He said “I’ll end up liking you for nothing”?

[Anonymous]

I’m not looking for a long term relationship or anything casual. I even told him that I’m showing him red flags and he agreed.

I think he is someone I might like…but I just have a lot of trauma and personal hurt.

[davnerLeL]

The way I see things, he’s also NOT looking for something temporary with you. He doesn’t want to deal with the pain of leaving you if you guys ever get together.


Ask him about his past relationship if you want more insight.


Make sure he doesn’t have contact with his ex or whatever.


Ask him if you can take things slow, and just talk to him and see how things go.


If he wants to jump into a relationship immediately then try to understand his motives (usually he’s unconsciously trying to fill an empty spot in his heart that belonged to someone else if this was the case).


But if he’s ok with taking things slow and you guys just get to know each other well then everything seems fine.


Just try not to play around though, sure, you got options. But good guys almost always hate being an option.


It goes both ways.


As of right now it’s fine if there’s like another potential one. Just keep them a bit further away than an arms length though.


TLDR don’t commit right now, take your time, tell him this too. The right move to make depends on the circumstances. So if it’s fits what I said, then just consider it when makin your next move.

[Asker]

Who knows… he could just want sex. It’s hard to see a guys true intentions

[Asker]

That’s why I only want to be a guys placeholder until he finds what he wants. I don’t want to know about an ex or anything.

[Asker]

He ghosted me after our first meet up… I feel stupid… I ruined things

[RoseySarah]

Then let him go!

He clearly does not care and you pushed him away like you wanted to do!

Someone who cares would not say your nothing or for nothing. They would say then I'll like you and grow!

[Asker]

We’ve only been talking for like 3 days. I told him I don’t mind being a placeholder until he finds better.

I did try and push him away bc I feel he prob just wants sx.

[RoseySarah]

Ouch well your probably right but your also going at this dating all wrong.

No long term but no casual... But you need to value yourself and date!

Not be a place holder for some loser who gives you no value.

Your wonderful and special! Your the only you to ever live!

Your so valuable! Treat yourself that way and better dates will come around for you!

Take your time and be happy not a useless place holder for a fboy.

[Asker]

I appreciate it but my heart isn’t open to love and long term dating.

[RoseySarah]

Just quick being used and dumped? Won't that hurt it more?

[Asker]

No bc I set out what I want in the beginning. Being a placeholder is something I’m so used to… instead of me being so hurt by it I embrace it and just talk to guys as friends until they move on.

[RoseySarah]

My cousin does that she likes it til lsje get so regnant again and he dumps her

[Asker]

Oh nah, I don’t get pregnant

[Asker]

Why do you say he doesn’t care?

[RoseySarah]

Cause he really does not! It's how he says it and acts.
Like he will get hurt for using you boo whoo!
He is probably excited your like yeah go ahead I'm awful.
In his mind it's free slut! Just deal with my venting till I fall and you spread my legs!

Then dump me when I'm to clingy for someone else. You get while saying you have a girlfriend.

[Asker]

I honestly didn’t see it that way or read it that way. I felt like he may have actually wanted something … can I show you the text?

[Asker]

But I was afraid that’s what would happen

[RoseySarah]

Going to ask another question to show me the text?

Well text can be seen in many ways and I'm looking at it as you have value where as you both are not!