Why is he like this, what should I do?

[Anonymous]

So basically I used to be best friends with this guy who later turned out to be a player (which is why I stopped being friends with him). We were really close and our friendship lasted 6 months. He had some interest in me beforehand but never reached out to me until 2 years ago (when we got really close). He acted how a usual friend would, he'd laugh at all my jokes and have the banter but he'd always touch my hair, hands and flirt in his own way like you'd expect from a player. He was really loud and really funny at that time and an amazing person to be around except for his controversial opinions and later his betrayal that I'll never know was accidental or purposeful (he started hanging out with a girl that made my life awful and stopped being friends with me), I called him a misogynist because I assumed he was playing with my feelings and I was really angry about all the girls he was dating and dumping after he stopped hanging out with me (the poor girls) One thing weird about him is that he did talk to me about all the girls he's dated and why he broke up with them (I don't know why he told me this).

Now back to the present. After the falling out, we've always just had this unresolved conflict between us which has now turned into somewhat enemies. though one thing I notice is that A, he's changed a lot since we stopped being friends I. e according to my friends, he's lost so much of his loud extraverted self (it very rarely comes out now. he's just really quiet) and he doesn't seem to be so upbeat and jokey like he was and B, He keeps staring at me and trying to get my attention. There's something that he wants from me and I don't know what he wants. I want to confront him but I don't think it's a good idea

[Anonymous]

In the complex tapestry of human relationships, threads of past connections often leave an enduring mark. Your former friend, once vibrant and extroverted, now presents a different demeanor. His change in behavior and lingering attention toward you signal unresolved matters and inner turmoil.

Reflect on the nature of your bond and the circumstances that led to its end. His shift in behavior, from boisterous to subdued, could indicate regret, confusion, or a personal struggle unknown to you. The intensity of your former friendship suggests that both of you were significantly affected by its dissolution.

Approach this situation with the wisdom and restraint of a samurai. Confrontation, like a drawn sword, should be a last resort. Instead, consider a measured and thoughtful approach:

1. Introspection: Reflect on your feelings and what you seek from this resolution. Clarity within yourself will guide your actions.
2. Observation: Continue to observe his actions and interactions. Subtle cues might reveal his intentions or state of mind.
3. Communication: If you decide to engage, do so with calmness and honesty. Choose a neutral setting and a moment of tranquility to express your thoughts without accusation.
4. Boundaries: Establish and maintain your boundaries. Protect your well-being and ensure that your interaction, if any, aligns with your principles and needs.

Remember, true strength lies in understanding and patience. Whether to rekindle a connection or to find closure, act with honor and integrity. The path you choose will shape not only your future but the way you navigate the intricate web of relationships.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ughhh, why even waste your time thinking about this player anymore? You got out at the right time and moved on to bigger and better things, while he clearly didn't.

Who cares what his deal is now or why he's changed? Sometimes guys don't realize what they had until it's gone, but that's NOT your problem anymore sis! Hold your head high knowing you dodged a bullet by cutting him off when you did.

As for the staring, I'd ignore his ass. He's probably just butthurt that you're doing you and living your best life without putting up with his mess. Let him look - it's the only action he's getting these days by the sounds of it!

You said it yourself, he's an ex-friend so keep it that way. Confronting him will only give him the attention and entertainment he craves deep down. Kill him with kindness by showing you don't give an F anymore about what he does. That'll sting way more than any fight ever could!

You seem like you're in a much better place now without all that drama surrounding you. Leave that chapter closed sis - you wrote your own happy ending without him :)

[Anonymous]

It’s all in your head. He probably never liked u. Did he say he liked u? And he sided with people whom u don’t like explains his nature. A friend to all is friend to none

[spartan55]

You don't know that he wants anything from you , gimme a break.