Guys, do you try to do something impressive for a first date or keep things simple?

Question

zeitgeist057 · Accepted Answer

I say simple, but the real answer is "it depends". But I'm not much for "impressive dates", or at least I don't think in those terms.

I think all the "pomp" as @VIVANT puts it, is a distraction, when the focus should be on the connection. I think it's fine to have something fun to do, but that is a backdrop for the real business, which is getting to know each other.

It also depends how much time we want to spend together. A simple walk or a coffee or something like that gives opportunity to end quickly if the chemistry isn't there. But if it's someone I know I am interested in spending hours or even most of my day with, I am down for sometime more, like planning to go kayaking or paddleboarding together, a longer hike to the top of a mountain, or day at an amusement park (lots of time to chat and get to know each other when you spend hours in line). That might be more like the 2nd or 3rd date, though.

Guys, do you try to do something impressive for a first date or keep things simple?

I don't know, is a day at an amusement park, an "impressive" date? What makes a date impressive? Is it how much money you spend? For me, it's the person that either impresses me or doesn't, not the venue.

Some examples of first dates I've gone on:

1. coffee or food shop

2. swimming hole

3. hike

4. make a meal together (typically lunch or dinner)

5. party with friends - (more of an inviting her, but spending time at the party both together chatting and separate with others)

6. Drink (s) at a pub, playing billiards if they have a table

7. paddleboarding, kayaking, or surfing. I guess I've had a few dates where the theme was "sports activity/instruction": martial arts, rock climbing, tennis, workout, &c.

DJB72 · Accepted Answer

Always simple. Daytime, not evening.

From 3rd date I'll offer to cook for her. Cooking relaxes me and unless I'm making something complicated - because I like it, not to impress anyone - I'd invite her to come over so I'm cooking with her there. That way I can be certain her taste is taken into account when seasoning the food and I can time it so there's a decent gap between putting ingredients into the mix and the food being ready. Glass of wine, music quietly in the background and easy conversation flows while you're preparing food.

VIVANT · Accepted Answer

Simple. I hate making a big deal out of stuff when you don’t even know each other had if you like each other that should he white enough bc it’s really exciting to get to know a person you are into. Save the big deal stuff for when things get boring 😂

when a guy tries to be extra I just feel like it’s what he does and it has nothing to do with me. I know a lot of guys treat dating as a number game, so that’s how it’d feel

we dk each other. What people should do initially is just plain old getting to know one another. No pomp.

That’s my opinion so I keep things simple simple simple myself and I prefer he do the same and, if it’s too simple for him, we’re not a good match.

literally just go for a walk down no money. Just talk or walk in silence absorbing each other energy. That’s really, the only kind of first date I want.

people make a big deals about sex altering your view of a person but any extra stuff can alter your view bc it’s not based on the person but the chemical dumping firm the excitement you get from “stuff”

if I and or he can’t be content in each others company for an hour without being distracted and artificially stimulated by sex or drugs or alcohol or objects or spending money or big blow out, then we’re not clicking for the right reasons and I’m really not interested in getting to know him.

If the weather is nice, that’s all the gift you need.

Hawkes_Lady · Accepted Answer

I would prefer a simple, casual first date. A nice, but not break the bank restaurant (think Olive Garden or other casual sit down restaurant). Also preferably not to loud as I want to be able to talk and get to know you and that can be hard in a noisy venue.

DannyUk2017 · Answer

Simple as i like to "observ" how things go first, how you are, how you behave, to get to know what you like/dislike, to see if you're in to me and relationship or not, just to test the limits and boundaries without backfiring on me, you know best things are kept in small portions...😉🤫

coachTanthony · Answer

I always do this one thing that is super impressive. Ask good questions about her and shut up.

petitedollbabee · Answer

I’ve always preferred guys who keep things simple. I don’t want you to impress me with a big flashy date. The date should be simple, and you should be impressing me with your personality and conversation skills 🥰

RonanAN · Answer

My first dates are always an activity of some kind-a visit to the park, zoo, museum, botanical garden, an interesting even that's in the town etc.
If it's someone I already know, it's usually more involved to match their likes.

