Questions: Health & Fitness

I feel like i have a fairly robust long term memory. I can remember things on a fairly easy basis especially if its something important someone told me

I've been overweight my entire life. Both of my parents had sh*tty genetics and I inherited 100% of all of their sh*tty DNA (it's the main reason why I'll never conceive kids).

I've been contemplating weight loss surgery for a while now, even before I've put on extra weight. Even back in 2018, I was thinking about bariatric surgery, and I weighed less then. I decided against it because it seemed too extreme and I figured proper exercise and diet would be enough.

I've been semi-regularly going to martial arts gyms since 2012. I used to do Jiu Jitsu & Judo, then Boxing, then Powerlifting, then MMA, and here in Korea, Kickboxing. Never lost any weight at all. The number NEVER went down on the scale! Not that it matters or anything, but part of it might be because I have a minor medical condition called Hypothyroidism.

I remember joining a cardio gym shortly after high school in 2006 and having my personal trainer flirt with me and make inappropriate comments towards me, whether she was on the clock or not. It was uncomfortable, because I was 245 lbs (111 kg) back then and even that felt unattractive to me.

In 2013, I first started keeping a daily food log and counting calories (spoiler: it's useless and stupid to do so). I was 275 lbs (128 kg) then.

In early 2019, I remember hitting 300 lbs (136 kg) for the first time and I felt awful about it, because I've never once been a glutton or an overeater.

Now I'm at my heaviest at like 315 lbs (145 lbs), at least.

I'm 181 cm in the morning waking up, and 179 cm at the end of the day.

I f*cking HATE this body of mine, because literally not a single thing about it works right! After years in martial arts gyms and absolutely nothing to show for it, weight wise, I've decided I might as well just get the stomach sleeve surgery since I'm not getting any younger or taller. Doing the surgery will mean I can probably can't do martial arts again or will gain much muscle, but chances are, it's a moot point.