Invited crush over but he said yes and then cancelled? why?

[Anonymous]

I invited my crush to watch a show with me on Friday and he said he’s down and sounded enthusiastic about it. However on Saturday midday he messaged saying he’s not feeling well and wants to stay in. He doesn’t make any attempt to reschedule and hasn’t since texted me. I have been the one who generally messages him first so I don’t wanna over impose and Text him again asking if he is feeling better or not. Question is, is he lying about being sick to get out of hanging out with me? If he is, why did he say yes to begin with and change his mind in 15 hours?

[_Maya_]

Wow you are seriously insecure. He told you exactly why he changed his mind. He was sick. Why do you automatically go to "he is lying to me" mode? It is very apparent that you have zero trust if you don't even believe that he is sick or doesn't feel well when he says so. I get that you are not happy you don't get to see him but there is a very unhealthy level of distrust going on here. You relationship is not going to last if you can't trust that when he says he doesn't feel well that he doesn't feel well. To jump to him lying to get out of seeing you after he said he wanted to just shows that you don't trust him. Sorry to be blunt but it is the truth. That is something you are going to have to work on or this relationship will eventually be over.

[Asker]

He made a pass at me the weekend before and I stopped him saying I don’t casually hookup: and he said he isn’t looking for a relationship. But I was still open to getting to know him. Which is why I’m wondering if he’s just lying to not hangout with me because I rejected his hookup offer once.

[_Maya_]

While anything is possible you shouldn't automatically assume he is lying because that means any potential relationship is going to fail. Now if he keeps making excuses in the future then he might very well be lying but to distrust from the start is not a good idea.

[Asker]

The issue is since he cancelled, I don’t want to come across as too needy and ask him again. I want to wait for him to reschedule but if that was an excuse, I don’t wanna sit for weeks hoping to get a message from him planning to reschedule.

[DishLady]

He changed his mind or actually got sick. Don't dwell on it. Don't give him any extra importance. Just move on with your life.

[OlderAndWiser]

We don't know ANYTHING about him and we know NOTHING about you, so how could a stranger to the situation possibly answer this question?

Maybe he was sick. Maybe he is not into texting. Maybe he has a girlfriend, they argued on Thursday night, he talked to you on Friday, and Saturday she came to his home and jumped his bones to make up. Maybe he got a "better offer" Friday night. Maybe he is in a committed relationship, made a mistake in responding to you, and backed out before it was too late. Maybe he reflected on the situation and decided that your approach was too forward.

Shall I continue?

[Asker]

He’s single and he tried to hookup with me the weekend before. That narrows down a lot of the maybes in the list

[OlderAndWiser]

Send him a message that simply says, "Hope you are well. If you are still interest in meeting up, let me know."

[HusamRocks]

Have u considered that he might be honest about not feeling well

What u should do is to text him wishing for him to get better soon and that u look forward to reschedule if he's still interested 👍🏻

[DarkLegacy]

Perhaps he had a better offer

[Asker]

No he didn’t

[DarkLegacy]

LMFAO!

[spartan55]

@asker
And how would you know, that?

[Asker]

Just believe me on it, he didn’t.

[spartan55]

CSI Anon