Do men get scared of intense love?

[Anonymous]

So I'm not the codependent needy type, but when I love, it's very fierce. I do offer independence and support though. I've been single because I'm working on my weight (down 25 lbs.) And I just want to be the best I can be.

It's rough because I just want a man I can make love to, cook for, listen to him, make his life easier, yeah I'm a simp and I don't care. I just wanna give someone my everything but I'm selective. I lovveeeeee to pour into someone I do hold back though because I feel like I might scare a guy off or get taken advantage of. I feel like I may have ruined a chance by holding back, because I was scared to go all in.

[sage2021]

I remember that when my last boyfriend first met me, I was a surprise to him because he wasn't looking to fall in love with anyone.
We lived in the same apartment building and that's how we met. I wasn't looking for a relationship either. Far from it.
But after we started to get to know each other a little bit, I would hear a knock on my door and it would be him. He would find the silliest excuses to see me. Like one time he cut his self shaving and came over to get a bandaid for his cut. He'd be all nervous and left right after he put his band-aid on.
But after weeks of intense conversations and laughing so hard together he admitted he was falling in love with me.
The way he explained falling in love with me was like he had fallen off a mountain cliff and there was nothing to hold on to on either side to stop him so he just kept falling.
Then I guess he needed some to think about this whole falling in love thing which remember I was a total surprise that popped up into his life.
So, he did stay away for about 4 days, I guess to think about this love thing he was feeling.
There's this old song and the jest of it was if you tie a yellow ribbon around the old oak tree it's because she's waiting for him and wants to see him.
So, I got some yellow ribbons and hung them on my door cause I knew he knew that song and what the yellow ribbons hanging on my door meant.
Yes, it was getting pretty intense and he did have to take some time out to think about it. I was just as intense mind you.
Then finally the knock on my door came. I knew it was him because he had a very distinctive knock, really gentle.
He was so happy to see me and I was so happy to see him again. We couldn't let go of each other and he said to me "God I've missed you"!!!
I'm telling you this because even if it does get intense it's ok to be that way with the right guy. Even if you don't hear from him for a while, doesn't mean he won't be back. He might be scared, but that's ok - do it afraid!! But do it.

Our relationship lasted 7 years. We lived together for the last year and a half then he died suddenly September of last year.
💔

[Altheavas]

You sound like a housewife material. Good qualities but maybe you should date outside of your nationality, don’t go for American men, Canadian men, … most men of the western and individualist mindset will be a waste of time for women like yourself. Like many here said, you might be too good to be true in their eyes. Women like you are valued in other countries.
However, hopefully not a narcissistic, a man with the mindset of a protector, and a provider might appreciate a woman like you. If you have to work too, and do all that you might get taken advantage of. Even with marriage that won’t save you, you’ll hear them saying you’re too good to me, I don’t deserve you, and then treat you miserably, and even says things that will hurt your feelings/self confidence etc. Why? Because they find comfort, a motherlike figure, they won’t leave you even if they don’t like you as much, if the they’re insecurity…! cause they have to do less, instead of leaving you they might trap you!
Be careful you’re valued!

[WodensGedriht]

Don't listen to her she wants to destroy white people.

[Altheavas]

lol @WodensGedriht 😂😂 What are you talking about? western is not all white, it’s a mixed pot. I don’t mean exclusively African countries, Africa is not made of black people only, what about the white Africans?
And there are some many European men who would appreciate women like you, so many handsome Asian men who would appreciate you!
American is not all white, since I have to specify 😂 generally for American a lot of them are the ones we don’t want to waste time with though.

[WodensGedriht]

No it's not a mixing pot you just want it to be.
White Africans rarely mix outside their race and aren't exactly treated well by the black majority since apartheid was overthrown by that terrorist commie Mandela.
Europeans are white and have been throughout all history. Why should we give up our race and turn into a giant melting pot so white people go extinct?
America was actually initially established as a white WASP country but became increasingly tolerant over time. Now that tolerance is coming to bite the white race on the ass.
I think Black Nationalists have the right kind of idea of carving out their own Nation within America. That's why they were allied with George Lincoln Rockwell's American Nazi Party.

[Altheavas]

That went left, you’re right!

So GAG how do I delete my comment!

