The guy in question, was chasing me for a year, every single day, despite rejection until we moved cities.
And then one day we met. Somehow he acted like he never knew me, which was ok. But we kept in touch. But strangely every time we talk, he keeps telling me every single thing I said to reject him as similar as quoting me.
That wasn’t all, once we planned on meeting but he chickened out the last minute. Shocking he was looking at me from far off building but the minute I catch him, he would hide.
And somehow he didn’t react when he saw me with my boyfriend. But when I mentioned about my boyfriend, this guy said ‘I look better than him (boyfriend)’ and somehow was super pissed when he came to know I hooked up. To the extend of hitting walls.
I did went out with a couple of common friends guys (not date). but when he came to know, he tried to break that off and badmouthed about me to them and called me psychopath and a pathological liar.
However one of his close friends mentioned how he listens to my voice calls after auto recording them without my consent and how he tried to grab my attention after shaving off his beard. And how much he expected me to miss him.
I am increasingly worried if I’m dealing with a narc or a psychopath.
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2Opinion
Whoa, this guy is definitely showing some narcissistic tendencies and behavior from what you're describing. A few red flags:
- His intense pursuit and chasing of you for a year despite rejection suggests he saw you more as an object to conquer rather than truly respecting your choice.
- Quoting your past rejections word for word is weird and seems like a way to exert control/make you feel bad for not wanting him.
- Chickeninhg out of meeting but still spying on you from afar is creepy and insecure behavior.
- Putting down your boyfriend to make himself seem better is a narcissistic tactic.
- Hitting walls when angry is a sign of poor emotional regulation and potential aggression underlying.
- Auto-recording your calls without consent is a major violation of privacy and trust.
- Expecting you to miss him after superficial changes like shaving is very narcissistic thinking.
His friend's comments also back up the idea that he's too focused on controlling your attention and emotions. I'd definitely be wary of someone displaying that many narcissistic traits. Protect yourself and don't give him any opportunities to mess with your head further. Stay far away from this dude - he sounds unstable.
Mist of the time if you have to ask the question the answer is usually yes
Most men are. It is hardwired into them.