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There are two things you can do. 1. Listen to his request and decide to go along with it. Losing weight is 100% about calories in vs calories out (abbreviated as CICO if you want to fo more research online). Basically, you must not consume more energy than you expend per day. To start you must find your Total Daily Energy Expenditure. This is done by using an online calculator where you input your weight, height, activity level, etc. Then they give you an estimate and you should eat at a 500 calorie deficit from that number. If you want to eat more food and still lose weight, you have to expend more energy to offset the increase of calorie intake. This can be done by rowing/biking/running/whatever you enjoy. Track your calories using myfitnesspal and weigh yourself daily when u wake up to keep track of how your weight is being affected. If you're not losing weight you need to lower your caloric intake but if you're losing it too fast (more than 1.5lbs/week) you should slightly increase. There is lots of info online about losing weight.
2. You can decide that you dont want to lose weight and that is something he has to deal with if he wants to stay in a relationship.
The first thing you need to do is stop making the following excuses..
''... Obviously for all the cinema dates and takeaways...''
A whole lot of PC bullshit in the comments. This guy was honest. Him saying ''he'd love her more if she lost weight'' is likely just a way of phrasing it in a nice way. It's not necessarily something to be taken so literally and it's not like he's making demands either.
Some of you guys are so busy having a problem with a man that has standards and the balls to express them honestly, that you forget everyone should be doing the same. No one should be afraid to speak their mind.
To the girl in question, you should lose weight for yourself but there is nothing wrong with using your partners words as encouragement. The simplest way would be to buy a Lady Isokinator and follow the full body workout listed in the manual while eating a decent diet without too much excess.
Uh, I'd personally be super offended if someone told me to lose weight so they love me more... If you think you'll be happier if you lose weight, go for it, but it's your body after all... That being said, rather than heading straight for "eat nothing" type diets, you could look up heathier date spots, since you mentioned that as one reason. Also, instead of eating less snacks, try replacing those snacks with fruits if you feel hungry. Pre-cook meals in bulk and freeze them, instead of takeaway (it's cheaper too). I don't personally think that those "lose weight quick" schemes work, since they seem painful without addressing the source.
Once again though, I think you should lose weight for yourself, not because someone told you to... It ain't their body after all.
Eat healthy food. Make 7 different food on your weekend or free time and put it in the refrigerator. It will save you from eating fast foods. Walk more and when ever you're ready go for a run. Go to gym if you have the time. No flavored soda and Stop eating suger and late night snacks. Less beer and alcohol would help if you drink too much. Eat a full breakfast so you won't crave for food until lunch. And most important tip is , do it for your health not for your boyfriend. It's a smart move to become more healthy.
Well if you want to lose the weight you would have to figure out what works for you.
If your partner wants this maybe they could go on walks with you or make time for exercise.
You might also point out he probably doesn't look the same ether, and in the future nether of you will look like when you started the relationship.
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I'd understand asking you to lose weight to get healthy or say he would find you more attractive but "love you more"? Not what I'd pick as a word choice. As for loosing weight it's more about what you put out then what you put in. Walking and eating less snacks is a good start but to drop weight effectively it's good to do constant things not just walk a bit daily. Things like taking the stairs instead of the elevator is a good example of that. If your into doing workouts then (generally speaking, there are exceptions) it's better to do things that use your own body weight like pushups and situps. Form is always better then repetitions so do it slow and methotical instead of just doing what seems right to get a number. If you wish to use weights then same rule applies where from is the most important thing. To tone the body use low weight high rep. For strength use high weight low rep. Last thing you want to do is starve yourself. Your body will gain more weight trying to save what it can if you do that so don't be afraid to eat a normal amount. Good foods I like are chicken, fish, rice, eggs, and greens. Very filling and you can cook it in enough ways before getting sick of it. Other stuff won't pack on pounds unless you eat it all the time. Hope this helps soon and remember that you find the best improvements if you do it for you not someone else.
1) Diet is 75% of your progress. Get this down right and first. If this isn't in place, most of your efforts will be wasted.
Track what you eat. I'm serious. Yes, it's boring and annoying, but do it. People are incredibly bad at judging what they eat and burn.
