How do I calm my anxiety down?

[LifeIsStrange]

My anxiety gives me a really bad stomach, headaches, dizziness and makes me very introverted. Sometimes just walking through town makes me feel uncomfortable... my heart races and I feel like everyone's looking at me!
Tonight I'm going Zumba and I'm actually nervous! After breaking up with my boyfriend it got worse cause I just stopped wanting to see people. It's like I've forgotten how to socialise and I feel uncomfortable in my own skin, like I'm constantly being judged.

Is there anything I can do to make it better? I don't really have many friends and the ones I do I'm trying to reconnect with. I was doing so well but it's gotten bad again 😔

[mwin2030]

It has been my experience that the best way to kill anxiety is meditation and breathing exercises. If you use physical exercise in my view, you're only tiring out the power emotions running rampant inside you, but you're not actually dealing with them. It is like individuals who can't sleep, so they exercise just to wear themselves out to the point they fall asleep or simply pass out, but they've not dealt with the heart of the issue, which is preventing them from falling asleep naturally.

When it comes to social and internal turmoils, which causes a person to feel out of sync with those around them, with themselves, and with the world in general, and they exercise; sure you are distracting yourself, but it is like putting a bandage on a DAM that's holding back millions of gallons of water. Eventually the bandage is going to break and you're going to be flooded with all the thoughts, worries, and anxieties you've been keeping bottled up and only suppressing through exercise. What you actually need to do is learn to deal with the negative and balance them within yourself, and in doing so you take the power away from such worries, thoughts, and anxiety from having control over your emotions----and you.

What I suggest is finding a quiet, isolated, place where you feel safe and secure and then sit quietly and practice breathing and meditation. There are a few on the Internet you can research and practice, but the basics is you need to reflect upon the root of what's bothering you and why such thoughts and feelings make you react the way you do. Since you're safe and secure, you know nothing negative will occur and you can rationally look at such feelings and emotions and why they affect you as they do and learn to turn them to positive thoughts and emotions, even if just half way, so you can function and you're not just suppressing them.

Your actions to reconnect with friends is also a step in the right direction, given we humans are social creatures. However, don't just try to wear yourself out so your mind and heart is too tired to feel what's bothering you. Instead let's pull these thoughts and feelings out and find out what's wrong and then we can actually heal the problem. This is called: Balancing the Equation. And this is what I'd suggest if I was in your situation.

[GoldMeddle]

Therapy. But not talk therapy. CBT. CBT has a talk therapy component as well. You can plan different exposures with a therapist. Anxiety is programmed into your brain, so in order to change how your brain is programmed you have to teach it not to be afraid. AKA facing situations which cause fear and showing your brain that everything is OK. And the few times when it isn't, you have to do it again to show your brain that it really is OK. And then you have to keep doing this over and over and over again, for a long time (possibly even the rest of your life). But once you get it under control somewhat, you'll feel loads better.

I used to have bad social anxiety, now I'm OK socially. But I have emetophobia, and that sucks. But hey, lately I haven't even been that worried about getting sick. I've been able to sleep when i feel sick, and even eat when I feel sick. And I think that's because I"m forced to confront it on a daily basis.

Fortunately, SA is an anxiety therapists are used to treating. So is emetophobia. If you have an anxiety that therapists are used to treating, the treatment you experience is often very high quality.

[RJGraveyTrain]

I had pretty severe anxiety, and the only thing that worked for me was forcing myself to rationalize.

I'd take a situation and make myself process the best and worst case scenarios, and then come up with the most likely scenario.

Let's use your situation as an example:

Best case: You go to zumba and have a great time
Worst case: You go to zumba, you make a fool of yourself, people silently judge you and you feel kind of silly, maybe somebody even laughs at you.

Now challenge yourself: How does that worst case scenario TRULY affect you unless you allow it?

They laugh at you: you live, nothing negative truly happens.
You feel embarrassed: Cool, this is temporary and you'll get better at it as time goes on.
They judge you: It can't hurt you, you can't hear what they're thinking, so there's no way for it to truly have any impact on your life once you go home.