I don't like dinner dates, and I won't ever spend to impress.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I am engaged now, and we are living together. When I was dating, I generally chose a nice restaurant with good food, good service, and convenient location. It is an appropriate first date for my generation, and the venue was good for having extended discussions. Price for dinner plus a drink for each of us was $80-120.

Jemini_Crocket · Answer

I think simple is the best way, but I gotta see that he's involved and serious about it. I still cannot decide upon the best date location (it's definitely NOT the movies), but going somewhere where the scenery is nice while doing something that brings you closer physically is perfect. Good snack or something sweet is big bonus.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Most guys only want sex. Outside that, they are usually clueless when it comes to dating.

MiddleAgedClimbee · Answer

Keep things simple would be my move in this day and age (not dating/I'm married)). Simplicity actually seems to stand out in my opinion these days.

Jennz6 · Answer

Guys usually want a HJ or a BJ and that’s not the way to impress a girl 👧

smilelots · Answer

I just try to be me if she likes me for that great because 99.9% of the time that’s who I am me the way I talk the way I act how I eat how I dress if you fall in love with me seeing me as being myself, that’s a great start, and I want my day to be her self. I have been out on dates in the past where the women tried To be something they’re not, and it just doesn’t work long-term so be yourself man or woman you’ll have a much better chance with the right person

lorenzomichael · Answer

I used to take my first dates to a nice lunch then off to either the observatory, a museum or the aquarium. There was never no pressure or an awkward moment. only moments of opportunity. My dad always told me the best things are the simple things. So that is what I passed on to my son. Movies are played out you spend all that money to be alone with her in the dark and be quiet. I want to get to know her I couldn't do that in a darken movie theater.

CaliAttorneyGuy · Answer

Whenever I tried something impressive in the past, it never worked. I’m too old for that now and don’t have the motivation to put in that kind of effort with a girl I’m just barely getting to know. I have no problems with doing something nice for a girl after we have been dating/hooking up. But I will no longer do it at the beginning to try to impress a girl.

Billlewis · Answer

If she's exceptionally attractive, I'll try to.

femalepretzelmaker · Answer

I'm not here to entertain you or juggle or jump through hoops for im here to be fruitful and multiply, I'm here to love you and provide you with all our needs not our wants and you are here to be my light my purpose my energy and most importantly give life to our offspring

DextroShade · Answer

Considering that 1 in 3 women admitted to going on dates with guys they don't even like just to get a free meal, it would be really stupid for a guy to spend a lot on or put a lot of effort into a first date before he even knows if she likes him. Wasting money on girls who don't like you is simping.

exitseven · Answer

I try to do something special without looking like a big showoff

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I like to impress the girl on the first date.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Simple till the third date. The first two are to see if she is into me or just into getting a free meal at a nice restaurant.

sheikalana · Answer

I would like to keep it simple. When me and my husband went on a first date I wore something a bit more formal but looked the same as I always do. A little bit of makeup and a nice perfume and didn't try to say anything to impress him.

Anonymous · Answer

Haha, nowadays girls are so unworthy and useless that I’m just looking for someone who can give something to my life that’s meaningful and help me build instead of expect to get taken care of.. attitude is everything. So no I don’t try to impress I go strictly to get to know. And if that’s a turn off, it’s definitely not meant to be.

Philyouup · Answer

Keep it simple don’t over inflate expectations because you can’t keep them up

BoobMan · Answer

I like to keep it simple and do a date where we have plenty of time to chat and get to know each other in a relaxed atmosphere. The ENTIRE point of the first date is to get her excited about a second date.

ZackBan · Answer

Always simple since first date implies she's relatively a stranger and until I know she's cool I won't put unnecessary effort into activities with her

catarecute · Answer

i would say simple is good. wen i start dating again i want to do something simple in a date like go chill at the park and eat MacDonald.

