Why I Am A Virgin Till Marriage.

[SomethingAboutCindy]

I know sex doesn't mean much to people these days, pretty much every one of my friends has lost their virginity. I'm 26 and i don't plan on losing my V card till marriage, whats the point you may ask?

Here are a few reasons.

• I DON'T want sex unless I love the person and they love me.

Sure, you can't guarantee it's going to be forever but I know that I want the only man who touches me physically to be my future husband, and if possible and I find the person for me then that will happen.

• If possible, I'd like my future husband to also be a Virgin, weird right? Well I just really love the idea of us have both never been touched, that just makes the idea even more special. It's not a necessity but something I'd like.

I'm also a Christian so it's pretty important to me to wait till marriage..

• If a man is willing to wait till marriage to have sex with me I feel like it proves he loves and respects me and he is a good man.

• Because sex to me means a lot more than it does to most people, to me sex without love is meaningless.

• I have had 2 serious boyfriends, neither of them liked my idea of waiting till marriage. They didn't respect my beliefs, they were pushy and left me because I wasn't willing to go past my beliefs.

Thanks for reading.

¸„.-•~¹°”ˆ˜¨ 𝒞𝒾𝓃𝒹𝓎 ¨˜ˆ”°¹~•-.„¸

[coralee]

I have no qualms with people who want to wait for marriage. If waiting for marriage feels right to you then by all means wait till marriage. The only thing I suggest is going into this with your eyes wide open and not having a romanticized view of sex. Although, sex for the first time doesn't have to hurt it is almost never something to write home about. Dreams of a perfect "first time" on your wedding night are likely to be a massive disappointment. There is of course beauty in first time awkwardness and of learning each others bodies for the first time but it isn't going to be the idealized picture that most first timers build-up in their heads. Sex is just as awkward and messy as it is beautiful and intimate. Most people aren't naturally good at sex. Good sex comes with time, experience (with each other different people have different preferences so even someone with loads of experience with other people isn't going to be necessarily good) and open communication. These are of course not reasons why someone shouldn't wait for marriage, but just a general bit of real life info that people seem scared to admit. Sex isn't magical it's something that all mammals engage in and is a healthy normal part of life. By all means wait until YOU feel ready, but don't romanticize or idealize it.

[Anonymous]

Gonna be hard to do considering a shit load of people just want long term relationships without marriage nowadays.

So now on top of finding a guy who has a personality and look you like you have to make sure marriage is even going to be on the table.

[heyyyyy123]

Good for you for deciding on something you believe in and deciding to stick with it, not a lot of people these days can do such things (when it comes to other things as well). Although, as I have read down in the comments you have already been told what I was going to state.
Make sure you don't place this high mystical importance on sex, I know this makes it seem like you don't put importance on sex, but you are. By making it something this special, because it reality your first time is never really that special. I remember when I was a virgin and I wanted to have sex for the first time with a person I loved (didn't need to be married, but I preferred a relationship of some kind) and it being amazing and romantic. If I had to tell anybody about what it would be like afterwards is that you realize how important it really was. Nothing happened afterwards, I told a couple of people I was relieved to have finally done it and have the experience, and then I got over it lol.
I didn't even lose my virginity with someone I was in a relationship with at the time. Now we are together and he is still the only man I've ever been with, but at the time I didn't see a future with him, didn't love him at all.
I liked him, I felt comfortable with him, I trusted him, and he made me feel good about myself. In my opinion those are the true only things that matter when having sex in general, whether you've known them for years or just met them that night. Sex is sex and its mainly used for reproduction or pleasure, not as some sort of unification. As many people have stated that they can have sex with numerous people and not feel a thing, but there are special people that it is more fun to do it and experience it with. My first time is not my most memorable or most intimate time with my partner by far. As you get to know someone and learn what they like and how they move you understand them more and the experience builds. But your choice is your choice and I think even despite being possibly incompatible with your partner, its very sweet and in the end its your decision. Do what makes you happy.