If you don't know how much you need to eat to lose weight, look up your BMM (Basal Metabolic Rate). Speak to a nutritionist and physician.
2) Exercise is the other 25%, and it's what determines the little things. Women tend to carry more body fat than men, so you might have to do some cardio. My top advice though is DO NOT BE AFRAID OF LIFTING WEIGHTS. Seriously, do it. No, you won't get bulky. Women have to train incredibly hard and with intent in order to get to even half of what men can do. If that's your goal, go ahead, more power to you, but don't be afraid of looking bulky. It's just not gonna happen without testosterone shots and steroids or years of dedicated training. Building muscle will help you be stronger, healthier, and look toned and lean.
3) Experiment. Stick with basic rules. Don't follow gimmick diets and exercises, but don't be afraid to switch it up. For example, I hate running, but I love to swim. Cardio isn't a single activity. Same with diet. Learn to cook, and get creative or you will get tired of your food and quit fast. Adherence is the most important part to any fitness program.
if you were a teenager when you started dating your boyfriend, and now you're in your 20's, you are gonna gain weight because of biology. a girl may look her best in her 20's, but her metabolism isn't the same as when she was a teenager or as a teenager, it isn't the same as when you were a child. same thing goes for guys as well
also, im not calling you overweight or anything like that because I don't know what you look like, but, go into a calorie deficit and add weight training with cardio (weight training 5 - 6 days a week with 3 - 4 days of cardio at 15 - 30 minutes each [for cardio, weight training should be between 30 minutes to an hour]). just so you know, you won't look like the hulk or all manly from lifting weights simply because you have 90% less testosterone than males do. when guys lift weights, they get bigger. when guys gain fat, they get bigger. when a girl lifts weights, she gets smaller. when a girl gains fat, that's when she looks bigger. remember: weights dont make you bulky, bad nutrition does
Well, you can respect his honestly and willingness to be open with you about it. It depends what you want. If you are happy with your weight and don't feel anything needs to be done, then don't. However, you will risk him ending the relationship. If you want to lose weight, then you need to exercise and diet and eat healthy. There are many ways to do this cheaply or spend money and get professional help. Cheap way is to go for walks every day, or ride your bike for exercise. Eat healthier meals. Just google search for healthy meal recipes and lifestyle help websites. If you want professional help, I recommend joining a gym and maybe paying for some personal training with nutritional guidance as well. My wife has tried several of the weight loss programs and always had the best success with Weight Watchers.
Watch what you and leave the snacks. Eat regularly across the day and become more active. Don't skip breakfast. In order to loose weight you need to burn more calories then you take in. Never starve yourself or take a crash diet. That is very bad for your body and health and counter productive to loosing weight. Make some structured changes in your eating habits and activities and you'll be fine. More importantly do it for yourself and your health. That is what need to motivate you. That in the process your man is happy as well in a good bonus. Sadly men are more visually oriented so your figure can impact how he looks at you, but he should focus more on who you are rather then how you look. Loose the weight for yourself is #1 your man/relationship is #1,5 :) You can do this!
I think he right answer is to break up. So what if you’ve gained weight, my boyfriend has gained a pretty significant amount of weight since we dated but I love his heart more than his body.
However, are you healthy? If you’re unhealthily overweight, continue doing what your doing. Also I want you to love yourself, so if you don’t like your body and losing weight will make you feel better (outside of his opinion) was than I can understand.
I really like yoga, geocaching, hiking. I can relate to the gaining weight thing, but don’t do it just for him.
Difficult to tell. If you want to stay with him it's necessary to be attractive to him of course. That's not ment to be mean but just normal. You can't lose weight just that easy over night. In the first weeks of a diet most of the weight you lose is just water. Fat needs time to get burned and it will only burn if you eat less calories than you need. You don't have to watch all calories now but try to organize yourself. Take all the snacks away. You only need 3 meals a day and it doesn't always have to be something full of sugar. If you realy want to lose weight start the diet now. If you want advice look in the internet. There are millions of advices there. It's easy to lose weight if you want to.
It is not about love but think of it this way. He is more attracted to your previous weight and thinked you were hot to date but now he is less attracted.
Do you care enough to get that attraction back? Would you feel better and hotter if you lost the extra weight?
