How do I move on from this and am I in the wrong here?

[Anonymous]

Some background. He and I were involved for over 7 years, we even got married in a religious marriage. During those 7 years despite medical scans showing my ovaries were messed up and it is on record the doctor informing me I was basically infertile, which I gave him access to patient portal where my medical records are kept to prove this, I still deep down wanted to have a family with him and I disclosed this so many times over the years, and never once did he ever tell me he did not want kids with me. I truly did not know I could fall pregnant, due to what the medical scans had shown and what the doctor had told me, so this pregnancy came as a huge surprise to me. I only found out when he ended things with me around the time I fell pregnant, that he hated me! Now 7 months into my pregnancy he sends me this text message. How do I move on from this and let him go and more importantly how do I explain to my baby girl when she is older why her dad isn't around?

Updates

1 y

It's so damn confusing even when I found out i was pregnant, he still never said he never wanted the baby or that he never wanted to have kids with me! in fact at times he was asking to be kept updated about the baby, but now 7 months into the damn pregnancy and he says what he did in the text.

[boggboss]

All u can do is be a good parent to your daughter and remember what he said or how he feels as a remainder thatvthe love u 2 had was based on a fake idea

[Asker]

Why waste my time for 7 years and why even marry me just to then say all of this after I fall pregnant. Thank you for your help

[boggboss]

Because he felt like he was forced to that much is clear and he probably stayed under the belief u couldn't get pregnant so that was a plus for him

[Asker]

He was never forced to stay, he was the one who chose to stay and he was the one who brought up the whole us getting married and he was also the one who convinced me to change my religion so that we could get married. 7 years we were involved and he always knew I wanted us to have a family together even if it meant adoption but he still never once said he did not want kids with me, even after I fell pregnant he still never said he did not want the baby or that he never wanted kids with me, it was only less then 3 months until bub is due did he tell me all of this.

[boggboss]

I'm not defending him just explaining that for some reason that's what his family pushed for and he listened like a idiot unfortunately keeping u hooked on the way

[Asker]

Sorry I didn't mean to snap. I do appreciate your help. Just struggling to understand why.

[boggboss]

Because he was not honest and I would think only stayed because he could have unprotected sex without worry of u getting pregnant

[Asker]

Every partner he has had, he has always had unprotected sex, we had sex the first time we met and that was before he even knew about my medical history. He hates condoms! I'm just the one who fell pregnant. He is almost 40 years old. I know he does want kids because he talked about that with me. He just failed to tell me it was me who he didn't want kids with. This will be his first ever child and potentially maybe his only biological child, as well. I really do appreciate your help thank you. Sorry for blabbing on.

[boggboss]

Why would u say potentially he only biological child?

[Asker]

His age, he smokes a lot especially weed. He is unable to hold jobs.

[Guy13]

Your guess is as good as mine. Good luck with it all