[Universaldance]

Congrats on working towards your fitness goals. It’s such a great feeling so keep on doing what you do. I've got my fair share of gym goals that have boosted my confidence and esteem as well


And intense love would be incredible and I like to think I’m with you on this as you would also find me over-express my love towards someone especially if Im working my b*** off to live and lead a great healthy and quality life with them



From another pov, what would be scary is if the love is here for one day or a week or a month and gone the next. Aside from this, I would just suspect she’s trying to hide something


What makes it also as scary is that our identity/ego is so used to culture’s lack of love so one doesn’t look so desperate giving off love and chasing…or whatever else is depicted off of Hollywood and romantic titles. And that I feel affects the ideal image of what love is supposed to look like for so many people if traditional values are not already ingrained through parents/friends whether they are good examples or not


However, there are still great people who have done a lot of inner work and will appreciate someone who embraces their unique and passionate mannerisms of love. Just maybe a challenge to sift through such a saturated culture here in America where it might be taken for granted


If expressing your love is your thing I would just hope the person has a similar love language or you find out which love languages they are to express more respectively- and save you the efforts


Despite these opinions, anything is possible if you believe in your heart it is and are grateful that the most compatible men will present themselves abundantly around you. It is one of the strongest forces one could take advantage of

[ohsheeT]

I don't think that's called intense love I think that's called romantic and that's part of the relationship is when you're there for each other for me intense love is either when you're holding on to her tight and you're going slow motion and deep with your lips on her neck are you have her legs been up over her head so her knees are by her ears are you just giving her good pounding and you have that energy that you feel coming from the both of you that's intense to me LOL but what you're talking about is just pure love it's called commitment it's called I'm going to treat you the way you treated me and vice versa that's just called happiness and if you're working on your way right on I say good luck not even good luck I know you can do it but if you want to tone up really fast get rid of all the sugar Waters sodas all that crap in your life more vegetables more fruits and walk 30 minutes a day for 30 days as fast as you can get your arms moving breathe in through your nose only in and out through your nose only not your mouth that way you're getting pure oxygen throughout your whole blood stream and it will make you even think and become a lot smarter wiser because we all forget to breathe through our nose and that's where we get all our oxygen from the rest is just still there if you're breathing through your mouth but walk fast for 30 minutes a day and get your metabolism cooking that way it'll start losing weight on its own I like this question good job

[lightbulb27]

Too aggressive and he will back ofd. You are a giver, remember to take so he feels valued.

[Finchie40]

Honestly most guys’ want a girl that loves him that way , so the only problem you are having? , Is by you , assuming he doesn’t and holding back , which sadly a lot of girls’ and guys’ tend to do , thinking they are smothering to much. The key to finding a happy relationship is by being honest , and accepting someone the same way you want them to accept you , Not one person on this planet , is perfect , when you learn to accept someone’s flaws , they will more than likely accept your flaws , as long as you choose them the same way you want them to choose you. Most relationships fail because people are selfish and only think about what is best for themselves , they don’t consider their partners’ feelings , they just consider their own , pretty much making their partner feel like they are just a convenience, A relationship takes 2 people choosing each other over everything else in this world. To make the both of you a team to become 1 . Always remember what you can do to your partner? they can do to to you as well , If you want your partner to respect you? You need to respect them , if you want your partner to be loyal to you? You need to be loyal to them , if you want your partner to be honest with you? You need to be honest with them , it won’t always be perfect , but it more than likely will lean that way , if you stand by your partners’ side the same way you want them standing by yours. So find yourself a guy , that chooses you the same way you should choose them , Don’t get into a relationship with someone that you have to keep secrets from or lies from , You will never be happy if that’s the case. Set boundaries with your partner , and follow those boundaries together , not the other way around. Learn to make each other your top priority over everyone else in this world , Your friends and family should never come over your partner , if they do? DonMt be surprised when your partner does the same to you.

[Pegases]

I wouldn't say scared, but men and women don't seem to love the same. when a guy falls in love, it often means he's willing to protect you, and potentially die for you. that's a tough pill to swallow for many, especially if he's unsure if the woman he's in love with is worth dying for.

[Caroline91]

If it came down too it, I know my husband would die for me and our babies and I try every day to be worthy of him. I also have his back.

[ManInChains]

Men are scared of becoming so in love with a woman and then finding out she fucking cheated on him like all but 1 of my exes did to me. Due to that and other things, I’ve opted to stay single for almost 10 years now and counting. It’s nice not having to worry about being constantly cheated on.

[paledreams]

I wouldn't mind intense love if the woman is sane, gives me some space when I ask or without me asking space, and respects that in the relationship there's a dominant and submissive consensually, aspects :) in other words, the man is in charge consensually :) the woman submissive ♀️ - so as long as she's not crazy or whacky or thinks "any wandering eye is a freakout" no one wants a crazy lady or if they were a woman no woman wants a crazy boyfriend right?

[getpucksin]

If it's codependent and/or clingy, it becomes overwhelming. Every time you interact with them you feel as if you have to match every reaction and energy with the same reciprocated. It's extremely high pressure, and unless you have an extreme obsession with them, someone being too intense is never going to last. And obsession does not last forever anyway.

[Unit1]

A deredere girl! Just what I was looking for 😍

[Amy10223]

I always wondered about this. Some men are like that, afraid of too much emotion. I tend to hold feelings back and I need to improve on that. But once the feeling is mutual, I'm a real sop when it comes to romance.

