Can men seriously not control their lust/sexual desires?

Question

Why do some men act like they are animals who can't control their desires enough to even just avoid looking at women? Like I truly believe men can control their creepy side but they are choosing not to or maybe its really hard to? I could possibly be lacking empathy for men not fully understanding if they seriously cannot control it.

If men love when women dress modest then why is there this assumption that women wearing revealing clothes is for mens attention?

OneViewpoint · Accepted Answer

Why do religiots actually want women to "dress modestly". Because they are the stunted growth personalities who can't control their sexual urges and lose their little minds when they see a woman bare some skin. So their answer is to blame women for their own lack of self control are demand that the women "cover up". Fuck off!

Personally, I don't get excited over a woman showing some leg or cleavage or going topless or nude at a beach. Been there done that. Yawn. Pour me another glass of wine. Nice day isn't it? I mean sure, I appreciate the female form and the feminine vibe. But do what you want. I couldn't care less if you want to go braless in a t-shirt and flip flops on weekends. I'm not gonna lose my mind over it. No woman ever demanded that I wear a suit and tie constantly. The opposite actually. I'm usually over dressed for the crowd.

The only time I think about it in a sexual way is if we are involved / dating and you are putting out sexual overtones. Yes, I will pay attention and let you know that I get the message. We'll both be sweating heavily later. Other than that, it's just chillin, another day in paradise.

matchrestore · Accepted Answer

I don't understand it. As a nudist I can see a fully nude woman and not immediately start lusting over her. At most I might register that she looks attractive and move on but I'm not going to be oogleing her or be aroused by her unless there's some obvious sexual context to the nudity. It's 100% something that men can control. I swear they just choose not to.

Crimsyjo · Accepted Answer

I do believe they can and it's a matter of how they are raised, education, the society around them and ultimately a choice. And because it's a choice means they absolutely can control it if they truly want to. It's fine to get a "she's cute" thought flick through the mind but the behaviour that follows? I've heard men say "what a slag" (defense cos they think she's pretty but out of their league). Or they will wolf whistle or say nice tit's or something that's rude and uncomfortable for the woman. Or they can flirt charmingly. Or just smile. Or do nothing at all. Just let the brief acknowledgement pass. These are all in the control of the man.

And women too. a lot of women were raised to control their behaviour to not attract "bad" men or appear ladylike etc but women too these days are choosing to not "control" themselves sexually. So it goes both ways.

Genie23 · Accepted Answer

They can and some of them do. I know some young straight guys in my life who never talked to me about women in a way that would make women feel objectified or gawked at women because they respect women, so they instantly look away if a girl is adjusting her clothes or something and offers jacket to cover when it's cold out there. Those who say it's in our nature to stare at women they find attractive and make comments are simply choosing not to control their behaviour that makes women feel uncomfortable.

SotiCoto · Answer

I'll simplify this as much as I can:
People (not just men) are usually on autopilot. That autopilot is mostly formed of biological instincts and conditioned habitual responses. Hypothetically speaking people should also be able to operate on a conscious level and deliberately think things through...
BUT the catch is that it is slower.
So when men encounter a woman whose appearance appeals to them, or if they notice some unusual movement in their peripheral vision, they will start to look. Self-control isn't about whether they start to look or not, but how quickly they can intercept it and stop doing it... if they even stop at all.
Some men might be able to intercept it before anyone even realised it was happening.
Most will steal a glance but might not even turn their head.
Some guys will just straight up stare for ages because no mental command was ever even issued to stop.

The thing worth keeping in mind is that women are just as prone to being on auto-pilot as men, but the things that draw a woman's attention don't tend to be as socially unacceptable as what draws a man's attention... and funnily enough that results in women having WORSE self-control than men. Because they aren't socially obligated to control themselves ALL the time.

Sun_Kim-Ai · Answer

I think it depends.

Some think that a "real man" should act like that. Others live with the mindset of instant gratification, so they must have what they want right here and now. They think like animals.

Personally, I'm not shy and I can be quite direct in letting a woman know I like her - but I don't oogle, I don't go ooga booga and I don't creep on her. If she reciprocates that's fine, if she doesn't that's fine too.

Lucy68 · Answer

I honestly want to say hormones and depends on the female like if she's cute and stuff

Luckily for me (I guess) most men can control their sexual urges around me cause well my presence and how I look keeps them well "down" down there. My ex doesn't count cause he was a sadistic monster. Other than that I'm safe

ProbablyClueless · Answer

I think it's probably more about balancing the behavior in our heads, if that makes sense.

It's not that hard to not look at other women besides our girlfriend, but there are also a lot of other women on the planet, so we'd have to always be on our guard and the consequence of merely looking at an attractive woman isn't really that big of a deal. There's a difference between noticing a woman and gawking at a woman.

Most men would have a tough time not glancing at an attractive woman from time to time. Most men would have a much easier time simply not drooling over every attractive woman they pass by.

Same kind of deal with cheating. It's really not that hard to not try to have sex with your attractive coworker. It actually makes your day simpler if you don't try to sleep with your coworkers.

