Should I stay no contact with a guy who lied and treated me like a rebound?

[Anonymous]

I started talking to this guy 1 month and I thought we were becoming really good friends. Very quickly though it became super intense. He would call me every morning and night, we would do sleep calls, flirt, constantly want my presence while gaming/cooking and was always asking when we would meet up.

he was honest from beginning that he had a very complicated relationship with his girlfriend He also told me she was struggling emotionally with the breakup/situation. I respected the honesty and thought maybe we could just stay friends.

But over time the dynamic stopped feeling like friendship because of how relationship-like he acted with me. I eventually told him I felt uncomfortable because he was being very flirty with me while still having matching bios with another girl. After I mentioned it, he immediately removed her from his social media.

But later he quietly added her back again what broke my trust was when he told me he “had to go to his army senior’s house” instead of a concert he was originally meant to attend. Later I realised he actually went to the concert and the girl was there too. Around the same time he followed her again on multiple platforms there were many moments where he would suddenly end calls saying his “senior” was calling and now I honestly think it may have been her.

At that point I started feeling really uncomfortable because it felt emotionally messy and dishonest. So I quietly removed him from my socials and blocked his number because I didn’t want to become a rebound or get dragged deeper into a complicated situation.

After that he called and messaged me constantly from multiple numbers, requested me on different platforms multiple times, viewed my TikTok, even contacted my mum asking what he did wrong. Eventually I sent one calm closure message saying I wanted to let things go for the best and wished him well

Now around 3–4 days have passed with no contact and today he randomly requested to follow me again on Facebook.

[Taurus_Woman]

If he lied and treated you like a rebound, no contact is usually the healthiest choice.
You’re not “punishing” him, you’re protecting your own peace. Someone who uses you as a rebound has already shown they’re not ready for something stable or respectful.
Staying in contact often:
keeps you emotionally stuck
gives mixed signals
makes it harder to move on

No contact gives you space to detach, reflect, and reset your standards. If he ever truly changes, it should be shown through consistent actions over time, not words while you’re still emotionally available.
Focus on yourself first.

[Finchie40]

Yes, absolutely, why waste your time on someone that just likes the convenience of you? You are clearly not his top priority , he just likes what he thinks he can receive from you , but doesn’t truly love you or only want you. So you are doing the right thing by not contacting him at all and ignoring him , realize you deserve someone way better than that shit. I do the same thing to girls’ that do not make me their top priority , that just like the convenience of me , they are just a waste of time and you are setting yourself up for disaster , if you choose to give them a chance. Because they only like what they can receive from you but truly don’t love you or want only you. Someone that truly likes you and wants to be with you is going to invest most of their time into you , you will be the only one they are chasing after and not have anyone else that they are contemplating on. So never be an option to anyone , be a priority and you can thank me later 😊

[slatyb]

Block him everywhere, reject the follow. He is bad news.

[HollyK21]

From what I read, it sounds like you made the right choice and are better off letting him go. Maybe things started off with friendship, but I think in your heart of hearts you know it was becoming more than that. When you think about it, there’s nothing valuable about that connection to go back to. What trust you’d gained in the time you’ve known each other has been betrayed, you can’t be simple friends because you are attracted to one another, and you shouldn’t want him as a suitor because you saw first hand what he does behind his girlfriends back. I won’t say you were fully innocent in this, because unless I’m incorrect it sounds like even after you were made aware of him having a girlfriend you partook in even some light flirting. But in any case, what’s done is done. It’s better to just let go of this troublesome man, and move on to someone who respects and values you more.

[Amy10223]

No, I would stay away from him. It sounds like he can't seem to part from his ex girlfriend, or confused about his own feelings. Let him sort it out himself, and save yourself some grief. He is being honest with you, yes, but also sneaky if he is putting his ex girl back on his social media thinking you won't see it. Before it's too late and you wind up in a mess, find someone else.

[Babyseal23]

If ever in doubt about a guy leave him be, no ones got time for players. If he genuinely liked and respected you hed make it happen and wouldn't be giving mixed messages. Your doing the right thing. You were honest about how you felt and if he's not mature enough to do the same then fuck him. Block him and dont bother dealing with him anymore

[daveed_D]

I’ve found that staying no contact is usually the only way to get your mental clarity back after being treated like a rebound. I actually started thinking about this while scrolling through an online site davidwygant I found, and it made me realize that you can’t have a grounded sanctuary if you’re letting someone dishonest drain your emotional tank. Protecting your own peace and sticking to radical honesty about how he treated you is the best way to move on.

[Anonymous]

I think you did what was best for you. He sounds as if he’s really still attached to his ex but using you to fill some sort of void. As far as him contacting your mom and being so aggressive he might feel insecure at the moment because the relationship situation with his “ex” and this builds his ego or self worth.

If you choose to keep him at a distance and try not to get to attached. He sounds flaky and in need of attention.

[DishLady]

Why would you want to talk to a guy who lied to you? If you go back to him (or stay put) he'll presume that you're not opposed to being treated the same way moving forward.

[_xhoxo]

From what you're saying he kind of 'played' with you, this is so bad. Protect yourself, I'm proud of you you were able to delete him and cut him off. He's not the last man in your life remember it. If this is just the beginnig and he already treated you like that don't let him fool you more. You'll find the one for you who will be treating you as a princess.

[Pieterrabbit1]

I think it’s most healthy to not engage in contact with him again. He clearly messed you around and lied to you. Yes he might be influenced by the fact he is dealing with a messy situationship with another girl, but that just shows he doesn’t respect you the way you deserve.

[Nikki1989]

Most men are hardwired to lie, so you can't fix that. The rebound thing is your call. It is not a big deal for some people.

[OlderAndWiser]

What reason would you have to resume contact with him?

[Alex-Snow]

He needs to grow up. I think he is not trustworthy and does not get the message. Were you involved sexually with him?

[S_f21]

Yes, stay no contact! It protects your peace and if he’s still back and forth with his ex girlfriend, it means he’s not over her and he only talks to you when it’s convenient. Don’t be the consolation prize, be the reward he never can get!

[LiamS95]

He's not for you, he will never make you happy.

[WhitneySnow]

Dump this guy. Totally go no contact.

[dudeinohio]

Absolutely