Is the reason I think guys being friendly are flirting is cause I’ve never been a tomboy?

[Anonymous]

Never really hanged out with boys unlike a lot of girls. They know how to play with boys and do banter and joking. To me it’s not natural to do that stuff and I don’t really like it. I am mot quick or whatever. I’m a girly girl inside and I am soft and weak.

[PrettyPriya]

It is hard to say. There is a difference between being friendly and flirting. If you are not used to that, it could be hard to decipher which they are doing. I am not sure it has anything to do with not being a "tomboy" or being girly.

I think that is more of a lack of experience. Seems as if you don't have much interaction and therefore don't recognize the difference. Some guys just have a naturally friendly personality. They are like that to most everyone. That is a good way to know if it is flirting or friendly. They will act the same to everyone.

Now, flirting is a bit tricky because everyone does it differently. However, going back to what I said, they will typically only flirt with just you and not others. So, in a group setting, you should be able to tell if it is a personality trait of being friendly or if they are trying to get your attention.

I hope this makes sense and I would be happy to expand if it doesn't.

[Asker]

Well in my case with this one guy I’m thinking about, I’ve noticed that he is friendly and a lot of signs were me misreading them before I got to notice him with everyone else. But some stuff is very playful and I think if a more tomboy or more socially savvy girl was in my place they would know how to go back and forth with him and have that playful fun guys typically have with each other (or guys and girls, I don’t know), but instead I just end up standing there kind of smiling but also with a raised eyebrow, that sort of thing. Confused and also giggling but i have nothing to really say back generally.

[PrettyPriya]

Is it the context of the conversation that has you lost for words or is it just general chatting?

[Asker]

It’s general stuff. He actually says a lot of the same things. He’s just being humorous. but the way I am wired just has my heart:brain react in an ‘I’m being attacked’ way. I prefer straightforward and gentle behavior generally.

[PrettyPriya]

What I can tell so far is maybe there is an incompatibility issue between you and him. Do you like him? Other than the awkward banter?

[Asker]

Hahah yeah. Lol I guess it is awkward banter but he keeps it up so not sure what he’s thinking of it himself. But yes I’ve liked him since I saw him.

[PrettyPriya]

Might be a case of you having to steer the conversation when that awkward stuff happens. Get things back on track where you are comfortable. I guess what I mean is when that happens, you are going to have to bring something up to move the conversation in a concrete direction.

[Asker]

Thank you I think I can try that!

[Zandoval]

Nah. You're fine the way you are. Not all girls are comfy with that.

[boggboss]

So whats the question

[boggboss]

Yes a inability to tell the difference between playful behaviour would be the reason

[Wise4myage]

Maybe if he knows about that.

[In_Trance]

No probably not