Geo1970 · Answer

I must admit that I enjoy the company of women and have many female friends where the relationship between is purely plutonic and that won’t change.

But either certain female friends, or new female friends I have met I have problems controlling the fact that I fancy these women.

I think that it is perfectly healthy for anybody either male or female to be in such a situation.

Just because you fancy a certain, female , male or both, doesn’t mean to say it’s purely pleasing on the eye alone. It could be also numerous other traits about their character and what they have to say about certain things, not just visually pleasing.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

There's a modern saying for that situation, addressing this issue in a world where people may confuse thoughts and acts. There's even people believing that sexual thoughts have to be oppressed or repressed, these ones are the most dangerous, socially. Since they are walking time bombs.

Thank you not, religious traditions, they'll know who and what they are.

Anpu23 · Answer

Male brains exhibit a strong connection between their sexual centers and visual stimuli. Specific brain areas, like the amygdala, hypothalamus, and visual cortex, are activated when males view sexually arousing images. These regions play a crucial role in processing and responding to visual sexual stimuli, contributing to the experience of sexual arousal and other related behaviors. As opposed to female brains where sexual centers are tied to the areas of cognitive stimulus.

In other words guys see sexy then process the thoughts behind it. While women think sexy. So in a woman's brain they see something that triggers a sexy thought. In male brains the trigger is pre-cognition. The visual input itself was sexy without understanding or processing. And as its pre cognition its also involuntary. Of course acting on it is post cognition there's no excuse for inappropriate actions. But there is no mechanism to prevent processing a visual stimulus as sexy.

TheWombRaider · Answer

We can but women who dress provocative do it on purpose they want the attention or else they wouldn't dress like that. Every women hates every other women they are in competition with each other. Even lesbian women still want a dick or use dildos on each other. They just love the emotion side of being with a women but sexual still want a dick

meepmeeperton · Answer

Men can control their behavior but maybe not the abstract desire or attraction. You would have to be pretty monastic to realistically say you have control over it in my humble opinion

alli-112 · Answer

Nope, they 100% can and plenty do. Any guy that acts like he can't is bullshitting or lacks personal discipline. Don't get me wrong, some physical reactions are semi-involuntary, but anything beyond that is personal choice. It's a display of immaturity at best and malice/negligence at worst.

Sonorous · Answer

Most probably can't. But then you have the weird ones like me who have no issue. Even if a beautiful woman was in front of me & was dtf, I would decline. Not because I think I'm better than her. I just really disagree with the implications & expectations involved in mating & dating. So now I cringe at the entire thing. The kind of cringe that we feel when we see someone trying at something futile & subjectively meaningless.

Bricealan · Answer

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KennethNoisewater · Answer

I think there needs to be a definition of “creepin” in your post. Don’t get me wrong, I think a lot of dudes are creeps. No doubt about it. But I don’t think looking at a woman falls under that definition.
Attraction isn’t something anyone can control. It’s impossible. Example, if you put a magnet and a piece of metal close enough, they will be pulled together. The metal is attracted by the magnet. I understand there are different reasons for that but that’s the same principle of the word attraction. When your brain sees something that it’s attracted to, your eyes will follow. That’s a dopamine hit. That’s attraction. But at that point it’s the guys responsibility to make a decision, keep drooling or look away and continue with his day.
So I agree with you that dudes can be creeps. I also think just because you were noticed by a man doesn’t mean that man is scum.

soe11 · Answer

We can not paint one brushed to everyone.  Some can and some can not. Regarding revealing outfits on female I personally endorse and encourage my girlfriend to wear revealing outfits publicly l  I proud my girlfriend look attractive and sexy. Allowing her wear Teeny Tiny micro adjustable strings bikinis on resorts and poolside parties as well cruise vessel.

dustybiker2 · Answer

My man looks around and notes everything... it's also a significant part of his job training. You don't know who men are or what they are thinking. Going around thinking the worst of everyone without giving them the opportunity to prove otherwise is a helluva way to live.

Try smiling maybe? That often shocks them into smiling back politely if you feel ogled.

If you receive none then you were the better person.

WonderingManII · Answer

Men only can control what they do with their sexual desires, we can't stop ourselves from looking. Our sex drives are connected directly to our eyes.

goaded · Answer

Of course they can absolutely control their urges, but looking from a distance isn't an attack. Staring up close, or after you've received a frown is borderline harassment, cat-calling or anything worse definitely is.

I feel that you're demanding that all (some? most?) men should avert their eyes when you pass by, and that seems unreasonable and, frankly, controlling.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Half of the people on this planet are women; you expect married men to avoid looking at every woman? Tell me, how many men do you look at on an average day?

It is an absolutely ridiculous expectation to think that every married person should avoid looking at half of the population!

