I overheard a guy I like say "there's definitely something there, but I don't have time for that," when asked about me. How should I take that?

[Anonymous]

Granted, he just got a new job, left a relationship, is moving, and is in a generally stressful time, but I haven't added to that stress by telling him how I feel. Someone else just tried to play matchmaker and now I wish I hadn't heard anything.

Obviously, I wasn't meant to hear this, and I don't plan on saying anything, but I feel weird about it. Like, is he saying I'm too much or that the hypothetical "we" would be difficult? Or is it a "I don't have the bandwidth to give her what I would want to, so I'd rather not try," thing?

[HollyK21]

It very simply means he doesn’t have time. There is no time in his life for romance. He isn’t interested in dating right now. There’s zero confusion in his statement.

[jazzy34]

When a man isn’t sure about you, let him be. I had to do the same thing recently.

[Asker]

That's absolutely the plan

[Anonymous]

He probably doesn't want a long distance relationship.

[spartan55]

Just forget it good lord, you sound super desperate.

[Asker]

I see why you're in your 50s giving advice on the internet.

[spartan55]

What does that have to do with anything? That makes no sense.

[HollyK21]

It has nothing to do with anything other than being ageist and butthurt over the word “desperate”. I don't know about you Spartan but if I’m going to invite a bunch of people I don’t know to comment on a situation I’m clearly too embarrassed to own (aka being anon), then I’m going in ready for any and all feedback. If I couldn’t handle words that hurt my feelings I would never open the door to receive them.

[spartan55]

@HollyK21
Yeah, I agree. I can take whatever, but at least come back at me with something that makes sense so we can possibly have a discussion. Wishful thinking I guess.

[qwerty2469]

Make his life easier so he has time to pump sperm into your guts.