[Anonymous]

Guys today know how flakey most women are. If it's too good to be true it most assuredly is. If a guy gives his heart easily it's probably worth nothing. I NEVER let my emotions overwhelm me. One thing life has taught me conclusively is my heart is as stupid as 💩.😆 that's why I ignore it.

So, scared? No. We logically back away when we see the trap.

[Ms_Facesitter]

It's okay to want to give them all that but make sure that the guy you pick is deserving. Just don't overwhelm him or look desperate when doing all that giving and you're good :)

[serious]

Yes of course men do get scared of intense love and especially so when a man thinks he doesn't deserve that much of love

[genericname85]

well men don't wanna mess with a girl that might slice their tires once they decide shit doesn't work out... men aren't scared of "intense love". they're scared of nutcases.

[Caroline91]

That’s funny…concise and to the point.

[DishLady]

A real man is fine with it, but there’s “intense love” (deep and lasting) and there’s psycho “velcro” clinginess that no one likes bc it’s creepy.

[pregananant]

Don't change yourself, find someone who appreciates you. You'll get opinions from people who don't prefer that kind of love, but you should listen to the people who want it.

[ProbablyClueless]

Sometimes. The intensity can be alarming if our connection doesn't warrant being as intense as she's being.

[Asker]

Yeah... it's better I pace myself I suppose lol

[ProbablyClueless]

It's all about context, but that would probably be for the best. I've dated women who you'd think I was their husband because of how they would talk to me, but we had only gone out once.

I remember this one girl who nervously confessed to me that she'd been talking to other men before our first date. We'd met on Reddit and been talking platonically for like 7/8 months before meeting in person. I guess in her mind, she thought things were more serious than they really were

[Anonymous]

Scorpio men definitely do not; they love the most intensely and deeply, along with Scorpio women. I can't speak for the rest of the zodiac signs.

[Asker]

I'm actually a cancer with scorpio rising and a chart ruled by pluto!

[Opinion Owner]

I'm a Scorpio woman with a Pluto-ruled chart, a Scorpio moon in the 4th house, “Cancers House,” conjunct Pluto. Cancer women, in my opinion, work amazing with Scorpio males, and I as a female often find myself intrigued by Cancer males. You guys are very devoted and love deeply.

[happyfoetus]

If I were a guy, I would choose you. In this world where all are begging for attention from everyone, it is refreshing to see someone who is selfless and authentic.

[Unit1]

This!

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't, because I'm very similar. I've only had feelings for one girl, and they were extremely strong. Unfortunately I haven't been able to replicate it.

[luvstoned4him]

As someone who loves really hard. I feel you on this

[WhitneySnow]

Some get scared by it, but some love it and will return your affection completely

[exitseven]

I was not afraid of it but I wanted no part of it.

[aquamarine321]

It depends on the guy, every guy is different, you say selective, but I’m sure you may select the wrong guy, that normal for girls to do

[Anonymous]

The right kind of love is scary in all the right ways.

[WodensGedriht]

Being a female "simp" isn't exactly a bad thing. Pretty sure Japanese coomers have an entire trope around that called "Yandere".

[Alex-Snow]

Good job on loosing the weight. I do not know why they would be scared.

[stratford]

Not when it comes with intense sexual intimacy.

[moneymagnet24]

Yeah I get scared of intense love...
Usually intense lover don't talk practical n get sad easily.. I have experience.

[clampfan101]

It’s what I want more than anything else. True love tamed by nothing but religion.

[MyBrainsInsaneReign]

Men don't get scared of intense love.

Men get scared of intense women who can't stop talking about love.

[NathanDavis]

I fear no teeth...

[Caroline91]

What about dentures? Lol

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 those don't clinch or close automatically and unexpectedly... right?

[Caroline91]

Hmmmm... Hadn't ever thought of that... but I suppose I could engineer some...

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 oh, an engineer... interesting

[Caroline91]

@NathanDavis a writer, so I can be anything I imagine...

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 what a coincidence... I'm a prolific dreamer myself, and wrote down at least 3,000 of them into detail

how I wish I had never burned down to ashes all of my notebooks...

[Caroline91]

@NathanDavis On purpose?

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 yes... lol

that was a nice fire, that night... sort of a relief, as well (=

[Caroline91]

@NathanDavis Most of mine went the way of spontaneous combustion!!

[NathanDavis]

@Caroline91 that does sound ghostly...

or, was it by design...

[Caroline91]

@NathanDavis I couldn’t say although I have always enjoyed roasting marshmallows over a good bonfire…

[Tim2nice]

What kind of question is this?

[Dongie]

Come on with it. I say. Smoother me.

[Caroline91]

I’ll smother you @dongie…. got a pillow I can use? 😁

[Dongie]

Either way.😒🙄😏

[Crazzyyworld]

Poor don’t. Why not try them

[Anonymous]

Do women get scared of intense love?

[missindiana93]

Yes I think so.

[Anonymous]

You are a perfect man’s dream gal.

[jahaims]

No lol

[MatureMan40]

No, never!