RedInnocent69 · Answer

We can manage, but not suppress. Obviously I’m not going to jump a colleague in the middle of a meeting, but I’m going to feel it my sack and be dripping precum by the end if I really have the hots for them, even if I’m not on full boner alert at the time

NathanDavis · Answer

bullshit... obviously, most people can control their urges no problem... otherwise, we would not been here today as we are... lmao but then, we got the odd ones here and there... damaged

larry69 · Answer

I don't look at or speak to women unless I have business reasons. I keep my mouth shut and accept that women do not like me. It's the safest way to keep out of trouble

DonaldDarko · Answer

It's easy unless you're low IQ then you're closer to an animal whether you're male or female. A ton of women in California are like that to, disgusting pigs. I think it's because no one ever raised them. I think their parents were ghetto garbage too.

alice55 · Answer

In my experience most men control it and don't really stare that much some look but fast, it's quite rare for men to stare that hard.

KrisPW · Answer

I don’t think most men are like that. While their eyes may roam, most are conscious enough not to stare.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Control over one's impulses, including sexual ones, is a fundamental aspect of human agency and responsibility, and men often fail miserably.

genericname85 · Answer

we are animals. we don't just act like it. and even tho that is true we still have some level of countroll over our urges. it's the same with women too. if you're crazy horny, you do dumb shit. men do the same. cause we're all animals. don't act as if you're above it. you're not.

lyrem04 · Answer

They can … they refuse to and blame it on testosterone

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

I SURE CAN... when I see a fat broad in shorts !!!

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Yes they can. Those that can't are weak and also can put themselves in serious danger if he comes across a b*&#& of a woman who can and will use it against him.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

Yup, men can control their sexual compulsions. Similarly, women can control their emotional state. Care to do the math on who is getting better results overall?

Mark987 · Answer

I had a girllfriend when I was young, we had a bet who could get the other more out of control. She won't by a long shot lpol.

Shiprex · Answer

LOL avoid LOOKING? What kind of nonsense is avoid LOOKING? Like why not say avoid breathing.

It's only creepy to women when they deem their presence to be more important than others and their ego is ruling their rationality.

sirderpsalot123 · Answer

Can we discreetly glance instead of staring at a woman? Sure  I barely pay any attention to most women.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Everyone has the ability, they say they can't cause they don't want to, it's more of an excuse

convo_king89 · Answer

depends on what’s normal to see. If we only see your tits in a strip club then we’re are gonna wanna check ur tits.

LiamS95 · Answer

I can control myself most of the time but a woman like you can present a challenge in that department sometimes.

PrinceWalnut · Answer

I think I've seen studies that suggest being very horny inhibits your judgment as much as being drunk

DrPepper12 · Answer

Truly some cannot or choose not to. Fucking bizarre

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Can women be more considerate and not self serving, and deceitful about why they wear what they wear? Also looking is not creeping.. Plenty of women look and perv too..

Xawyx-2 · Answer

I can, easily, but the question is obviously too private to talk about details.

Sam1133 · Answer

I became slave in front of my favorite women's  But if I'm not interested then you stand naked in front of me I behave like you didn't exist.. 🤌

HelpfulGirlll · Answer

True but... who are you to preach? Until you become someone men look up to, keep your mouth shut about masculinity advice.

slatyb · Answer

Why would we avoid looking at women? There's a difference between looking and leering. Most men don't love it when women dress modestly. Avoid the ones that do.

Mangospacho · Answer

We can except when we can’t and then we just call it a disorder so no one can shame us.

hello4433 · Answer

Those who don't have boundaries and don't respect others boundaries won't control

spartan55 · Answer

You seem to be implying that any glance at any woman is 'creeping' on her which is ridiculous.

Likes2drive · Answer

I can control them but the desires are still there. It’s just I don’t act on it or make it obvious since I do have control over how I would act in public., I am civilized I do have manners. The guys that don’t control it usually just don’t care.

PaleDale · Answer

I can control my actions, but not my anatomy down there

LiaRaven · Answer

I’ve never notice something like that, some men have a high sex drive but still they are able to control it lol

Batsy01010101 · Answer

Why do some women act like whores who spread their legs who can't control their desires enough to even just avoid getting their cunts stuffed with cock

Grond21 · Answer

Some men can and you don't notice them. Some men don't, and you do notice them. It's a perspective bias.

MasterKS · Answer

yes, men can't control their sexual urge its a truth and nature made us like that.

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

Then try telling women to control there PMS and stop using it as an excuse to slap their boyfriends or any guys on their way

dudeinohio · Answer

I'll look all. i. want and you liberal squids can't do anything about it.

jahaims · Answer

Look into how a females opinion on a male changes once they take male level testosterone

FenixG45 · Answer

Men are hardwired to respond visual stimuli of how women look and behave. Some men can't keep it in their pants.

TallAnon · Answer

We can and we do, otherwise you wouldn't be able to cross the street.

chrissykerdock · Answer

its ok if they look touching is criminal

sawno · Answer

I can. But yes some guys lack self control.

dragoblack · Answer

We can, if we self-reflect, emotionally mature, and make effort to work on ourselves.

Can men seriously not control their lust/sexual desires?

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