I used to be fat, but now I've got a good body and now boys that used to bully me want me, what do I do?

[Anonymous]

I used to be really heavy, but I recently lost a lot of weight and everyone's been telling me how good I look. Not only that, but I've become very successful for my looks now. I've been getting noticed by modeling agencies, currently had a couple call backs for some parts in movies, and now am practicing to compete in a pageant. I'm very happy about my life, but before now I used to be bullied for my looks because I was heavier. Now the boys that used to bully me are trying their hardest to date me and the girls that used to ignore me are trying to suck up to me/be my friend. Should I allow these people into my life or cut them out? And how do I go about doing this?

Yes!

No!

Other... (specify)

[Kiwedin]

Ignore them. I had a friend who went through the same thing. She was my lab partner in grade 8 and ever since we were friends even though a lot of my other friends really didn't like her. She did have a very controversial personality I guess, but I also thought she was really funny. She was the kind of person people either loved or hated, unfortunately most everyone hated her. She ended up losing a lot of weight after high school and a lot of the hot guys we went to school with were definitely trying to hook up with her. She was stoked about it and actually did hook up with some of them, but I really wish she hadn't because, being friends with them, I knew what they really thought of her. Not too long ago, I had a party and invited a lot of people from high school and she came up in some of the conversations. The guys were talking about how they slept with her or how they wanted to sleep with her and how hot she was now, but then they'd share stories of how much of a psycho she was and it got really mean. What I'm trying to say, is that these guys only want to sleep with you now and you are so much better than that. You deserve guys who think the world of you, not guys who only think of you as a conquest.

[Azara]

you said your friend went through the 'same' thing, but you did not mention bullying. is that bc they did not bully, or because you think not liking someone ids the same thing as bullying? it is not.

if those guys did bully, why were they your friend?

[Kiwedin]

@Azara She was bullied. People weren't very nice to her, not only about her looks. She was very tall, so when she was overweight, guys would make fun of her for being "mannish" and the rest of our classmates would just exclude her in everything and talk about her behind her back. They'd call her crazy, psycho, etc. because no one knew at the time that she was actually dealing with depression, bipolar disorder, anorexia, bulimia, and I'm not sure what else.
I was friends with them because I was in high school and I was nice to whoever was nice to me, that's it. I'm not friends with them now really, I only invited them to my Halloween party because it was a reunion type thing and nearly everyone from high school was there.

[Anonymous]

They don't deserve you. There's no reason to bully someone. If they didn't find you attractive before, then they didn't have to date you. That's it. They should not have bullied you. They're mean people and not someone you want to be in a relationship with.

[madhatters4]

i would not. their bullying previously and treatment of you now shows that they essentially have objectified you. if they truly liked you they would have treated you better when you werent attractive to them. so do you really want to consider guys who are rude and bully people based on physical appearance?

obviously it's not like they have to find you attractive regardless of your appearance but treating people with kindness (or not) is a personality trait and clearly these guys aren't kind people

[Arthur1970]

Those guys needs lesson. Show them how rude they were with ignoring them or showing something similar. Such people really need learn how to act not only in accordance to woman but all the others as well. Or you will show them like good person you are and they will be rude against somebody else. ( for some of them ( with brain) its working for somebody ( without brain) no. But no other cure is existing)

[DivaMonae]

This is what you do and you do it exactly in this way. You tell them to go FUCK their self and go stick up both of your middle fingers. After you do that you do a hair flip as you turn to walk away from them in the opposite direction.

Those people wanted nothing to do with you before now and it should be no difference all of a sudden. Remember who your true friends were.

[LuvSoccer13]

My dear no no no this exact thing happened to me and trust me, all those boys wanr now is sex... i learned the hard way, thinking all these popular good looking guys wanted me because i was finally beautiful and my body went with my amazing personality but no no they just want in your pants, cut those people out of your life and tell them that if they really wanted you then being a bit bigger wouldn't have mattered to them in the first place

[rjroy3]

Depends on what you want really. It's not been long enough for them to have grown from being your bullies. They're the same people. But that doesn't mean you can't be friendly. I say make them eat their heart out.

Be friendly and kind, but if they try for anything more than friendship just straight up reject them. You don't need people like that in your life.

[bryon]

If that's all it took to be accepted by those same people that didn't have time for you other than being mean only shows how shallow they are. This type of people aren't worth letting into your life , they will only bring drama and heart ache

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

ugh I hate those kinds of people. just basically tell them to fuck off. they're so superficial you don't want anything to do with jerks like that.

[ScruffynateAK]

These are people that you've seen a really bad side of, do you want them in your life?
It's up to you, it depends on what they did, but they don't seem like the type of people you want to hang with.
Congrats on everything you've achieved by the way :D

[abc3643]

You need to see this classic now cult movie...

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Girl_Most_Likely_to

[NYkid27]

I wouldn't associate yourself with anyone who was mean to you when you were overweight. They're shallow and they don't really care about you

[Azara]

well id cut them no question. they are still the same assholes they always were. if you befriend them then you are condoning and rewarding their behavior.

you are either against bullying or you are not. decide your position.

[Azara]

Wow, i can not believe 22% of the guys think bullying is 'ok' behavior.

[WhatTheHellAmy]

I've always said forgiving and forgetting is the best you can do, but in this case is different. They want you because of your looks and that's wrong. They should have been helpful when you weren't attractive.

[RubisitaMamasita]

FUCK THOSE BITCHES. Dont let them into your life. They just want to get something out of you now that you're ON TOP OF YOUR SHIT. FUCK THEM HUN. you're successful, happy, fucking beautiful, and you don't need that kind of hypocrisy in your life.

[BelleGirl21]

No you don't give them the time of day. They clearly don't respect you for who you are they just see you as an object they want.

[GirlsLie]

If you have to doubt if someone should be in your life, it's pretty safe to say they probably shouldn't be.

[brnxsweet]

Forget them! They're very shallow and not worth your time. They'll find out what they were missing when they decided to ignore you and now you seem to be doing better than them.

[Dtegesd123]

don't give them any attention!!! That's like saying I should date a girl, who rejected me multiple times while driving a Lexus until I pulled up in a Ferrari.

[Mesonfielde]

These people are two-sided untrustworthy scumbags, and you should cut them out of your life for what they had done.

[thorthorley]

Its best to just be friendly, but its like you have to hang out with them if you dont want to. If you just reject them, you'll look like a bitch.

[mentor]

they will never be your friend or anything they just want to take advantage of you. They pushed you around and so you should give them hell by succeeding and not letting them in your life. Remember who you are always.

[Anonymous]

i cannot believe you... im not even gonna read thiss
he bullied you and now he wants to date you because your body is f####ble in his eyes and you're actually considering it?

are you for real?
dude come on !

[kerouac5]

If they didn't see the inner and outer beauty in you before; they aren't worth your time.