Does a wife have to submit to her husband?

[Anonymous]

[TonyBologna25]

To an extent if you want a healthy dynamic in your relationship. Progressives tend to think that deviating from our biological roots is empowering. I've always taken the lead in all of my relationships, and guided us looking out for the best interest of the two of us. Due to biology, men tend to lead in relationships, as it's only natural. I

In order for a man to feel confident, powerful, and almost unstoppable... his woman must respect his judgement, strength, and ability to protect and lead. In order to achieve this, he must demonstrate these abilities to his woman. If his woman likes what she see's, she will naturally submit. If she doesn't trust these traits in him, then she becomes bitchy and resents the man for making her step in and handle these things in a relationship.

Women naturally submit and feel feminine to a man that they see as worthy. When I say submit, I don't mean it in a context of inferiority to a degrading extent. Women are strong and amazing in different ways that men are. They are nurturing, can birth a fucking child, and hold families together.

I personally don't demand in relationships. I fulfill my role as a man, and every woman I've dated responds to that by naturally trusting my ability to look out for the two of us and lead us in the right direction. She helps me and nurtures me and makes my life so much better so that I can continue to be the best version of myself and take care of the two of us in my way, and she can take care of the two of us in her way. It's never been a moment in which I demand her to do dishes or cook or give me a massage before bed. If you're a man, and doing shit correctly, she'll naturally do these things without even having to ask. She likes to do it. I value her opinions and views.

If you deviate away from this basic dynamic between man and woman too much, then the relationship will most likely turn toxic and become unfulfilling for both parties. Not always, but mostly.

__

I'm not entirely sure as to why men sort of accept these women who are masculine by nature and then resent them for it. Human emotions and intimacy are complex, and to suggest everything is 50/50 is sort of asinine. Men and women are very different and it really comes down to balance. Women are much more suited for certain things, just as men are. Let's stop trying to feminize men.

[MikeAndMolly]

No.

A good marriage is based on mutual trust, respect, and affection.

Neither party should truly submit to the will of the other entirely, but should instead both move together on things about which they do not initially agree, and compromise where possible on issues about which they cannot agree entirely.

Now that's not to say that a wife can't play a submissive role in certain contexts (especially the bedroom, if that's what you both want) without fundamentally lowering her position in the relationship. Rather, it's about how you treat each other when the cards are down and life's problems are serious, and also how you treat each other in small ways throughout life's little challenges.

For example, a wife shouldn't submit to her husbands will that they get an abortion if it isn't what she wants. That's an issue that should be decided together, yes, but ultimately she should have final say on that issue if the conflict can't be resolved since it's her body.

As a flip to this issue, a wife who wants her husband to get a vasectomy should be able to be a part of the decision making process, but it should ultimately be up to the husband because it's his body.

On issues like where to move the family or who should be responsible for different household tasks, that's something both people should work to agree on together. A wife shouldn't be relegated to cooking and cleaning just because her husband demands him to. Those responsibilities should be divided up with an attitude of love and service by both people.

For example, strong chemical smells from bleach and other cleaners, and loud droning noises like vacuuming can trigger my fiancee's migrains, so I typically do those things. We cook together or in turns, depending mostly on how we're feeling each night. I have a stronger aversion to bodily fluids than her, so she's more likely to clean up after a sick pet (or eventually maybe child, but I'll bet I won't be able to get away with avoiding diapers for long).

In short, partners should be equals in a healthy relationship.

[btbc92]

Yes. When you get married that is what your vows are for. God made man the head over YOU, and the children. He leads, you follow. If you can't respect your husband, then your not being a good wife. If you see that your husband is not somebody worth following, then you have two things going on. Either you picked the wrong kind of man to marry, or he is not yet ready to lead. That's how most marriages because lacking sex ends in divorce. If you do not want to be lead, don't get married. It's a willing decision. That's why you talk this out and understand why your getting married. To submit doesn't mean you give your free will away. It means to love the person in the submission to love that person. You vowed for richer or poorer, better or worse. To submit doesn't mean 'to be a slave of somebody else's will', it means 'to show love by sacrificing your wants for another person's needs'. If you needed your husband to pick up groceries, should he not 'submit' to your request? If he wanted sex and you don't, does that mean you only have sex when you wanted when it's clear that your body is not just yours ALONE? That's why you do not date, have sex, children or marry a person you have no INTENT of loving and submitting to. There are so many good husbands who get treated like dirt because the wives they wanted to fool around with other men, and treat them as if they can do whatever they want. Like their still unmarried. Marriage is not the same as dating.

