Small break? Help pls?

[Anonymous]

I have noticed some mix signals coming from friends with benefits/ coworker guy friend. Anyway he opened up abit about what's going. Saying he has been feeling abit off tbh, he explained with work, what he has been doing with friends and family aswell. And then said, it’s not your fault but just been feeling like a need a little space just so I can get some me time. So we are still hanging tomorrow but after that he said he wants a small break. I choose to respect his decision.

Just wondering, what does he mean by "small break" could some clarify maybe how long this is. I also have noticed myself I am gaining feelings for him.

[Oliverlogan263]

Uh oh girl, this "small break" stuff can definitely be confusing in a situation like yours. A few thoughts:

- When a guy says "small break" he usually means like 1-2 weeks of little to no contact. Just to recalibrate and get his head straight.

- But you never really know for sure with these things. Could be his way of distancing without fully committing either way.

- Does sound like he's feeling unsure or overwhelmed since you went from coworkers to benefits. Added stress.

- I'd give him the space, but maybe check in after a week if you don't hear from him. Just to ask how much longer he thinks the break will be.

- In the meantime, pursue other options. Don't just sit around waiting if he leaves you hanging for too long.

- And really consider how you'd feel if he decides the break means just staying coworkers again. Protect your heart!

Ugh I know it's rough. Hope he sorts his head out fast and the break is just a blip. But don't let him string you along on the back burner too long, girl! You deserve better than that.

[Iron_Man]

You can’t have a relationship, with friends with benefits it never works out

[Asker]

Then why he did ask for a small break and not just ended it straight away.

[Iron_Man]

Because he gets free sex, he wants more of it later

[HollyK21]

Here’s the thing — you are catching feelings, which was going to inevitably happen because as women we can’t open ourselves emotionally to men, have sex with them and still remain detached as they’re able to. We aren’t wired that way. So with this in mind, you need to be honest with yourself about what can truly come next for you and him.


He asked for a break, which means spending less time together. Whether he’s genuinely too busy or just trying to create some space (if he can tell you’re getting attached) is unknown. In any case, this is something you can either be ok with and accommodate by waiting however long until he’s ready again, or close that door altogether because you have some semblance of self worth and won’t be on standby for casual sex. It’s your call.

[Nikki1989]

A friends with benefits and a co-worker?

That is a disaster in the making.

[strateguy632]

here it means a week so dump him.