[DizzyDesii]

Lovely take. Due to being pressured by my ex at age 15 (like you mentioned pushy bfs above), I am not a virgin. But after breaking it off with him, i have been celibate for 8 years. I have a new boyfriend whos a virgin and he's happy to wait til marriage. So we’re both waiting for religious reasons and are already a year in :) hopefully we marry next fall

[Sabretooth]

have you considered having anal sex? i think might be perfect to begin with so that you can still give each other your virginity-just a thought to make the moment better

[DizzyDesii]

@Sabretooth anal is disgusting and im not a virgin. He is.

[Sabretooth]

how is it any more disgusting then traditional? i know

[DizzyDesii]

@Sabretooth shitty af thats what. Very unsanitary

[Sabretooth]

just like any other part of the body if uncleaned. i'm just giving you advise so you can give one virginity to him while he gives you his

[DizzyDesii]

@Sabretooth he doesn't care about that so just stay out of it. I've been celibate 8 years and he's happy about this so leave me alone

[Sabretooth]

why are you getting all upset?

[DizzyDesii]

@Sabretooth for u to say so i can still give him 1 virginity. He doesn't even count my first time since i was taken advantage of so please just stop

[Sabretooth]

stop what? i made one little comment and here you are all upset.

[DizzyDesii]

@Sabretooth it was offensive of u to say “i'm just giving you advise so you can give one virginity to him”... so just stay out if it

[Sabretooth]

never considered an overly offensive type-but fine

[Sabretooth]

look, i'm sorry if i offended you-but if that is all it takes offend you-i think that's something need to work on.

[Anonymous]

I'm the same, I'm 25, but reasoning is a a little bit deeper. It draws from my faith, my experiences and from statistics (marriages are less likely to end in divorce if the woman's a virgin among others). The other difference is that I don't mind and sort of would prefer it if my future husband is more experienced than me. I don't really care how many partners he's had because my type tends to be very attractive to a lot of women so I can't blame him for trying a few. However, I want him to strongly appreciate the fact that I waited.
I've had 2 bf's the first couldn't wait so I left him. The second waited 2yrs and I left due to other issues of compatibility.

[Markasaurous]

I agree as I am Christian and waiting as well, you don't really see that a whole lot anymore. It is awesome that you didn't break your values for some guy, that really shows self control!

Some of my reasons beyond Faith being the main reason are:
+ Shows self control/loyalty/faith
+ I see it as an act of love to wait
+ I value sex as important
+ It makes a stronger connection to have solely one person, an experience no one else can have (more intimacy/trust)
+ A happier marriage and if I remember correctly a less likely chance of divorce, I have the links to those websites for this if you want them.
+ Probably more

[CubsterShura]

I don't even send pictures in skimpy clothes let alone physically touch a guy! And the greatest perk of it is that any dude willing to use us would leave us when they will realize by themselves that we aren't changing ourselves for anyone. Either you deal with it or LEAVE! Yeah that is something that even the guy can say, "deal with it I want pics or else leave" in that case I would be much happier to leave him.

[VegetaSSB]

Well i like your view about marriage and think you deserve to find a man who can respect your view and actually has even a similar view to yours about marriage , i hope you can find even a virgin attractive man that you can love and enjoy yourself being around.

[Catholicgirl22]

Goodtake. As a christian I'm of a like mind and was going to write a take on this but now don't need to.
Do you too find a lot of guys get butthurt, aggressive and argumentative when they find out your a chrisrian girl waiting for marraige to loose your virginity?

[JessForAdvice]

I’m a virgin and I’m 25.
I haven’t necessarily waited this amount of time for a particular reason. It just never happened.
The guys I was with when I was younger weren’t who I loved seriously enough to go through with it.
I’m waiting to find someone who I love and see a future with. Not just a hookup

[DianaCrimson]

I admire you for this decision. Still a little warning that might play a bad joke on you. Being a virgin at this age means that you will be really unexperienced compared to the other girls. If your partner is a virgin too your sex life will be pretty... lets say boring as you had noone else to teach yourself from. I know couples that waited for sex till marriage... divorced because of the crappy sex and because they wanted to break from the cage and experience more.

