Why do men only show interest in me once I lose interest in them?

[Anonymous]

[_Maya_]

They then want what they can't have. Everyone likes attention when they can get it. Once it is gone they want it back. It goes back to that people want what they can't have. It drives them more when they find out it is no longer an option. Maybe you need to show more interest or make a move so they show interest when you do. I'm guessing you lose interest because they aren't showing any. That could be because you aren't putting out enough signals that you are interested. Just one possibility.

[Asker]

im afraid they only want validation from me and dont find me appealing and interesting once i show interest in them

[_Maya_]

I mean that's a possibility. But if they didn't find you appealing then I would guess they would never show interest no matter what. You probably aren't giving yourself enough credit hun.

[ManOnFire]

This is a common exchange of energy, with both men and women. When you pull away that's when they feel it and want to come back to you. It happens with women as well, and I wonder if it's stronger on women than it is on men. No contact seems to really work on them. In every situation I've been in with a woman and things didn't work out, I either went radio silent on them or decided to cut them out altogether, and every time they tried to come back. Women get curious about you, even if they wanted to leave you thinking they're done. They always want to know what you're doing, if you got somebody new, etc.

[TruthBeTold77]

Some people are attention whores that liked to have their ego stroked you've taken that away so that what it make. Their are actually very insecure so are always seeking validation from others you take it away then they feel bad about themselves again so try win back the attention to make themselves feel worthy and stroke their ego. They seek attention from all. Don't waste your time dating these kinds of people they will still seek attention outside of you. They don't need a relationship they need therapy or something.

[Asker]

He really does act now as if he has a crush now. Everytime he sees me from afar he gets slightly nervous and he tells all his friends about me

[TruthBeTold77]

I mean if you want to go for it then do so. I personally stay clear of people like that they just end up being an headache I don't wish to have. But if he really genuinely like you then he he would of said when you liked him.

[Asker]

He barely knows me

[TruthBeTold77]

So you barely know him but still liked him. He only like you after you stopped showing interest in him. Honestly just do as please I'm not bothered as it's not my life. You clearly want to so go ahead.

[Asker]

I don’t know what to do. He seems like a nice serious guy who needs attention and I Don’t know if he just wants to use me or if I was being too desperate before

[TruthBeTold77]

I personally think he just likes the attention but obviously it's your life so do what you feel is right. I'd definitely sit with it for a bit. What's he doing? Is asking you out so he can get to know you better? If not I'd personally just ignore him as I think he is just seeking attention.

[Asker]

He is always staring at me from afar with Wide eyes

[Asker]

He talks about me to his friends and he made me a Spotify playlist

[TruthBeTold77]

I don't know. I personally wouldn't put all my eggs into one basket with this one. Maybe just hold back and how he keeps behaving until he proves that he actually likes you then keep your options open.

[strawberrybaby3]

Because men love chasing. Once you pull back, it’s something that they can sense. It makes them want to go after you because you become something that they can’t have.

[Asker]

Yes but how can a relationship develop then? And would they also chase women they wouldn’t find hot otherwise?

[DarkWinterNights]

Most guys actually hate chasing. Chasing = playing games.

[midnightmoon05]

Becuase they are afraid of rejection. Why lose interest?