Should I date a guy who said he really likes me but would only date me if I had lost some weight?

[pupluv45]

Updates

+1 y

is he worth my time?

Updates

+1 y

im not severely overweight either

[johnathon00]

The decision of whether or not to date someone is a personal one and ultimately depends on your own feelings and values. However, in this particular situation, it's important to consider whether or not this person's attitude towards your weight is something you feel comfortable with.

Being told that someone is only interested in dating you if you lose weight can be hurtful, and can indicate that the person may not fully accept and appreciate you for who you are. Additionally, it can be a red flag that the person may have unrealistic and unhealthy attitudes towards body size and weight.

It's important to remember that everyone is entitled to their own preferences, but it's not okay for someone to make you feel bad about yourself or your body in order to change themselves to please another person.

If you decide to date someone, it's important that you feel comfortable and happy with yourself, and that the person you're dating accepts and respects you for who you are. If you are not comfortable in the relationship, or don't feel like your partner respects your well-being, it might be best to find someone who does.

It's important for you to surround yourself with people who see and treat you as a valuable human being and who accepts you for who you are, body shape and weight inclusive.

[Sparkie460]

If he can't love you as you are, he's not worth your time. Putting any type of condition on a relationship is wrong. If he doesn't love you the way you are he's only looking at your figure

[Sparkie460]

Thanks for the mho

[Catarine]

This would constantly be in your mind, that you must stay fit or you'll be single. If you two aren't serious yet maybe I wouldn't go for it. I've heard women who broke up with men for telling them that they ganied weight. Listen to your heart tho do you like him enough to be reminded every so often about your physique without feeling bad or do you believe that it's not worth it.

[Danny_dan92]

Think of it this way.




When you lose the weight you will look and feel better. And if you find him attractive you get him too.




So there literally is no loss in making that change that ultimately is for you

[pupluv45]

What if i gain weight after having a baby or when i get old?

[Danny_dan92]

There are women that have lost the weight after being pregnant and there are people that are old and are in shape

[pupluv45]

weight is not always easy to lose especially when you work a full time job and have 3 kids to take care of. most moms don't even get enough sleep.

what if i developed a disease that caused me to gain weight? weight gain is not always due to diet.

i just don't see it feasible to stay the rest of my life with a guy like that.

anything can happen. you can't ever be sure of how you turn out in life

[Danny_dan92]

How old are your kids if you don’t mind me asking? I’m assuming you’re a single mother too?

Ask yourself this question…. Is there ever a moment in your day to day routine. Where you sit down and watch tv for 1-3 hours? If so you should consider swapping that out with working out.

Also, take a look at your eating habits. IF you can afford it, switch to eating healthier foods. Otherwise just eat less if you cannot afford healthy food. (I’m aware healthy food is healthy)

I also understand what you mean about developing diseases that cause weight gain but those involve the pituitary gland. Those conditions are extremely rare

[pupluv45]

if I'm getting 5 hours of sleep a night, I am on my feet 8 hours a day. then i have to run home to cook and clean. do you really think i have any energy left for a workout?

[pupluv45]

[I also understand what you mean about developing diseases that cause weight gain but those involve the pituitary gland. Those conditions are extremely rare]

its not rare. I can break my hip, then become bed ridden and gain 20 pounds.

would it be fair for my husband to divorce me just because of that? I dont think so.

[Danny_dan92]

Yeah those are all fair points

[Berethor]

You can lose weight, but what if you gain weight after pregnancy, would he leave you?

[Vikkrram]

What the hell is That