Doesn't feel any different now that we're dating.

[Anonymous]

My best guy friend and I recently started dating. There has always been this little spark between us of natural chemistry. He finally asked me out... which was super cute, but I've noticed that now we're apparently dating, it doesn't feel any different than it did before... Is that weird? I feel like when we weren't dating, he'd wink at me and I'd smile, but now... We just kind of hang out like two really good friends? I think he'd be pretty upset if I broke up with him, but idk, is that what dating should feel like?

It's not that I'm not excited about it, it's just... idk, it feels like we're two good friends spending time together, but it doesn't quite feel like we're boyfriend and girlfriend. Any advice?

[Konnour]

Because he probably still doesn't even try to kiss you, to hold your hand or to treat you with an extra effort - like holding doors and chair for you, giving you flowers, taking you to new places and so on..

Despite you are kinda "dating" now it's still the same, old hanging out and he still treats you as a female buddy not a woman he's fancying.

...that's what I assume according to your description.

Initiate something physical.. doesn't matter where, when and how. That should kickstart everything!

@other posters: As they already know each other is actually a plus instead of a flaw.. you can't hold "mystery" for eternity without preventing everything to develop any further.

[Asker]

Yeah! Exactly. There's kind of none of that cutesy stuff. He's a nice person... but there's no... yeah. You get it. What do I do?

[Konnour]

Initiate it yourself, get more "touchy" and drop (reasonably understandable) hints of what you expect.

[Asker]

haha but I'm kind of shy...

[Konnour]

There's no other way.

You won't gonna just wait for a miracle, will you?

[Asker]

haha idk, we'll see. maybe not lol

[TooOldForThis5545]

When the two of you spend time together, do you have fun with him? Do you miss him when he's not with you? Or do you feel indifferent? It takes time to get a sense of whether a guy is boyfriend material; you only recently started dating him, right? (And no, the previous friendship doesn't count from a dating standpoint.) In my experience, it takes at least a month or two of dating to establish a relationship, but if you lose romantic interest in him before then, you shouldn't waste his time -- or yours.

[Asker]

Of course I miss him when we aren't around each other. I love our chats. I miss those when I don't see him all the time. It's been 2 weeks, but I've known him for like 7 years haha. How do I know if he is/isn't boyfriend material?

[TooOldForThis5545]

That's something you must answer for yourself. For me personally, a woman is girlfriend material when I want to be with her to the exclusion of all other women; she's someone I would be proud to include in my circle of family and friends.

[Asker]

Hmm that's a good way of thinking about it... I like that. I'll have to think about that a bit more.

[kairon156]

I agree. with Anonymoushunk. you two have been such good friends there's not much new things left to learn about one another. do you two cuddle more or kiss or anything like that? how about trying to set up a date with him?

[Asker]

We cuddle and we have kissed! I guess it's only been two weeks. We haven't done anything really other than just hang out, watch movies, play games etc. nothing out of the ordinary.

[kairon156]

well coupples do that sort of thing too. you can see if he want's to go on a date as a first offical step if you want to. I'm sure your relationship will feel more like a coupple over time. :)

[Asker]

Yeah, lol. You're probably right. I really think it's just that I'm so afraid to lose him that I'm almost looking for reasons for this to not work so I don't lose him..?

[kairon156]

I think you should enjoy the moments you have together and move things along as they feel natural.

[Asker]

Good point. Why rush things? Thanks so much! :)

[kairon156]

any time :)

[unleashedsavage]

give it some time hun. rome wasn't built in a day.. he proably as nervous ryt now or proably trying his best to please you..

[Asker]

ah. gotcha. good point... I'm just afraid it won't work!

[anonymoushunk]

sunds like its cool, relationships work better when their is less pressure

[Asker]

I think I am looking for reasons not to date... I mean, this is my best friend... This is scary and it never works out! Neither of us want to marry young... what are the chances of staying together forever?

[anonymoushunk]

It can be scary, but you both get on really well as it is. Don't over complicate things or try and change to much. My opinion is it could work, just don't stress too much x

[Asker]

Lol yeah, I think I am. Thank you!

[anonymoushunk]

No problem :-)