I think he’s avoiding me…?

[Anonymous]

He saw that I was walking behind him but I was a bit far though he started to walk down the stairs really fast and kept looking to the side of his shoulder until he went in to the restroom. I haven’t even spoken to him in a week and this is where I normally talk to him and I’ve recommended him a song and I don’t think I’ll ever know how he felt about the song. I completely give up. I feel so hopeless.

[Oliverlogan263]

Whoa girl, don't give up yet! That does sounds like some strange avoiding behavior though. Boys can be so silly sometimes. Here's what I think - he's probably feeling embarrassed or awkward about whatever is going on between you. When we like someone it can make us act shy and weird. I bet when he saw you coming he panicked and thought "oh crap, there she is!" and rushed away to hide. The shoulder checking is a classic "is she still following me?" move too.

Don't lose hope! He might just need a little more time to get over his nerves. I'd say don't directly confront him about it since that could make it worse. Play it cool for now - smile and say hi if you pass in the hall but don't push for a private chat. Let things settle on their own. Then try casually bringing up the song again in a low-pressure text, like "hey just wondering what you thought about that song I sent." Gauge his response before deciding your next move.

Boys can be so emotionally immature sometimes! But I have a good feeling he still likes you underneath the awkwardness. Give it some more time before writing him off completely. He'll probably come around once he stops freaking out so much. You've got this - don't let one silly boy's chicken behavior get you down!

[Asker]

He keeps side eyeing me in the halls and staring at me and when I look back he doesn’t look away. Does he hate me?

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm doesn't sound like he hates you if he's staring at you like that. Usually if a guy hates a girl he avoids looking at her altogether. My best guess is he's probably into you but is too nervous or shy to actually come talk to you. Some dudes get all awkward and don't know how to act when they start liking a girl.

The side eyes and not looking away when you catch him staring is a good sign though - it means he's checking you out and doesn't mind getting caught! I'd say next time you see him stealing glances, give him a little smile or wave to let him know it's cool. That might encourage him to come say what's up.

Or you could make the first move yourself - walk over and be like "what's up, you always staring at me or something?" in a flirty way. Get the ball rolling so he knows you're open to talking. He's probably just shy and needed a little push. Once you break the ice I bet he'll come out of his shell. So don't think he hates you - way I see it, he's definitely into you!

[Asker]

Well I do talk to him occasionally and I did recommend him a song but I haven’t spoken to him in a week. either way he’s always staring at me and I don't know if it’s for the good or the bad.

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, this dude is really hard to read! It's weird that he goes from staring at you a lot to also avoiding talking to you sometimes. If y'all were friends before I don't get why he'd be giving you the cold shoulder now.

Next time you catch him staring, maybe try waving like "what's up?" and see how he reacts. If he gives you a smile or comes over to chat, it seems like he's just shy. But if he scowls or walks away, then maybe he's actually annoyed about something.

The only way you'll really know what's up is by directly asking him. Even if it's awkward, be like "hey dude I've noticed you staring a lot, is everything cool between us?" And pay attention to both his words and body language. If he says yeah but won't make eye contact or something, then I'd give him space.

Don't lose sleep over this creeper though! You did nothing wrong by just being friendly before. If he wants to be weird and give mixed signals that's on him. Just focus on your other friends who are straight with you for now until this guy sorts his head out.

[Asker]

Thank you so much for your help. I understand, he’s a very shy and closed off person and either way I’m always the one who has to initiate the conversation anyways. But it’s just his stares and glances that get me, he doesn’t seem to look at anyone else that way so I don’t understand why he does so to me? Don’t get me wrong he’s absolutely so kind and respectful and I want to talk to him more, I’m just afraid he’s gotten annoyed by me.

[Jamie05rhs]

He's not annoyed by you. He likes you.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ah man, shy guys can be so hard to read sometimes. It does sound like he might have a little crush on you if he's always staring and doesn't act that way with other people. But I can understand why his behavior would leave you unsure too.

A few things that might help:

- Like you said, keep the conversations light and casual when you talk to him. Don't put pressure on him to open up if he's not ready. Just friend stuff like school, music, whatever.

- Give him little signals that you're cool with his shyness. Smile, be friendly, laugh at his jokes even if they suck. Let him know he doesn't need to feel nervous.

- He may just appreciate you taking the lead in talking to him. Shy guys love a girl who makes the first move! Don't feel like he's annoyed, I bet he digs that you put in the effort.

-Try not to overanalyze the staring too much. Easier said than done, I know! Could just be how he is.

Keep initiating contact in a low pressure way. Hopefully over time he'll come out of his shell a bit more. But don't force it either. I'm sure if you keep being cool with him, he likes having you around even if he's shy about showing it. Hope this helps - let me know if you talk to him again!

[Jamie05rhs]

@Oliverlogan263 You're a smart dude!

[Oliverlogan263]

@Jamie05rhs thanks bruh I try a bit

[Nikki1989]

Ignore him, move on. Men are everywhere.

[Asker]

It’s not easy

[DreamLife7]

Why are u harrassing him?

[Asker]

I’m not? How am I harassing him?