[Mi2mi2a]

Well there are people who are bad in bed wether they are virgins or not. :)

[DianaCrimson]

@Mi2mi2a Thats absolutelly true. Just sometimes people wonder... "What did i miss" and after some time they wanna try all this things they've missed in their life. I think people should explore a little, get some experience, learn from their mistakes in every aspect and not just sex and when they think they got everything they wanted to try to settle down. That way they dont have regrets of things they didn't do or wanted to try and the experience can bring a ton to the sex table and make that married life sooo much better.

[Mi2mi2a]

while I think that what you said is true in all its aspects however that doesn't correlate having a bad sex in bed with being a virgin before marriage. If anyone is willing to learn then that means they will gain that experience eventually, if not they will be bad in bed virgin or not.

[DianaCrimson]

@Mi2mi2a True. What I've noticed is that highly religious people sometimes see a lot of good and pleasant things as something banned or wrong and won't even consider doing them with their man while he's begging for it. The man of one of my friends asked her to at least read a book just to educate herself on those topics not having to do them just to learn something new. She picked a few books and just by the title he lost hope in things ever getting better. Titles: How to accept your sexuality as a Christian as a new bride - they were 10 years in already... Containing topics such as: What is this creature called man? and so on...
If someone wants to keep their virginity till marriage go on i admire your choice, but dont wait for the sex education till the wedding. Open a book or a blog, interest yourself about those things as after all your man wants to make you happy so please give in return.

[Mi2mi2a]

That's true. I'm a religious person and a virgin and even the notion of talking sex with most of my friend is like a taboo to them. Guys squirm, it is funny as hell. Well, that's one issue as you said for the choice I took that I fear for.

[DianaCrimson]

@Mi2mi2a Just be open minded for new things and everything will be ok. Its great to learn and experience those things together for the first time. Try it, if you dont like it thats ok, but dont just say no and refuse to explore new things that can make your sex life amazing and making you and your man not wanting to be with anyone else as you two are enough for eachother.

[Mi2mi2a]

Sure :) thanks

[DarthLadyKiller]

I am the same. You are smart. My parents got married as virgins and they could not say more how glad they were and how special it made everything. Don't follow the crowd!

[killjoy2017]

Stay strong in your faith Miss and do not compromise, I am sure you will meet a guy who feels the same as you eventually, we are out there still.

[TisforTori]

My fiancé was a virgin when we met there can be something special about being the only person they loved, trusted and wanted enough to share themselves with.

[kolver]

I really undertand your point and its GREAT! Maybe you will not find one guy same like you (Virgin at that age) buut for sure you will find a Guy thats really wana do things like God say and not only for religion.. Maybe I im not virgin but im waiting for my
Genesis 2:18
helper fit for him.

[DiegoO]

I mean, you can wait till marriage but it's not a guarantee that everything will work out well after that, and is not that I wouldn't be patient with a girlfriend who wants to have sex until marriage, it's just that getting to know each other sexually, before marriage, is a plus. A sexual incompability might be there, however I applaud your decision, not many have the guys to hold on until marriage😄

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I are doing the same thing, to honor God. We have both decided to hold off on kissing as well until engagement or possibly till marriage. You are not alone and yes there are men out there willing to honor you and lead you to Christ.

[Angelina25]

You just penned down my exact thoughts.
Love it <3

[WaywardMoose]

I am not religious but saving myself myself for marriage too just for the reasons you mentioned. Its a great way to filter out guys who just want to get in your pants.

[pooper89]

I agree with your choice. He's not going to buy the cow if you're giving away the milk for free

[sodaa_popp]

I had to break off a couple relationships too for that reason. Good for you on sticking to your guns.

[Juxtapose]

It's shameful how many people on this website seem to shun sex and worship virgins. There is nothing wrong with sex before the government gets involved in your relationship! (marriage)

[loveisbeautiful]

I don't usually chime in on things I don't plan on answering. However, being as that I'm use to people telling me I said things I didn't say, where did she shun anyone? You know, it is possible for a person to have a belief but still not care what other people do even though it's against their belief. So, I'm not really getting where the shunning comes in.

[Juxtapose]

@loveisbeautiful I am talking more about the other commenters and people on this website in general.

[loveisbeautiful]

Okay, gotcha. Sorry for the misunderstanding.

[Juxtapose]

@loveisbeautiful No worries, I can see how you saw it that way. A lot is lost in text unless you specify.