Being virgin at 20 among men is considered shameful, so there must be a reason why I still am, right? How can I understand what is wrong with me?

[Anonymous]

Hello!

As per title, I think there is something wrong with me but I can't tell what. I have a job, I have a social life, I go to university... a pretty normal lifestyle. And yet, I'm one of the Great Untouched, and on track to keep being one for years to come.

Whatever interaction I have with a girl will remain platonic no matter what (which isn't bad, more friends yay, but it's symptomatic of a bigger issue). If I hadn't grown up with many sisters and female friends, I would have thought the majority of women actively dislike physical intimacy. But it's a me problem, clearly.

There has to be something wrong with me, what is the best place to get advice? A psychologist? A counselor of some kind? My appearance isn't great, but I don't think it's THAT problematic, I look insignificant most of the time, mediocre on bad days, even pretty on good days. So there has to be something I'm doing wrong.

Thank you in advance!

[_Maya_]

Well it sounds like you just haven't met the right girl yet or possibly your approach to girls and the vibe that you give off. Without really knowing you and how you come off to people I can't really say what if is. There is a lack of context to that part of how and where you are generally meeting girls. Also what you say to them when you first meet and what their immediate reactions are. So it is very hard to say what the problem is but I don't think it is a psychology thing or something you need counseling for. I also don't think it is shameful either at that age. I have a younger sister that is about your age that is still a virgin and by choice. She hasn't met the right guy like you haven't met the right girl.

[SeriouslyNotSerious]

This! Exactly. 💯😊🙌

[_Maya_]

@SeriouslyNotSerious thank you 💜

[Asker]

Thank you for your thought-out reply! I will definitely rethink my first impression, that's something I hadn't thought of.

[_Maya_]

You're welcome

[SeriouslyNotSerious]

At twenty? That's ok! 😊 I know someone here older than that. And he's still looking for the "hymen" 🤣💎

[molonski2]

Shit mate , you are in " absolute prime time " by the time I was your age , man being a virgin was not even on the radar.. But where do you live? And what does your social life consist of?

I think its pretty old to be a virgin.. Country dependent I suppose , and area , social network , this is the key.

[thearchjoker]

https://datepsychology.com/are-27-of-young-men-really-virgins-and-why/

[missindiana93]

Nothing wrong with being a virgin. :)