How can I best help to encourage fellow males to be less misogynistic to females?

[21Cowboy21]

- MGTOW I see is peaceful (most of them) to females and simply stated as they say - men simply just fed up with the nonsense and choosing to go their own way).

- INCELS I see have a significantly higher percentage of their members making of that sub-group of people being pre-dominantly male, but a small percentage of incels being females. And a growing sizable minority of them seem to be more vocal and more mysoginisitc online than in the past few years as their are a lot more of them now with the rise of social media and dating apps further disadvataging them more of the time than not.

- Is the best way to influence males who are mysoginisitc twats (I do not see females doing this practically ever to males on the flip side but too many males often shit on females for non-sense in a weak attempt to blame females for that male's own short comings so he can continue to be lazy and not feel as guilty or bad about himself). How can we correct this non-sense coming from mostly males in society?

- I understand their is a small amount of female "feminiazis" as I have seen someone coin the term this year describing third wave feminists specifically who may be extreme/sexist to males but they seem to be a very absurd outliar amoungst all females as a group. The male mysoginists though are not an outliar which is what concerns me more in past few years. I don't wante future sons or daughters to have to go to elementry or high school surrounded by that crap from those loser's opinions.

Updates

+1 y

I guess what I'm trying to ask is if the best way to address it when we see that crap behaviours from a small but vocal minority of loser "incel" males as they like to call themselves now - to ignore it, or respond to the individual in an attempt to educate them, or crap on the male and call them out publicly when they are acting like twats to females?

In person I would just clock them at a pub and it resolves thing pretty quick.

Updates

+1 y

Was at a bar and my girlfriend at the time was dancing with her girlfriends while I was getting her a drink on my own and buddy felt her up which made her uncomfortable and didn't take the hint after she pushed him away to fuck off the first time.

[quaranta]

My current partner was an incel 15 years ago, an edgelord and a victim. Now, he is a feminist, way more than me, from some years.
I asked him about this story and basically what helped him out was:
1) Therapy.
2) Getting his first relationships and sex.
3) Getting female friends with no romantic/sexual intentions, aknowledging he can be just friend with women as well and doesn't need to crush on all of them; this helped him knowing them better as people first of all, without any "competition".
4) Getting into online themed communities regarding his own hobbies and interests, where women were around the half. Interacting with women being good at that hobby and occasionally meeting them for group activities made him observe women better and aknowledge their potential, without dating attempts.

I think therapy made him avoid a victimistic mentality and this was the key to get his first relationships, and later successful casual dating as well (no one wants a whining victim of himself to heal, who "in exchange" already expects you are in debt with him or owe him something, on behalf of the whole female gender - that cannot work in any way). In any case, though, it requires the will to evolve. You won't fix an incel by giving them a woman to talk with or a prostitute, it has to come from themselves. But maybe offering them successful stories of men escaping the inceldom could give them the inspiration to give it a chance.

[DizzyDesii]

This is sweet that you even considered defending us. Of course the first thing they’ll try to do is call you a white knight but ignore them. I dont think you go out of your way with stubborn people like them. Just respond the opposite of what they say. Them- “I hate female. Those whores never give me a chance.” You- “Well many have given me a chance. It won't always work out with each one but you have to remain patient until you meet a good one.” Of course they’ll continue with the bashing but you should just speak your little piece and walk away. They’ll be mad enough just knowing you didn't agree with them.

[DizzyDesii]

*i dont think you should go out of your way with stubborn people like them*

[21Cowboy21]

In their defense though I suppose this would be an example of "white knighting" pretty hard as I can see.

I have a friend who started working in a other department at his law firm and some of the other members there have quite a flavoured personality compared to how they act around their spouses vs not. I don't want any of that crap to rub off on him but its just minimal comment or two during the past year so far. He has a solid head on his shoulders so I'm sure he won't change too much.

[DizzyDesii]

But aren't White knights often the guys who can't get a girl so they try to have our backs so they can get laid? You already get play so you're just being a gentleman

[dynamicyandere]

You can lead by example, and show that it’s entirely possible to be a gentleman without being a simp or putting women on a pedestal.


You can be a confident gentleman that commands respect, without worshipping women.



So many of these immature misogynists view any sort of kindness shown to a women as “simping” when really there’s quite a big distinction between being considerate or respectful versus simping.


