Guy's Behavior

Is this postnut clarity in my boyfriend, how he really feels about me or both?

My boyfriend who is 5+ years older than me has made it a habit to try to control me by restricting our happy time dictating when and how we do the do. I would do as a women does and try to tempt him to get it started but he'll acknowledges it as if he's interested but never follows through. It makes me feel like I'm some 304 trying to get his attention but the whole time he's faithful and loyal to someone else. As a result I my s drive "for him" is very low. He's told me he likes to be dominant so I try to let him but he just says the same stuff and does the same positions. Anyway I don't mind that he's pleased in the end it's really what happens right after that makes me not want to do him again. He'll toss stuff to me and at me like the rag or bed sheets / pillows at me face. If I don't end up finishing which is often the energy he gives off when he responds is likes it more of a me problem but he'll try better next time. He keeps making promises of it being better the next time and how all he wants to do is please me and how he wasn't even close but suddenly as I would get into it head get too into it. Could this be due to insecurity and how do I address it or is he just an ahole
Is this postnut clarity in my boyfriend, how he really feels about me or both?
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