With that in mind, come up with the most likely scenario:

You'll go to zumba, you'll be surrounded by people who likely feel just like you do, and for that, they'll be less likely to judge you if you look a little silly because they likely will too. It might be a bit embarrassing but you won't be the only one, and you'll get better at it. You'll feel satisfied that you went, and accomplished because your anxiety didn't stop you from going.

This is what worked for me.

[LifeIsStrange]

Thank you! That's a good idea. Only thing it wouldn't work for is needles, I can't take blood tests or vaccinations, they hurt me so much even if I'm calm, I end up screaming and then passing out. It's the blood test mostly, it physically hurts me a lot, they said my veins are very thin. It's something I can't overcome 😔

[RJGraveyTrain]

Oh I'm the same with needles, I faint when I get blood drawn.

[LifeIsStrange]

They're horrible! 😣

[RJGraveyTrain]

Agreed. o_o

[kaylaS91]

Working out has always helped me keep my anxiety to a minimum. It's great because it's something that will help you feel better not only mentally, but physically as well. Bonus being that it's something that you can do perfectly well all alone so the fact that you don't have many friends shouldn't pose any issues. :)

[hero-hero]

anxiety was and still is my thing.. going through stressful medical studying to more stressful medical work.. you can imagine. there are lots of things i had tried and it works for most of time.. first you have to end any stressful situation you have.. you also need to be more social and have more friends but be only with people who are positive and can tune your brain chemicals.. go more out in fresh air and land scenes. importantly you have to sleep sufficient time and you have to FIX your sleeping times to wake up at 8 AM..
working out and sports also helps.. keep yourself busy.. sure you may not be able to do that all but try to do as you can , the only thing you have to do is the sleep thing.. finally drugs as anxiolytics can help for a short period.. good luck :)

[Alex88F]

it may sound stupid, but to kill anxiety nothing is better than go running in the morning. even fast walking is fine tho. that means free dophamines and you force your brain to recognize outdoor activities as pleasant
you can't fuck with biochemical neuroconditioning!

[yucel_eden]

I actually was gonna say this. You beat me to it.

[Alex88F]

@yucel_eden ;) *brofist*

[LifeIsStrange]

Oh ok, I used to run but then it turned into walking most of the time haha! I can't go in the morning cause of work and getting up before 6:30 would kill me 😂
I do workout 6 days a week but I do it in my house by following videos.

[Alex88F]

try writing! but beware, it's addicting ;)
then gradually try to change your breath to a slow and more relaxated one. it may sound hard but do it when you bathe, with or without relaxating music. close your eyes and breathe. it did wonders for me! hope it does for you as well

[Xfitchick]

Sport. So don't be nervous to go to a Zumba class. And if that step is too much to begin with, go jogging and gradually step into workout classes.

[LifeIsStrange]

It was fun but no where near intense enough for me haha.
I do exercise 6 days a week through videos 😊
I'd like to find a new routine but currently struggling 😕

[Xfitchick]

Then you need high intensity classes: Body pump, circuits, tabata, ...

[FakeName123]

Like any other anxiety is overcome. By facing and confronting the anxiety.

Having fears is completely fine and natural. The difference is that you need to learn how to handle and overcome those fears. Step right into it and come out ahead.

[yucel_eden]

I have very slight general anxiety and severe anxiety from heights.

I deal with this by exercise. If I don't exercise for a period it gets worse.

Cardio is better than strength training for anxiety though.

[LifeIsStrange]

Ah ye, I do exercise 6 days a week, it does help although I get knackered haha.

[takumii]

Wear headphones wherever you go, listen to music , it'll distract you from thinking about your usual chain of toughts that make you anxious. Then day by day reduce the volume of your headphones to the point you no longer need the music. Simple !

[LifeIsStrange]

Ye music helps a lot, good idea, thank you 😊

[ToruMatsuda]

Going for walks usually help, writing down what you think too, sometimes talking about it helps, if you need help you can message me😊

[Decentguy]

you need to spend some time alone and away from people.

[Jungeen]

Just go out more, little by little it will get better, evantually you'll realize that people actually don't give a damn.

[iamwoot]

Therapy. That shit quite literally saved my life.

[Username3568]

Take drugs