Should I wait a month to go see him again?

[Candykanelove]

I've been friends with benefits with a guy for over a year now I saw him last week. And I really enjoyed it and I want to go see him again next week. Is that too much though? I don't want to be clingy, and I like giving him space. The last time I was over there he said if he's there I can come (sometimes he isn't home because he works a lot). I was thinking of waiting a month to see him. But I've been thinking about it and I don't want to wait that long.

So, would it be too much if I went again next week? After next week I won't go again until another month I just enjoyed the vibe last time it was nice.

[DaveJord]

So honestly, if this a just a pure friends with benefits situation, I would wait a month. Because the whole point of the friends with benefits situation is not to catch feelings. But the more time you spend together the more likely you will catch feelings. And it sounds to me that you probably already are catching feelings.

I will say this, if you are feeling this need to see him again, at least give it one more week. Really ask yourself if this is a truly friends with benefits situation for you. Or are you backsliding into something else. Best way to figure that out is to give yourself some time away from it.

Here is the issue though... were does this guy stand? Because for me, I would tell the woman same thing, because sex is sex. And I know friends with benefits never last so I would want to get maximum benefit from it. But at the same time, if I was catching feelings, I would want to see her more often. So, is it possible he might catch feelings?

Do you want him to?

If you want him to then go again and as often as you can. If you are catching feelings then go this weekend, but do not leave without telling him that you are catching feelings, and this will be the last time you come over, unless he feels the same.

If it is a true friends with benefits situation and that is what you want, and you are certain it is nothing more than that to you, then go as much as and as often as you want. But if you have to string out it to one month at a time, then yeah that is the best way to guard against ruining it.

[Candykanelove]

Just because I want to back next week doesn't mean I'm catching feelings. I enjoyed the sex is what I'm saying. I don't get why people always assume women catch feelings with friends with benefits. I like him yes but that doesn't mean I want to be in a romantic relationship with him. I'm saying the attraction earlier this week was nice between us. He seemed to be really horny and turned on when he saw me. And that's what I really enjoyed. Hence the reason why I want to go back next week.

[DaveJord]

Now that response gives me more information to give a better answer.

I am just saying, it's a slippery slope. If you really enjoyed the sex and that is where you want to keep this... then trust me, it will be just as great next month.

The more time the two of you spend together the more likely one of you will catch feelings. Usually, it starts with some level of denial before you accept that it is happening.

No, I do not think women are more or less likely to catch feelings then a man is, but again the more time you spend together the more likely one of you will. So, if the sex was that amazing, and you want to keep that going, then gap it out. That is my recommendation.

Think how much you want to do it again right now, do you think that feeling will be more or less a few weeks from now? For me it would be greater with week or two in between.

[Candykanelove]

Yeah, I get what you're saying but sometimes people aren't in the same mood as time passes. I said if I decide to go again next week I won't go again until another month.

[DaveJord]

Saying a doing are two different things. You go again this week, with the intent of not going again for a month... but once you go again that can change. You went back to bac week this time, what's the harm in doing it again?

I mean you can keep going every weekend if you want, eventually one of you will catch feelings or get completely bored with it. But you want to keep it exciting, then give a few weeks in between.

I still say waiting a week or two is best.

[Candykanelove]

You said I should wait a week or two if I go tomorrow that would be a week. And I also mentioned that after tomorrow I won't go again until next month.

[DaveJord]

Enjoy have fun, get the most you can out of it while you can. Nothing wrong with that.

[Billlewis]

Whatever you ultimately decide, this sounds like a very promising relationship, based on your description of it. I think you should sit down and discuss all the variables involved, such as your respective schedules, working/school hours, as well the distance between your home and his residence.

[Ironic_Method]

I like to see my friends with benefits as often as possible. My last one had a key to my place so she could show up whenever.

[bowenw]

See him whenever you want if he's available. I'm sure you will both enjoy it.