define the relationship after you two have settled into the new groove of things.

[Madix12]

That made me tear up, thank you 🥹 I feel like I’ve been going crazy. I put him on a pedestal unbeknownst to him &by doing that I think I’ve came to believe I’m not good enough for him, which makes me question everything. I don’t need a title, I just wish I knew exactly how he felt about me. But you’re right, I just needa chill and be grateful

[FilmGuy93]

Best of luck! =)

[spartan55]

Confused? ... it's sex. If he wanted more you would know it.

[Madix12]

Then why’dddddd he say this dumb shit 😭😭😂🤯

[spartan55]

Say what dumb shit?

[Madix12]

Why would he say he loves me during sex, like he means it if he doesn’t?

[spartan55]

Guys say all kinds of shit during sex. I wouldn't ever take any of it to heart. ESPECIALLY when your relationship is basically just sex. Saying I love you doesn't give you the instant upgrade.

[abc3643]

I think that, if you want it, you can be in an actual couple with him.

[MiseriaCantareAFI]

so, youve been wasting your time with a guy who can't commit

[Madix12]

If that’s the case, he can say that about me? We’ve never talked of commitment and we’ve both dated other people during these years

[MiseriaCantareAFI]

yet, you'll fuck him WHILE dating other people

This is why I don't date. Women like you!

[Madix12]

Lol, we’ve never cheated with each other. Him and I have cut each other off bc one of us was in a relationship. &Its not like we break up w other people and run to each other, we go months without talking sometimes. We just always end up back in each other’s lives.

[MiseriaCantareAFI]

Like an friends with benefits

PATHETIC, ABSOLUTELY PATHETIC

Again, it sounds to me like you have sex, while in relationships

Like I said, this is why i don't date women

PEOPLE LIKE YOU

[Staximus]

Stop putting up a wall between the two of you and speak your mind

[Guy13]

Is he married ⁉️

[Madix12]

No he’s not

[Guy13]

🎉🎉🎉. What’s the hold-up ⁉️

[Madix12]

Fear that he said that shit in the moment and didn’t mean it fr lol 🥴

[Guy13]

It sounds like a plea for a chance to find out how deep that love is…it’s like saying I’m really going to try, right 🤷🏻‍♂️. There is still real-life Discovery?

[Madix12]

I do want to know, I just I don't know he makes me really happy and losing that is just unimaginable. Besides, I wouldn’t even know how to start the conversation, &I’m usually very good w my words, 😭😂

[Guy13]

Sometimes common sense + fear = Good Decision 🤷🏻‍♂️

[Madix12]

So you think I should talk to him about it?

[Guy13]

Just start going out on dates like a couple and see where it goes🤷🏻‍♂️
Action speaks more for me. It’s just me…

[Iron_Man]

After 12 years why don’t you ask him

[Madix12]

Because I’m scared of his response, I’m scared it’ll damage the relationship we do have if he really was just caught up in the moment..

[Iron_Man]

After 12 years just drop some hints nothing should be damaged you both know each other very well

[Anonymous]

If you want him, get him