I am part of a new friend group comprised of this guy, his cousin, best friends and their long-term partners. I really like him. I’ve only briefly met him twice. His cousin and cousin’s partner were keen to set us up, so was his best friend and his fiancé. The best friend and his fiancé still are but his cousin and his girlfriend changed their mind claiming we aren’t each others type. I was told by her to leave it at few months for a relationship. She is very obviously bullying the other girlfriends, trying to split her boyfriend from his cousin and friends etc. I honestly don’t trust her. I don’t trust she’s looking out for me.
On Saturday, his best friend and his fiancé (who I am actually now closest to) got us briefly talking. He asked me if I was single, my age (which he knew) and said ‘I’m 24 too! At 24 I feel rushed to … a relationship. How do you feel about it?’ (I can’t remember the actual word he used). He asked about my previous relationships and tried to joke around with me for a bit before cutting the convo as everyone else was putting on their coats. Before our convo, he had randomly put his hand on my shoulder twice when I was just standing beside him and made a point of loudly expressing concern about waiting for me to be collected.
My mother claims it means he’s looking a relationship and feels pressured in a good way. I took it as that. But since, I’ve started to wonder if he meant he feels like he should but it isn’t what he wants. I would like to message him but it’s not worth my time if he means he wants something casual.
What do you think he meant? Should I message him?
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seems like he well the preassure to be in a relationship as everyone is being in one or at this age everyone expects him to be in one. I would take it as he is not keen on relationship but it doesn't mean he doesn't want one if it happens. I would get to know him more on this hangouts and leave initiating to him but if you are very interested in him its ok to text him as well. You also dont know him well enough to know is he casual type of guy or more for relationship. You can also ask this people that know him or things you may find on his social media.
His future cousin-in-law told me he’s interested in fun now but if I wait a few months, he’ll want a relationship then. Realistically, I don’t feel I trust her at all with how she is acting towards him and everyone else in the group. His best friend told his fiancé (girl I’m now closest to) that for months he’s been saying he wants a wife and then saying he wants fun the next day on repeat. I could talk to him and ask but I’m scared that if I make moves now and he’s not ready, he’ll ride me off if we want different things. I’m also scared to leave it a few more months and up to chance because then he may have taken it as I’m not interested at all and I will have missed my opportunity. Likewise, what if I got to know him better (online or wait until in person) and it naturally develops into a relationship? I really don’t know what to do.
well dont make assumptions now, first get to know him and see, things aren't as they seem or how we imagine it to be, you try and see, life will surprise you how things dont happen how you expect them to
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