Why do some men pursue hard then pull back then pursue hard then pull back and repeat the cycle?

[Finfin1981]

[Still-alive]

He could be playing games as others say here but another explanation could be that he's the dismissive avoidant type. you can look that up if you like.

And commonly they date or get into relationships with anxious attached types. and they do this dance called the axious-avoidant dance where one pursues the other then the pursued person stops while the the other starts pursuing themselves. and the cycle repeats over and over until someone breaks up or ghosts or something. https://www.beselffull.com/blog/the-anxious-avoidant-dance-how-to-heal-this-unhealthy-relationship-cycle

[RavVid]

I saw a physchack last night that may be relevant. The fundamental point is men approach women. Not always true, sometimes women approach men but mostly so. That puts men in the position of being a supplicant and an adorer.

Immediately that knocks off a couple of points his market value.

The best thing a man can do is to invert the situation into being the supplicant/adorer.

Pursue hard/ pull back is a way of doing this. Thanks for the hint.

[MrCommodore]

Two possibilities

1. He is playing mind games.

2. Chases and then he doubts himself, depending on progress.

[Finfin1981]

Well when I text he normally replies straight away then asks me if we can talk on the phone instead or just calls me …

[MrCommodore]

Thats a good thing though? Like talking is better than texting, it doesn't sound like he is playing games or anything, he just isn't a fan of texting.

[Finfin1981]

Yeah sounds like he is just waiting for me to initiate to then ask to call … maybe a bit unsure.. he texted this morning saying have a lovely day …

[MrCommodore]

Based on what you've shared, I think he seems genuine and likes you. I think he might just be unsure as you said, maybe a tad nervous even.

[Finfin1981]

Yeah he definitely seems nervous and a bit unsure at times.. I hate taking the lead so much but with him seems I have to a bit and he almost seems relieved. Had a bad breakup apparently so is a little reticent now to not rush things which I’m happy with !!

[Fabiloso]

Recharging their confident prowl. If they kept it up for too long they won't perform their best and you'll have to figure out their code of dumbass in order to understand.

[Joshydavid25]

Probably trying to make sure he keeps your interest by not being predictable and seeming too available.. I guess it seems to be working a bit..

[OlderAndWiser]

Some guys just enjoy the hunt and not the kill.

[NathanDavis]

because they're not men yet... they're still immature guys

[Anonymous]

Because the woman is leading them or being too passive and not telling them he has no chance with her.

[FenixG45]

You're probably doing something that makes them pullback.

[spartan55]

Because the whole time you are doing nothing.

[Finfin1981]

That’s not the case here ! Lol

[Finfin1981]

I’m matching contact and initiating too

[spartan55]

Okay, cross that off my list of possibilities.

[Finfin1981]

I might go for rhe long distance guy instead now…

[Finfin1981]

He does ask to call me when I do text so likes to speak on phone but waits until I text at the moment

[spartan55]

I thought you were talking long distance guy the whole time.

[Finfin1981]

No there are 2 guys i like but long distance guy still my favourite this guy lives a lot closer though 😬

[spartan55]

Hmmm, long distance is always a long shot. Adjust your ratings accordingly.

[bededazzle]

for a number of reasons none good

[Longshank]

Possibly to get into your knickers

[Finfin1981]

No that’s you 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Longshank]

That’s true also! I’ll get my wish 😃

[Luckycharms12]

Fear getting hurt for a lot

[Finfin1981]

Hmmm? Really? So it’s a protection mechanism..

[thor_erikson]

it's a seduction technique called push pull

[Alex8736]

Mind games

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