They need to be shown that there’s another way. And I think the best way to do that is to lead by example.


For my own relationship, my SO trusts me to be the leader of our relationship. She prefers that I lead and she respects my decisions. But, I’m not an d*ck. I’m a gentleman towards her. I open doors for her, we do chores together, I pay for our dates, I pay for our bills, I take care of her when she’s sick. I lead and she supports. To each their own, but this is just how we roll.


It’s entirely possible to be a gentleman without being a “beta” that these misogynists are so afraid to be.

[Anonymous]

It's an undeniable fact that a lot of males today are very angry about how they are viewed and treated in modern western society, and that anger is often directed toward women. Whether that's fair or not is debatable, but I personally think it is fair to some extent.

Regardless, we as a society need to understand the reasons behind it and start addressing them soon, because that much anger among that many young men is a very dangerous thing. We have been seeing the results more and more in things like mass shootings. That's getting worse, not better.

[Anonymous]

Ok Mr feminist lol,

What's wrong with you? Seriously, plenty of women act like abusive misandrist twats and nobody bats an eyelash. The only time I've seen any guys get upset is when women act without any accountability and blame others or when they themselves act misandrist and be the perpetual victim.

[Opinion Owner]

To your update, maybe someone should clock you.

[21Cowboy21]

I hear you and respect your opinion. I have certainly seen a lot of females sometimes treat guys like crap at clubs downtown in return or just use them for a free drink sometimes.

On reddit (mostly dominated by 70% male users which can distort things compared to what actually occurs in reality) - Id say just 10% of users can be horrible to the other gender (and both guys and girls can be capable of this) but most users are great people.

But I do see it coming from guys a lot more overall on reddit - as more users on reddit are males in general. But most users are great people.

[21Cowboy21]

Just wondering what you would recommend as best solution to help curb this kind of behaviour - that can occur from both genders as you rightfully bring up - when we see it. What your ideas may be.

[21Cowboy21]

And if say 70-80% of mysoginists are male and say only 20-30% are female online - males sense to help change the male behaviour that is undesirable for most people in society first, then the other's behaviours second.

You and I can start and we can lead by example - What solutions do you recommend we can do when encountering that to minimize that behaviour from males over time - and I can aim to follow suit with you and we can both lead others over time if successful.

[LiamJHayden]

It would require breaking the collectivist mindset, which is difficult. When someone has that mindset, he sees people not as individuals but as members of a monolithic group, sharing the traits (usually bad) with the worst members of said group. It is the basis for most of the bigotry out there.

[21Cowboy21]

That is very well said. I don't feel that all group think is automatically a force for vad always though as sometimes it can create things like movements for good that individuals on their own may not have bothered to do individually lile the climate change movement that is stsrting to gain traction in some countries.

I had never thought of the group influence before on the individual - I had always dwelled only on each isolated individuals actions before. That is good to try to get them first removed from those influences first - then can start focusing on real change once the external "bad" surrounding the individual is gone.

[Anonymous]

This is why you’re in a great relationship, you’re a logical man — you get it. The ones who are single and love spreading misogynistic hate will flock to this post, downvote or attack those who agree and try to tear you down. We need more men like you🙏

[RealMarek]

The best way to improve this problem is to advocate and practice monogamy. Large numbers of people “hooking up” has resulted in a significant percentage of women chasing a smaller percentage of men who are attractive enough to play the field. This leaves a large and growing percentage of young men without intimate relationships, which often leads to trouble.

[Guy13]

Be successful with the females and then maybe someone will pay you some mind.

[HappyWoman34]

Great question. I’ll read over it this afternoon and have an opinion. I just woke up now and need at least two coffees before I tackle this one.

[Anonymous]

Ok now I’m ready. well, I think there’s nothing to be done for other’s opinions. You just set a good example and stand up for women.

[Leopard23]

Best to stop simping maybe your woman won't be flirting with other guys

[WhiteBoyChill]

Dude just worry about your own damn self and stop trynna change everyone else

[JamesDiaz11]

Another male feminist lol

[Anonymous]

Execution or at least mock execution

[In_Trance]

good luck with that

[21Cowboy21]

I feel there always be a small subset of both genders who may feel like this - hopefully not though in the future.

[KrissAvarr00]

hmmmmmmm