Is it bad to send nudes to a guy I’m getting to know to catch his attention? My friend brings it up and uses it against me?

[Anonymous]

[Screenwriter]

It is just about ALWAYS bad to put photos of your nude body online where they will be accessible forever. You do not know this person well enough to trust that he won't show these pictures to everybody he knows, or post them on some porno site for fun and commentary, along with your name!

Save nude photos for a longtime relationship where you know and trust the person will not use said photos to harm you or to get yucks from friends. Keep private things, like your body, private.

If your PERSONALITY doesn't light up his attention, you sending nude photos will give him the wrong impression, don't you think?

I don't know what friend keep bringing it up. But she doesn't sound like a friend to me. Maybe she's jealous and is trying to mess with your new relationship. I don't know WHAT to make of her telling you to do this. BE CAUTIOUS with a new person.

Wait. Know someone well before you do anything that could blow up in your face, ruin a future job or school prospect, or the impression you might give people in your future.

[kylee2437]

Kind of a bad idea. You don’t know this guy fully and you don’t know what his intentions are. If you send those, be prepared for those pics to be showed to other people because majority of the time, they always are never just for the guy.

[Asker]

He’s 30. I don’t think at that age he’s showing anybody plus we have no mutual friends I know him from the gym and neither of us socialise there with the others, I know him bc I added him online and we spoken for
Months

[kylee2437]

@asker I promise you , 30 year olds are not anymore mature than 20 year olds, especially men. You don’t know him enough

[Anonymous]

It's pathetic. Fuck him. You're just as good as him. Don't belittle yourself like that. And certainly do use sex urge as a weapon. Porn industry is already doing that. Porn epidemic happening and people dont even know about it.

[Asker]

What makes you think it’s belittling myself?

[Opinion Owner]

Because you're going to far for his attention

[Asker]

Will he think I’m desperate? Should I admit I fucked up by being sexually forward like that and let him know we want different things I’m changing my ways so I think there’s no reason for us to keep talking

[spartan55]

To 'get attention'. I bet you are the type that you get screwed over by 'players' all the time. Do what you want, but know this: no dude will ever respect you or take you seriously if that's how you need to get his attention.

[California_Poppy]

I don't think you should do it. Not until you are exclusive and know each other pretty well. You should not trust just anyone with pictures like that.
Also, some guys might find it off putting if they are looking for something more than just causal sex.

[Asker]

Oh this is a guy that I’m sure wasn’t taking me seriously anyway maybe your right. I just feel my friend bringing it up to use it as a weapon to use against me was wrong everyone makes mistakes and it’s not like it’s random guys it’s people I have been talking to for months

[California_Poppy]

Yeah, unfortunately, being overly sexual too soon can make a guy not take you as seriously because it can give off the impression that you are just looking for sex and not a relationship.
But that's okay. We live and learn. If I were you, I wouldn't send him anymore. As the saying goes, 'why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?'
He's probably already made his decision about whether he wants a serious relationship with you.

Your friend sounds like a dick. It sucks to lose friends but I hope you know that you don't have to keep people like that in your life.

[Asker]

Is it okay to just admit that I’ve gone too far and been too sexually forward and move on if he asks I can let him know I’m trying to change and I feel we want different things so I think we should go our separate ways? If I talk to him again then it’s possible he’ll
Ask or hint and I don't know I don’t wanna go down that rabbit hole again

[California_Poppy]

You can if you want to but I don't think you need to. You are a grown woman and a sexual being, and you really dont need to feel any shame or accept any blame.

If you are ready to move on, I would just say that you get the impression that you guys are looking for different things. And that's okay! I'm sure there are other things he has done or said to make you feel that way.
You can bring up the pics but he's not going to say or admit to anything that would stop you from sending more. So I would just keep it to the core issue.

All that being said, don't get discouraged. Pictures like that are a fun way to be intimate with someone. I would just recommend that you have their attention *first*, instead of using them to get their attention.
In the future, if you know the guy pretty well, you can trust him, and you have a good feeling about where the relationship is going, I promise you, pics like that will be much more appreciated.

[Fireguy17]

Yes, it is a horrible idea.
Once they are out there you have no control of what happens with them.
Plus some will try to blackmail you, give me money or I will post them.
So yes, it is not a smart thing to do at all.
Just dont.

[provokeesmokee]

Sending unrequested nudes is sexual harassment.

If you want to sexually harass this poor guy, and deal with whatever those consequences are, do you.

But your friend is right and you deserve their derision.

[Asker]

He was delighted and asked for more so what are you talking about? My friend is separate from the situation

[CountryWanderer]

Once you send them assume they're anywhere on the internet. So no, definitely not a good idea.

[ChooChooHaha]

Yes and yes. And that's not a friend if she's throwing it in your face.

[OlderAndWiser]

Do you want him to get to know your pussy or get to know all of you?

[strateguy632]

depends after you met in person i think you are fine but before you met in person i agree with her.

[LostandFound__x]

Probably not the best idea if you want a serious relationship.

[Lauliss]

Bruh, you're really crazy. You're gonna regret it later...

[Asker]

How does it make me crazy?

[Lauliss]

No one in his/her sane mind sends a nude picture online, knowing the risks.

[ColHathi]

Depends. If you can trust the guy and rely on him not to treat you differently just because of the nudes, then I think it's probably fine.

[honestanswersonly_]

Depends. How nude are you in the pic you might send?

[Asker]

You can see my butt and the back of my vag.

[honestanswersonly_]

Yea thats a bit much to send someone you barely no or trust.

[Asker]

Do you think he thinks I’m easy and will stop taking me serious? he's known me since March I did this once

[honestanswersonly_]

You should worry about if he shows people it. Yea he might think your easy

[honestanswersonly_]

Tbh id have to see the pic really. But gunna say if you like him then just be yourself

[gothbxtch]

do not send them without his consent, or it’s sexual harassment

[slatyb]

Don't if you could be identified in the images.

[dudeinohio]

Just don't tell your friend and do what you want.

[Aces8]

You can send them to me

[riverrat3]

Can you trust him, leave your face off

[Anonymous]

Thats actually a great idea.