Rather than write another Christmas question, I decided I would write "GaG the Christmas Movie." But, I'm having trouble with the ending. How should the movie end?
GAG The Christmas Movie
Plot Summary Due to a horrible twist of fate, the members of a social media site are forced to spend their Christmas with each other in a cabin on the snowy hillside of GaGTown USA.
As the men overindulge in eggnog, they begin measuring each other's penises, and the girls inquire about each other's favorite Christmas movie. While decorating a tree, an incoming text message alerts one of the girls that she may not be adequate jerk-off material
All is going well until a suddenly a kid from Texas brings in a racists cheescake. The guests instantly begin complaining about social injustice and white superemacy in the Christmas movie they're watching
A good Samaritan asks if anyone loves baby Jesus, and suggests they should sing Christmas Carols. Suddenly a troll-like man declares that God is dead and a tornado is approaching. The Texas man begins a mass shooting and Santa Claus is held at gunpoint. It's up to Ms Claus to save Christmas but she has to convince everyone that a woman is right for the job. GaGTown USA
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VOICE OF THE NARRATOR Oh yeah, I forgot about MGTOWs.
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VOICE OF THE NARRATOR
Morning finally arrived, but not without great excitement. For, nestled in the limbs of that 🎄 Christmas tree, was a hand-written letter:
Dear Children,
Once upon a time, you believed in magic, and as you can see, a story can have as many endings as there are people.
So my question is: If your belief has flown away, in disillusion or in fun, is it therefore the less gone?
The door is suddenly kicked open, at first there is just the howl of the wind, then a red glow and the bark of a rifle going off… it’s Rudolf fully tooled up.
He frees Father Christmas and throws him a weapon. Then Rudolph n Claus take out the Trolls and Anons.
The Elf Squad then arrive and secure the building.
Father Christmas is not a forgiving Chap and takes out the trash, executing the bigots responsible.
MERRY Christmas EVERYONE…. well those not shot to fuck.
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There's a big part of me that wants a male-dominated ending with a storyboard and everything. But, we'll see who the A. I. chooses.
"Total view" of camera: In a confederate-themed house, everyone's cuddling with their dream-partner (everyone is liberally allowed to choose anyone even gender-wise), girls having rings on their finger in bed. On the wall there's a cross on the wall which every 5 seconds turns upside-down and then back (half-half for atheists/satanists and Christians). On the sky there's crescent with a star visible (just like Islamic symbol) while in the garden, there's massive smoke coming from burning some sort of flags (who knows what kind), all of which was made of environmentally friendly and sustainable material. Turns out the house was build tornado-safe and there's even a great fetish community for the ugly girls category. Texas shooter realizes his gun was a toy airsoft pistol which is great since ammo is cheaper for it anyway.
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I really connected with this. Spent my college years in a post-civil war house which was known to host dbeautiful women. Never one in a leather suit though.
As a Published Playwright, And Influencer and Master on Here, Dear, Allow me to HELP. A Christmas Miracle!!! As everyone suddenly gets Together as One on the Same Page, And sees the Blessings of God. The End. Ohh, HUGGS TOOO, No Masks. xxoo
Ending: Tim Taylor, the Tool Guy (played by Tim Allen) breaks into the room with his Binford Tools flame thrower, ignites the place, steps back outside and watches it burn, with all the GAGers inside. As he watches the flames grow, a white-gloved hand taps him on the shoulder, and a voice is heard (off-camera) ... "So, you are guy that knocked me off that roof."
Everyone comes to OlderAndWiser's house for Christmas dinner, and afterwards we exchange gifts and tell stories. People leave promising that we will repeat the same thing next Christmas.
As Mrs. Claus begins her speech, she is heckled by a pink anon for assuming genders and a huge argument breaks out. Now no one in the cabin is sure who has a penis and who does not and accusations and name calling ensue. Suddenly, the sound of a record scratch stops everything when a 13 year old child is spotted in the cabin...
Great story. I would add that the girls worry about not being jerk-off material due to having the wrong boob size.
The unlikely friends somehow have to come together to escape and end up forging the unlikeliest of bonds.
And then roll credits…. Easter egg at the end… one of the characters is not happy with the way things ended and his planning the next phase of bringing Gag members back together to further destroy the progress they’ve made towards social harmony.
Santa Claus commit suicide with a gun in his head and the raideers become a zombie and eat each others and fly away to eat humans around. everyone panicking and run away as the Santas slay flying over the moon
A loud horn is blown which is heard across all of reality and all planets begin to end, resulting in all souls outside of Flash Point’s Earth coming here after Heaven has merged with it
Can you leave out the "mass shooting" part, please? I'm sorry, but I found that to be really inappropriate and in poor taste. I was enjoying reading your post up to that point, but then that just spoiled the whole thing.
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thanks for the suggestion, but Santa being held and gunpoint is the movie's climactic moment. i'd be open to a subplot. like, maybe you could fly off to Europe and live with the soyboys.
