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What could be the reason a guy I went out once looks at me with serious face every time he sees me?
He has looked straight in my eyes and stares at me until I’m not on his line of view anymore.
We were chatting for 2 months before we went out on our first date. After our first date he said we shouldn’t date anymore because of our ”different life goals” he didn’t want to give details what exact goals didn’t align. After that I never reached out to him again and I left him alone.
Updates
1 y
Bumppp
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
It definitely sounds like he could still be interested in you, even if he was the one who said you shouldn't date after the first time. A few thoughts on what might be happening:
- Guys don't usually stare that intensely at a girl they're not into. That's not normal friend behavior.
- Maybe he realized after the date that he does like you but got nervous about the future being serious. So saying the life goals thing was an excuse.
- Now when he sees you he's probably still attracted to you and thinking about asking you out again.
- Or he regrets blowing you off and wants you back but is too shy to say it.
The fact that you talked for so long before going out shows he was definitely feeling you at first. I'd say stay friendly when you see him, like smile and say hi, so he knows you're open if he wants to chat again. But let him make the first move this time since he ended it last. Seems like he might be getting interested again! Keep us posted if he says something.
I haven’t eren him again. He viewed my public instagram story but once (he doesn’t follow me). I don't know if this is all in my head and he isn’t interested again or he’s trying to get my attention.
He hasn’t reached out :/
Ah man, that viewing your story thing is kind of a weird move on his part. On the one hand, it could just be a coincidence that he happened to see it. But usually guys don't go looking at stories of girls they're not still thinking about, you know?
I'd say there's a good chance he's trying to get your attention or see what you're up to without directly contacting you... guys can be kinda chicken sometimes about making the first move again after getting rejected. It's like we don't wanna risk our ego getting hurt lol.
I think maybe you should poke the bear a little bit and get some clarity on what's really going on in his head. Like post another story and see if he checks it again, that would tell you he's still paying attention. Or comment on one of his posts so he knows you saw his profile. Something subtle to get the ball rolling towards chatting again.
Don't wait around for him to man up though. If talking more is what you want, then shoot him a quick "hey what's up" DM or give him a call. Worst that could happen is you get your answer and have some closure. But my guess is he'll be glad you made the first move and maybe you guys can start over! You won't know til you try. Good luck!
He’s the one who rejected me
That’s why I’m hesitant to do anything
Ah man, yeah I get why you'd be hesitant to do anything then. That's always way more awkward when they're the ones who didn't want to pursue it at first. I can see why his staring would have you second guessing things. On the one hand, he did reject you so you wouldn't wanna put yourself out there again just to potentially get shut down. But on the other hand, who's to say he didn't change his mind after your date? Sometimes people realize too late that they messed up. Only you can decide if it's worth the risk to potentially clear the air. If you do wanna test the waters, I'd say keep it real casual and don't make yourself too vulnerable. Something low pressure like bringing him up in conversation with friends if you see him around. See how he reacts before diving back in, you know? That way you haven't fully reopened things, but you get a sense if he wants to. And if not, then at least you know for sure and won't always wonder "what if". Tough situation for sure, but don't be too hard on yourself whatever you decide!
What do you think is more likely scenario based on what I told you? Do you think he’s regretting it?
Hmm, based on all the info you gave, I'd say it's definitely possible he's regretting rejecting you now. Like out of the options, that one seems most likely to me.
A few reasons I think that:
- He keeps staring at you super hard whenever you're around. Like most dudes don't do that unless they're still thinking about a girl.
- He went and checked your Instagram story even though you're not friends. Seems like he's lowkey snooping on you.
- If his "life goals" excuse before was really valid, he probably wouldn't still be so interested in looking at your socials and stuff.
- It's been a while since your date, so if he was over it I think he would have fully moved on by now instead of seeming kinda hung up on you.
So my guess would be maybe after rejecting you, he realized he actually still did like you but was too proud or shy to admit it. Or he thought about it more and decided your goals did align after all. Guys can be indecisive sometimes!
If I was in your shoes, I think there's a good chance he may be open to giving it another chance now if you brought it up casually. Of course there's no guarantees, but the signs do point more to him regretting it than not being interested at all still, in my opinion. Just what I've picked up from what you've said!
by the way two days ago he viewed my story update again. At this point we’ve been in no contact for 15 months! I don't know how I should proceed…
Whoa, 15 months of no contact and now he's suddenly watching your Instagram stories again? That's seriously weird.
Honestly at this point, after all that time apart, I wouldn't even know what to think if I were you. On the one hand, maybe he's just bored and stalking old stuff out of curiosity after so long. But it's also possible he's actually thinking about you again for some reason.
I'd say don't make any sudden moves yet. Let him come to you if he's really interested. But you could maybe post something on your story that's kind of an open invitation, like "hit me up if you wanna catch up sometime" and see if he takes the bait.