Gym every other day. Outdoor exercise on the other days. Better diet.
Walking by itself is good exercise but you need to put in a lot to see results if you’re out if shape. Basically walk till you can’t walk anymore, then limp home. Repeat every other day. Take water with you.
He honestly shouldn’t give a fuck unless it becomes a heath issue or you’re obease. But if you were 140 and gained 20lbs he shouldn’t care. If anything he should be your motivation and support system if he’s cares that much. Like goes on the walks with you and you both eat healither thats what will make a difference instead of him just nagging you to lose weight.
Dont torture yourself anyhow with diets, excersises or something unless you like it.
Just walk 1-2 hour with an audiobook/music or whatever. That will give you pleasure of nature around and fresh air (if you are in park or something obviously) and of a good book/music, you can thus ignore the fatigue and have positive emotions about it, that will make losing weight attractive and enjoyable.
That worked well for me, I hate everything that makes me lose weight except for that.
Beyond pleasing him, you should want to get healthy for you. Looking and being physically fit is one of the biggest self confidence boosters. Biologically, women that are in better shape have an easier time with bearing children so that is something that men think about subliminally. If he saysbhebdoesnt love you anymore because of your weight, that's bad, if he would just prefer you the other way it's just what I said above.
Cut sugar out of your diet completely, added sugar that is, sugar in an orange or an apple is fine.
Drink lots of water
Go on runs before breakfast, I get tired of repeating this but vigorous exercise where you sweat heavily and want to give up put push yourself to keep going, this is the cure
If you think you would be healthier or any more confident, go for it. But tell him to shut it with the guilt tripping into losing weight. If you think you are fine the way you are, tell him to suck it up and learn how to handle all that woman or die trying. That's my piece on the subject. Body shaming is not tolerable.
I've seen so many pretty girls that I used to go to high school get fat. I mean my class isn't even 24 so I'm like wtf is going on lol. Honestly screw what your boyfriend thinks. Get healthy for yourself. There's no reason to be fat when we're young and it'll save you a lot of problems down the road.
Look you loose weight if you want never let anyone make you feel less than or not good enough if someone tries to get them out of your life they don't love or respect you
Dump him. He can’t love you for who you are why bother? What happens when you get older? Will he tell you to get fillers or a boob job and he will love you more? It’s not worth it there will be more problems. Next he will say you lips are too small, your nose isn’t perfect. Then you will end up like that botch cat lady who had tons of surgery to please her man. Leave him
That’s the thing your boyfriend shouldn’t tell you to lose weight you should make the decision to lose weight not him it’s your body not his and if he doesn’t love you like he did when you were skinny than dump his ass because he only cares for looks rather than a emotional and mental connection
Count calories and slowly reduce the amount of calories you intake until you start to slowly lose weight. Very important count everything you eat and drink. at least doing that in reverse helped me to gain 10kg.
Just try harder that’s mean he says he love you more does he not love you now? I wouldn’t mind my husband losing a few pounds but I still love him the same
He doesn't love you if he is saying these things to you. Over time in a relationship we change and the love should grow with it. Now say if you were told by your doctor to loose weight for health reason then yes he should be on your ass about it but in a supportive and loving way. He's becoming embarrassed
There's nothing wrong with being honest, but it does matter if he says he'd love you more. Looks should be the sugar on top. Otherwise what will he do when y'all are 80
This a question for him. Why? What about you being smaller is needed? Is it your health? And be honest with yourself. Are you going to be happy with his answer?
He should never tell you anything like that. You should love who your with for every thing about them. However for tips for losing weight: 1, count calories (my fitness pal). 2, try to make food at home more and eat less at dinner and more at breakfast. 3, when walking, your body will get used To it, so you either have to walk longer or jog now and then.
It's just not cool to say he's lve you more if you lost some weight, to me that bulls**t is pure manipulation, like "you lose weight and I give you love". You should lose weight for yourself, not to please him.
Break up with him, and with that you loss 200Lbs+/-. But seriously if you want to lose weight it has to be that you want to not just to keep a shallow prick. Just be you and fuck what others think of you
Tell him to fuck off if he doesn't like what he sees. There are plenty of pther fish in the sea who would for a piece of that ass
Preach
Remind him that skinny chick slide off the bed
He said he would love you more if you lost weight? That means he doesn't love you and what he means to say is that he would lust after you more.
