Do diets ruin relationships?

[Anonymous]

i've been on the up day down day diet for 5 months and have lost 40lbs yet I'm still 45 lbs heavier than megan fox- that 'ideal' weight where men turn heads and don't find you invisible. We live in such a shallow society! But lately, I've got more unhappy and obsessive and just want to eat normally again but scared of putting the weight on! I want my boyfriend to be with a thin me, not a big me who people feel sorry for.

[Tigerlily]

I totally get what you mean. I've fluctuated 40lbs in my short time on this Earth due to an eating disorder. You're going that way with the obsessiveness and the fear of gaining weight... not to say you WILL get an eating disorder, but that's how it starts sometimes. Make an effort to eat healthily and exercise 3 times a week, eat whatever you want once a week, and keep it balanced. I think my food problems contributed hugely to my past breakups; they wanted to fix me and realized they couldn't, and I guess guys really do want a girl who isn't always complaining about her figure! My current boyfriend finds it immensely frustrating too, and says I'm too picky about what I eat, etc. But in my mind I've always got that demon telling me that if I really let go like he wants me to, I'd just get fat and then he wouldn't find me attractive or want to introduce me to his friends.

I try to balance that by making myself beautiful in other ways - home spa treatments and the like. I still struggle, but for the most part I try to accept that though I'm not skinny like I want to be, I definitely look better after a manicure and a facial than without! I don't know what you look like, but I can assure you you'll FEEL more beautiful if you make a little effort every now and again elsewhere. Try to gradually work your way towards a healthier diet (and here I use 'diet' to mean general food intake, not rules for what you can and can't eat) and exercise plan and remember all of the other things that make you who you are, not just your weight.

[NerdInDenial]

Dramatic dieting have known to cause divorces. When a person is seeking a mate, he or she wants to be in his or her "prime." Thus, dieting means that a person in a relationship may want to seek another mate. Generally, people just go on diets to become more healthy. If you are happy and your boyfriend is happy, why are you worried about society's expectations? Who cares what others think? As long as your relationship is healthy, it doesn't matter if you are dieting or not. More importantly, you can have splurge days on a diet. Besides, you cannot diet forever. Eat less junk and incorporate more nutritious foods.

[Quadrophonic84]

When I see a girl's ribs through the skin, I think about the Jews in concentration camps. Not a turn on.

I think the most gorgeous celebrity out there right now is Christina Hendricks. And in their time, Raquel Welsh, Jayne Mansfield, and Sophia Loren. Full figured, one and all.

[Tigerlily]

That's wonderful, but unfortunately it doesn't change everyone else's opinion!

[Quadrophonic84]

Why should anyone be worried about impressing everyone else? My point is that there are plenty of guys like me. Focus on finding one that will appreciate you for you, not what you could be.