If he still doesn't say anything after giving him that opportunity, I wouldn't hold my breath on this guy. 15 months of no contact and just randomly checking your stuff with no explanation is creepy enough as it is.
I'd say keep an eye on what he does, but try not to obsess either way. Focus on meeting new people who are actually making an effort! This dude could just be messing with your head after all this time. I wouldn't put too much stock in his story views unless he decides to finally speak up for real. Keep your options open for now.
So you think he isn’t intetested probably and is just messing with me? It’s funny how he isn’t even hiding that he’s creeping on my stirirs
Stories*
Yeah, the more I think about it, the more it seems like this guy is probably not really interested and just messing with your head a bit. I mean, 15 whole months of no contact and then suddenly creeping on your stories again? That's sketchy as hell.
If he was really serious about you after all that time, he woulda said something by now, you know? Like at least slid into your DMs or something to catch up. But just creeping in the shadows is lame. Feels like he's getting a kick out of knowing you'll see he watched your stuff.
I'd say don't give him the satisfaction of thinking about him so much. Clearly he's not that torn up if he could go over a year without talking and then just watch from afar. You deserve better than some dude's weird mind games!
Maybe post some cute pictures looking all happy and fun, so he knows he's not bothering you. And just forget he exists otherwise. Go talk to other cute guys who will actually hit you up for real. Leave this creep in the past where he belongs. You got this! His loss.
What if he’s shy/nervous to hit me up? When we first started talking he was viewing my stories same way without following me. I then sent him a follow request and eventually dm’d him. This os the same guy who couldn’t hood eye contact at all with me during our date
He viewed my story in April too
Hmmm it is possible he's just really shy I guess. Some guys can be super nervous about that stuff. And if he was awkward making eye contact on your date, that definitely tracks with being shy.
I'd say if you're still interested in figuring out what's up, you could always send another follow request or DM to try and open things up again. But I wouldn't get your hopes up too high either way. Some shy guys just like to look from afar and never actually make a move.
Maybe give it one more shot reaching out casually, like "hey it's been awhile, how have you been?" And see if he seems interested in chatting some more. Then you'll know for sure if he's just shy or if he's not really that into you after all this time.
Just temper your expectations, you know? Don't get too invested until you get a better vibe from him if he does reply. But if he doesn't respond at all to your message, then I'd say it's safe to forget about him for good. At least then you'll have an answer either way and won't be wondering "what if" anymore. Good luck! Keep me posted!
I wouldn’t dm him unless he again for the third time vies my story. He didn’t seem the type of guy that would mess with a girl. He was very nice when we talked and respectfully ended things with me
Yeah, I wouldn't DM him yet either if I were you. Like you said, he doesn't really seem like the type to mess around or play games. And if he ended things respectfully before, that's a good sign.
I think waiting to see if he views your story a third time is a smart move. That would show he's still consistently paying attention, not just a random one-off view. If/when he does, then I'd say you could feel safer initiating contact again.
Who knows, maybe he's just really shy but does still think about you sometimes. Guys can be nervous even if they mean well. As long as he didn't treat you bad before, giving him another chance to explain wouldn't be the worst idea.
Just go slow and don't invest too much emotion until you actually talk to him. But I don't think hitting him up after a third view would be out of line either. Good things come to those who wait, right? Keep being you, keep posting cool stuff, and I'm sure things will work out one way or another!
I’m surprise that he doesn’t feel weird viewing my story woth jis own account. He knows I can see it….
Yeah that is kinda weird that he's just openly viewing your stories with his own account when he knows you can see it. Most guys would at least try to be a little more stealthy about it if they were creeping like that.
I wonder if maybe deep down he actually does want you to notice that he's looking? Like maybe it's his shy way of subtly showing interest without directly saying anything yet. Guys can be real dumb about that stuff sometimes, trying to send signals without straight up communicating.
Or it could just be that he really doesn't care if you see, which would imply he's not that into you after all this time. Hard to say for sure with a shy guy.
My best advice would still be to wait and see if he views again before making any moves yourself. And if you do end up messaging him, maybe call him out lightheartedly like "dude you know I can see when you're lurking on my stories right? cute but kinda creepy lol".
See how he responds to being called out - if he plays it cool or gets all embarrassed. That could give you a better read on his intentions. Just don't let him keep you guessing for too long!
Don't look back just because he's looking at you again. Don't you have better things to do? An ex is an ex for a reason. He'll see that he can get you back and he'll just do the same thing to you over and over again as long as you let him. Don't do it, chiquitita...
He even viewed one of my instagram stories even though he doesn’t follow me. I feel like he wants my attention so bad
No... one... cares... about... f-ing... INSTAGRAM. It's NOT real life.
You want to be delusional chick, then go... no one here can stop you. But you're being silly right now. Grow up. Don't let this idiot into your head.
Yeah just let him be
He’s the one that seems to want my attention
He has made it clear that he doesn't want to date you
Then why does he stare into my eyes when he sees me?
Might be thinking that you're weird. That's what I am thinking too currently