Why are women addictive/attracted to abusive men romantically?

[Anonymous]

[Genie23]

You need to stop generalising because not every woman is attracted to abusive men. I think I know why some women get attracted to abusive men though.

• Really low self esteem. So, they feel they don't deserve someone better.
• Grew up in abusive home and have been treated like that so she feels it's normal or used to it
• Not able to differentiate between care or control. They see being controlled as "my partner loves me and cares about me so much that's why he's behaving that way or expecting this from me"
• Wanting to fix him. I know some girls who saw those guys as challenges and wanted to be the one to save/fix them because they feel I'll treat him so good and give him so much love that he'll change.. he'll heal

[Asker]

Guess you've never been to Essex.

[Genie23]

No, I haven't but I still think not every woman who lives there prefers abusive men. Some are normal and prefer to be with a guy who would treat them with love and respect

[Asker]

Hardly a thing over here, just faking it to get something in return a lot of them. So many have low self worth or entitlement issues.
Most of them hold out until one of 2 gym guy with personality problems or abusive addicts makes advance on them.

You walk down rd & straightaway you find couples arguing about something unnecessary.

[Genie23]

That's just sad. I moved more than few times in the last 10 years and from what I've seen is there were some cities or some part of the cities that had many dysfunctional family. So, they'd fight so loudly that you could hear them from a long distance and they didn't even hesitate to fight on the road and I've seen the kind of people they date. It really made me feel sad and worried but I kinda got it. They've never been treated better. So, most of them just prefer to be with someone who is sort of familiar like girls with bad father's tend to go for guys who reminds them of their dad.

[Nikki1989]

Jeez, speechless!

I won't argue with an idiot; it's like talking to a squirrel.

[AaronKrieger]

Women do not want to be abused. Most of them will leave a guy if he is or show signs of it, but some do not. Some women stay because they had abusive parents themselves (who we date is influenced by that), a low self-esteem, or something else along those lines. Just Google trauma bonding.

Also, not all abusive men are abusive right away either and sometimes it's both partners who are abusive.

[Anonymous]

Trauma bonding. Google it.