Is he too polite or he is looking for some backup?

[Anonymous]

A random girl recently added my boyfriend on ig and she asked him if he has girlfriend and he told her he has and said sorry.. she asked him for s*xting to which he denied , said sorry and asked her if he hurt her feelings.. later she insisted more and sent her nud*s upon which he agreed.. he told me that he thought it is any of his friend pranking on him which is why he agreed for s*xting...

he is not very good looking and i am the best he can get... but i don't know if he will choose me even if he gets better looking girl... please give your opinions on this.

Updates

+1 y

she also asked him.. if he agrees that she looks hot.. to which he replied he can't say all this as he is committed..

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that situation seems kinda fishy to me. A few things that stand out:

- Any random girl adding your boyfriend should have been a red flag. Most guys know to be careful accepting requests from people they don't know.

- When she asked if he had a girlfriend, he could have just said yes and left it at that instead of giving an explanation.

- Claiming he thought her nud*s were a prank is a lame excuse. Most dudes would shut that down right away out of respect for your relationship.

- Even if he thought it was a friend, why engage in back-and-forth s*xting at all? That's crossing a major line.

- Saying he "can't say" she looks hot because he's committed is still acknowledging she's attractive. He should have just ignored that question.

To me it sounds like he was leaving the door open a crack in case things went further with this girl. I'd be careful trusting him at his word since his actions don't align. A truly loyal boyfriend wouldn't entertain that kind of behavior, looks aside. If I were you I'd have a serious talk and see how he plans to earn your trust back. Proceed cautiously from here on out.

[integrale77]

The way I read that if I was your guy is: -

Girl- are you single?
Guy- sorry I'm not
Girl- you want to chat anyway?
Guy- sorry I'm in a committed relationship (my girlfriend would kill me if I said different)
Girl- I can send some nudes?
Guy- sure (can't turn down some free porn I can pass off as random unsolicited nudes from a random girl)

I'd say he's doing the right thing not being drawn into actively cheating on you and maybe he feels his ego being flattered with some attention especially if you don't rate his looks too high

[MadinaHasABensheer]

Even ugly guys still desire women who are not their partner. I the feelings of lust and desire never disappear. But I think, he’s keeping it open. He could stop the sexting if he thinks it’s one of his mates, but he won’t because he doesn’t think it’s one of his friends. Just imagine sexting with your friends thinking it’s a prank. You think you’d continue?

[DishLady]

You’re so modest… what part of your story implies that he’s looking for backup?

[Asker]

sorry i didn't mention everything as it will become too long... 1. he told me he is going to sleep and stopped replying but he was actually talking to her
2. he had to go out for work which he cancelled and continued talking to her.. and he had no reason for cancelling
3. obviously s*xting
4. we have been in a relationship for almost 2 years now so why else would he continue talking to a unknown girl who is continuously flirting and asking him to breakup

[DishLady]

I don't think you have to "*" the word sex on this site... Folks are so buttoned up about the most surprising things and yet asking about things that are so outrageous... SIGH...

1. Ok... talking is not f-ing. if it bothers you that he speaks to other people then dump him and move on.

2. Ok, this one is at least one clear red flag.

3. WHO are you saying that he's sexting here? It doesn't make any sense.

4. So he's being tempted away from you in other words -- finally a clear statement. He's an idiot... Please dump this guy and move on.

[Asker]

1. talking to other people don't bother me... but lying to me just to talk to her will bother me obviously... we were already talking when he told me he is sleepy but wasn't actually

[BadApple69]

Many guys just like the attention. We like it when girls show us attention, even when it’s not our girlfriend. This is normal guy behavior. This girl on the other hand is either a prank or a scammer. Why else would she pick your boyfriend out of the blue. this is not normal girl behavior.

[spartan55]

You are a terrible person. Breakup with your boyfriend, he deserves better.

[Asker]

why do you think so?

[spartan55]

"he is not very good looking, and I'm the best he can get" why would you ever say that about your boyfriend?

[Asker]

because that is true.. i am his first girlfriend and he has never got any other girl.. i said yes to him only because of his efforts of getting me for so long. after saying yes to him i found out that he was also trying on other girls at the same time but since he stopped talking to them after relationship so that was not a problem anymore.. and now after all this i am wondering he would still choose me if he got any other better looking girl.. and i never bring up this thing that he is not as good looking

[spartan55]

But how could he get a better looking girl if you claim you are the best he can get?
So you believe this because you were his first girlfriend? That's terrible logic.

[Asker]

look i don't think that just because he is my boyfriend i have to think that he is the most beautiful person i know... he is not and that does not bother me that is why despite of me thinking he is not as good looking i am still being with him.. it was one of the reasons why i had taken so long to say yes.. but now since i did it can't bother me coz i myself chose his personality over his looks... my statement here clearly wasn't to highlight his looks but the concern that for once he got another random girl flirting with him and he got involved into it.. so it could be a possibility that he does't actually love me but is being with me just because till now i am the prettiest girl he got... by the way that stranger was more beautiful than me.. so this brings the confusion whether he would still choose me if he got a better looking girl in future

[spartan55]

Wow... it's hard to believe people like you are in society

[Asker]

i think it's hard to explain people like u who are not really understanding and are sitting to judge you

[spartan55]

I know you're not that complicated.