Massive difference!
I see a lot of "leave hims" but not enough "how do you like/love yourself to be". Lose the weight if it makes you *both* happy. I mean, he told you it would be nice. Doesn't sound like he is making demands, or saying he doesn't want to be with you.
If you love this person, lose weight. Seriously.
Not because your gross or anything like that, but it shows that you are willing to sacrifice and care how they see you. If you loose weight and the union goes sour, you're still on top. Win/win
Lose weight if YOU want to lose weight. If you being thin is important to him, but not you, then don’t do it
Dump him.
Lose weight and get hot.
Date someone else.
You win.
Ok for one if a guy loves u he is going to love u regardless of how u look i know how u feel k went from 105 to 155 but i dare my so to tell me something like that
Being a guy, this isn't true. We merely keep our mouths shut because, as you said, "I dare my so to tell me".
No.
girls don't understand how to take it. If i tell you "you're fat loss weight "you're going to complain about how we don't love you enough and then go to the personal attack. The best way to stop this is to keep our mouth shut even tho you complain if we get a little fat and ask the same. you didn't date us when we became a whale for eating so much so we expect you to do the same
@dannyuk ok for one thats really rude and at my height im supposed to weigh between 135 and 145 so im not that much over weigh i was extremely under weight for my height and also if a guy gains weigh it doesn't bother me
It wasn't aimed at you, so no need to feel bad or justify to me your weight.
It's just a general example of what goes through a guys head when a girl puts on weight when your dating.
It's not even connected to healthy weight. If a guy dates a skinny girl he probably likes the skinny look so even if she goes from skinny to healthy it still feels like false advertising.
Were too polite to say it or actually be nasty but I guarantee that's what he's thinking.
Oddly girls seem to care far less about weight in there men. Studies have shown girls actually prefer podgy no idea why seems strange.
Personally I think girls are more connected to personality and perhaps that's the atraction that glossed over the weight gain.
Either way please don't be upset or mad at the answer I don't think many guys would be mean enough to ever say anything. You asked for the opinion and I wanted to give you a true example of the thoughts behind it.
The most proven weight loss plan is the "break up diet". He's not important enough to lose weight in order to keep him. Dump him, then lose the weight to find a new man, then gain it all back.
Tell him to do one everyone has a body for a reason everyone looks good in there own way don't change for some guy
Do sport that is body forming and that you enjoy. Eat three healthy meals per day. Drink water. No takeaway or snacks. And if you really need to snack try out carots and a few nuts
You could start going to the gym, get a personal trainer, eat healthier and when you're looking fine AF dump his bitch ass for not accepting you for who you are
Go to the gym one or two times a weak. Its not that hard.
Loose weight and start working out. If he wants you to be skinny. Then tell him you want him to have a 8-pack and see whats next.
I'll have to sign you up for Tiger Lee's training camp for master training and you can lose a lot of weight with my guidance
Is he saying that because he wants you to be healthy? Is he being rude about it?
No girl dont you force yourself to lose weight, just to satisfy his needs. It is his fault that your like that and he should love you no matter and however big or small you are.
Exercise even more. Put your heart into it. Look up diets you find online.
Only eat when hungry
Count calories
Strict keto diet
Just add up the calories you ate today and when you realize you ate over 2500 calories and probably do everyday you will see how you put on so much weight
If you don't wanna do that you don't have to break up and find someone who likes you for you
Leave him!! You shouldn't have to change who you are for someone. They should love you just the way you are!!
It should come from you when you're ready and want to. It might be important to remind him in some way that you're still you
i think you might need to really examine this relationship-it's not healthy
You could exercise alongside your partner by draging him into it, this would make more fun and get your mind off the work aspect of it.
Does it seem he wants it for himself or for your own good?
Lose weight and look skinny.
Yes. Dump him and lose all 200 pounds.
Unless the weight is affecting your lifestyle or health, then maybe you should (if you're comfortable)
Actually work out maybe?
He wants you healthy.
Lose weight for yourself he seems like a douche
Find another partner
Do it for urself
First of all u should workout
Post your pic
Loose weight
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