Constatine · Answer

Don't be too crazy on the first date.. it will be too difficult to top this on the second and third date 😁

Anonymous · Answer

from what i've read, if you acted slightly off on the first date, guys will venmo asking for their money back lol so yeah, i highly doubt they're trying to impress girls on the first date anymore.

Avicenna · Answer

You want to make it enjoyable. it really depends on you and the person you're trying to get to know better and what you each like.

Massageman · Answer

Mini-golf in summer, perhaps. Movie any time, plus a bite to eat.  If you share a common interest, maybe focus on that: car show, local concert, etc.

Belgie · Answer

Simple. She has to like me not the shiny shiny.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I try to keep things single, a movie or dinner.

strateguy632 · Answer

simple just take a walk in a population place.

BourbonAndBacon · Answer

First date is a coffee date and no exceptions. $10 max.  I was going out on 3 first dates a week.

Fireguy17 · Answer

keep it simple, it is much more relaxed then, and it is much easier for both parties to be themselves, no/less pressure that way.

Vegasrunner · Answer

Always want to keep it simple, as a man you're going to have lots of opportunities to meet women so you don't want to invest to much w/ one you just met.

Fabiloso · Answer

Simple but a bit of me in there somehow so to be impressive.

RavVid · Answer

Frankly it depends on how hard she makes me. Harder = more impressive first date.

Anonymous · Answer

I would prefer simple first, but a must thing to do should be done (like act of gentleness, etc)

RingOfFire · Answer

Used to go all out for first dates. Now I like to keep it simple. I save the special dates for later.

msc545 · Answer

A little bit of an impressive first date, although not a huge overstep. It has to be a little bit impressive or I'm going to be thought of as being cheap.

Drumlin2001 · Answer

I'd always go simple. on first date. Maybe go big on 2nd or 3rd date.

zagor · Answer

Keep it simple. A first date is to find out about each other; if she expects me to put on a big show to impress her I'm dating the wrong girl.

DARKCLOUD1945X · Answer

Personally, I think slow is better to get to know the person. You have plenty of time for other things

Marklaw12 · Answer

Keep it simple always to avoid embarrassing yourself. Also, always be yourself.  "There's always somebody for everyone"

jojoisaskingyou · Answer

Simple is best to begin with. It's hard to get to know someone when distracted by pomp and flair.

Forceinhand · Answer

I just try to be genuine and show her what I'm all about and what I find to be a good date.

MysticDevice · Answer

Always start out simple. And whatever happens, happens.

love_conquers_lust · Answer

It’s a first date, it’s already complicated.

MaxUsefull · Answer

not on the first date but my ex lived far away and the first time she came to the place where I live I paid for a 5 star hotel for her... I regret that

Sparkie460 · Answer

First date was always simple. Just get to know each other. I never pretend to be someone I'm not

Anonymous · Answer

Never dated but it depends on how much I care like if I want to try somewhere nice might as well make a date out of the situation

McKellar · Answer

I've done both. Nothing happens, nothing worked.

dragoblack · Answer

Keep it simple and someplace you both find fun or relaxing.

_RebelWolf_ · Answer

I am natural, I do not like fake behavior, I want the other person to be like that too.

Guardian45 · Answer

I try to keep it simple, but sometimes I can't resist trying to impress her.

Anonymous · Answer

Simple. Impressive must be earned not given. ⚔️

Anonymous · Answer

I keep it simple. I'm just trying to figure out if I even like girl. The most "impressive thing" I would do is pay for the date.

Anonymous · Answer

What about you? Do you try to do something impressive on a first date?

Anonymous · Answer

I believe first impression is the fake impression so I keep it simple.

rhertlin · Answer

Impressive

dolemite58 · Answer

keep it simple, girls feel uncomfortable when you try to hard.

Guys, do you try to do something impressive for a first date or keep things simple?

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I like to impress the girl on the first date.

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Guys, do you try to do something impressive for a first date or keep things simple?

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I like to impress the girl on the first date.

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