I'm 25 years old and my wife is 23. Needless to say, we got married pretty young.
I found out two days ago that my wife has been
committing online infidelity. While we were on a date enjoying ourselves I saw a name pop up on her phone using snapchat. It was a guy's name I saw pop up on her instagram a few months ago while we were laying down, but she said it was nothing. Well, I'm analyst so I easily connected the dots and confronted her about it. Apparently, she met this guy at her job, he found her on social media sites and now they have been conversing online. He's also married so I guess they felt pretty secure committing this infidelity.
This isn't the first time she has done this. She has done some very sneaky and hurtful things in the past before our marriage, but supposedly no physical cheating. I know we've had ups and downs during this first year of marriage, but to sneak around, lock your phone, lay down next to me and commit infidelity in less than a 1 year sounds like a bad sign.
She also admitted that she has thought about cheating on me multiple times. She said she's not attracted to me sexually (but im not even ugly :p) and she has a crazy infatuation with books about affairs.
I love her, but logic tells me this is a sign of things to come because it's in her nature. We started dating when she was 18 and I don't think she was prepared for marriage.
She has been begging me for forgiveness and promises to never do anything like this. I know I can forgive her because I love her, but it may not be the best decision.
Should I end this marriage now and save us both the heartbreak and time?
Most Helpful Girl
It doesn't sound like this is going to work. If she at least found you attractive then I would say stay and try and work things out. Try and help her understand why she is doing this, go to couples counselling and support each other. It could help make your marriage a million times stronger and open up whole avenues of communication, which is absolutely essential to a good relationship.
Do you talk to each other, I mean deep and meaningful conversations or do you just talk about general day to day? If she isn't being mentally stimulated them that could explain why she is seeking an emotional bond with someone else. Do you make the effort to call each other in the day? Look forward to seeing each other? Enjoy each other's company, like actively enjoy it instead of just being in their company? To me it sounds like she isn't getting what she needs from the marriage. Whether you can give that to her is another question and one neither of you probably know the answer to. It all depends of you both really want to work on it. If you do I would really suggest some professional help. Either separately or together.
Marriage is supposed to be a step up from just long term partners, you should stay and try and help each other so you can build a strong foundation for the rest of your marriage.2