How can I feel less self conscious about my body?

[Anonymous]

It's never really bothered me that much, but now with summer starting (and things like pool parties, going to the beach or pool and pretty much any other place where people tend to go shirtless) I feel pretty bad. I'm really hairy, not exactly tall, I have thin arms, do not have a defined jaw line, have fat covering my six pack (or lack thereof) and got thick upper legs. I've tried working out, but I don't have money for the gym, equipment or protein shakes and all that, and after a month and a half of hard work at home and doing my best to cut out any bad food I realised there were absolutely no improvements. I quit because of a lack of motivation and time. Now I feel like avoiding situations that require taking off my shirt. My friends are now going to the gym together because their parents pay for their subscription, and girls sure did notice that. Makes me sad when I see girls drooling over tall muscled guys on social media saying: "If only guys like him would hit on me." Should I just accept that my facial features and personality are all I have to work with, or is there anything else I can do to make this a little bit better?

[Chuga]

Being conscious of your body at this age is intense, it basically sneaks its way into your head and stays there. The easiest thing I can say is that later on in life, regardless of how your body looks, people will love you for you and not for how your body looks. Sure it does play a part, but if someone loves you for your body first and your persona second, you will be better off with someone else.

Right, so how do we make this better? Gym is nice to go to but if you can't afford the gym fees, there are many things you can do at home that will help. First and foremost, start jogging. Cardio will help to make your heart stronger and burn some of the fat. To improve muscle tone, try weights. Note that you can literally use anything for weight, water bottles, bricks, cylinder blocks, textbooks, chairs, tables etc as long as you are careful! They can hurt you if done incorrectly.

Start slowly, seeing no improvement for 6 weeks is pretty much par for the course, MEANINGFUL developments show up at around 3 months of continuous workout. If you can, eat more chicken which will give you more protein in your diet and help grow muscle tissue. Try pushups and some crunches but be aware that if you don't lose the fat by your abdomen, the muscle buildup will make it look like you are gaining weight.

Drink water instead of fizzy drinks! Being hydrated helps as well. Once you start doing continuous workouts, you will see the change. If you feel unmotivated, try working out with a friend! A gym does not have to be the be all and end all for becoming fit, use what you have!

On a side note, girls will always be attracted to fit guys. They will get interested in what they see because from a biological standpoint, that should mean a better chance of healthy offspring. However, this does not mean that because of your current body type, things will not work out. Keep a positive attitude and remember that being healthy is the key goal here, the benefits will follow! Don't be afraid of your body, you only get one, so while you are working out, appreciate it to the max. It may not look like what you want it to, but there are people who can't do anything with their body too.

Good luck Anonymous, go for it and keep it positive yeah!

[Asker]

Thanks, will consider this.

[Joshua2332]

Let me tell you something. The problem is YOU. Whatever you're doing at the gym is clearly not working. It took me about a year of lifting to finally realize what worked for me.

How much money do you have? Find a gym that is cheap. Planet Fitness is only $10 a month. Cutting out bad food? You don't need to do this. It's calories in vs. calories out. You are born with flaws on your body as everyone else has. However, you have to put your foot down and make a change about it.

Just message me if you're serious about this.

[Asker]

I'm not doing anything at the gym as of now. Sure, the gym offers good equipment and personal trainers, but I can't afford it. The local gym is €25 a month, and I don't have a car so I can't go elsewhere to a cheaper gym. I'm currently applying for a job to solve the money problem. Hopefully that makes things a bit easier.

[Joshua2332]

I paid 80 US dollars a month for my first gym. I recently left after 2 years. You CAN afford it just stop spending your money on junk food and the clubs...

[Asker]

I've never even been to a club cause I'm only 16 and you gotta be at least 18 for most clubs around here, and I eat the food my mom cooks me instead of spending money on junk food. My parents give me €10 a month, and on my birthday I receive money from family/friends. Basically all the money I get. That's why I need a job.

[Sehaj]

Nahh..
when u have a real girlfriend.. u ll know it doesn't matter that much..

Its like when i ask u what girl u wanna be with physically... u ll define all kinds of perfect ways ur girl can be physically..

But in reality you're not really drooling for a girl like that.. but just the one who understands you loves you and is presentable (physically).

Instead just be confident.. and carry yourself with confidence to those parties.. and be the best guy (naturewise) .. Its sufficient for girls to dump all those guys for you.

You carry your charm in the way u talk etc...

[Asker]

Thanks man, appreciate it.

[Sehaj]

You're welcome :-)

[nerdybirdy42]

Hey u have to go to sleep but message me I am in same situation I want to help you out

[nerdybirdy42]

So I am awake I agree with sehaj also man I am the same way but I just finished highschool the sick thing is when we are in high school or middle school people especially girls can be shallow most don't want guys with hair but as you get older they start to notice you more especially if you have good character and you will find the right girl also he really is a challenge go shirtless fir most of a pool party nobody will really care and you'll slowly gain confidence I am like you. I am hairy I git thunder thighs and I struggle with weight lost and the key is a change in diet but not a major one start with small ones then work your way up and exercise which can be. A bitch so stretch out before you work out stay consistent you'll develop arm muscle slowly but surely with body weight exercises YouTube them. Also you are going to have to wait more then a month in a half to get results because going natural in weight loss is slow nit fast I also suggestrunking be like me

[nerdybirdy42]

I suggest running too be like me walk the course and pick a point where you start jogging and a point where you stop make it have some distance if you don't make it the 1st time that's fine keep working towards it and when you do reach that point try going a little further then you can celebrate clap your hands flick off the air and imaginary haters and doubts in your head and keep going it is going to sick at first but It will help you. If you feel self conscious about running or anything think about it this way. This is your body live in it the way you feel most comfortable work hard and if anyone judges you for working hard well fuck them they are not you they don have to lI've in it you do. So keep working towards your goals

[Asker]

Sounds like a plan, thanks.