[BrittBratt2416]

People take the word submit out of context with that scripture. When people hear the word submit now a days, they think of a master and his dog or slave but that's not what it means. To submit as a wife means to trust your husband as a man who knows how to lead and take care of his family. When men show good leading skills, providing and protect skills, women automatically fall into submission cause we fill safe and secure around him. We can fill easy and rest on our femininity and don't have feel like we're plagued with being the husband and the wife at all times.

And i find it iconic that most of the comments from men saying the woman doesn't have to, but these are the same men who complain about feminism and how it makes them feel emasculated all the time... but now you're saying you don't want a woman to submit to you... that's interesting. As soon as it comes from the Lord's mouth.. then suddenly it's moronic but when women tell you they ain't gonna submit then you start talking about how feminism has ruined women and America.. like which one is it.

[Shamalien]

im not sure those are the same men, those are probably different men. I'm a feminism hating man, it has ruined women across the world, and I believe that a wife should submit to her husband, regardless of who says it, I'm not religious but I know what I want as a man and what I'd be willing to do for a woman that I can have that bond with

[Sabretooth]

well said.

[Unit1]

I'll take that into consideration. Glad i never blamed feminism 😀

[becks3]

The word submit has a certain meaning which you can't deny.
I would not submit to a husband because I want a relationship in which we are equals and partners.
I want a husband not a father for gods sake. Someone who feeds you, takes care of you, handles you? That sounds like a parent ugh.
I want to be a unit with my significant other and not feel like I am allowed to be his wife as long as I provide nice feelings for him.
Even living as a housewife has nothing to do with submitting. It's a choice made by both of them for the sake of family. Men conplain about women because all they do is sit at home and feed of their money.
Well, how about you be a stay at home dad and takw care of the kids, I bet you would not complain then.

[kim45456]

I dont submit any person period. Religions should be forbidden

[kim45456]

@Shamalien submit in which way?

[Shamalien]

@kim45456 submit as in agree to be second in command of the family

[BrittBratt2416]

@kim45456 I'm not surprised, the bible did say that us women would want power over man. But anyway, here's the thing. I don't have a problem with submission or patriarchy, What i have problem with is men who abuse it and are hypocritical. Unfortunately a lot men did abuse their status as leader of the household and forgot the part were the Lord says to "love your wives and not be harsh with them". That's were treating their wives or women lower than dirt instead human shot them in the foot thus brought on feminism.. also a man should get submission if he proves that he's man who can lead and wants to lead his family. Today a lot of men want our submission without doing anything or wanting to give something back in return. If a man tells you he wants submission but at the same time tells you you're a gold digger for expecting him to provide then you have every right not to submit to such man.

[kim45456]

I respect your opinion but i am not traditional😅😅😅 and like to work

[Sabretooth]

@kim45456 as a traditional type-there's nothing in the bible that says you can't. i think it's important to know how and be willing to carry our weight when times come where we're not able-times that will come. i remember this scripture: Genesis 2:18
18 Then Jehovah God said: “It is not good for the man to continue to be alone. I am going to make a ''helper'' for him, as a complement of him.”

[BrittBratt2416]

@becks3 So when you get old or sick one day you don't want your partner to take care of you? you know feeds you, handles you, make sure you're okay cause that feels to much like a parent? What you said doesn't make sense, cause those should be the exact traits that we want in a partner. Someone who is caring and loving to be there for you during your best days and your worst days cause they learned that behavior through their parents. And choosing to be a stay home wife even if the woman doesn't have to in this day and age is basically submitting to your role as the house keeper so that also doesn't make any since either. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying feminism was all bad but we can see that men and women both working really hasn't improved the family structure what so ever. In fact, it actually made it worse cause most women today are working, and still coming home to do chores. If that wasn't true a lot of women still wouldn't be complaining about that sort of thing still happening. A lot women admit that they feel overworked, stressed, tired, and hate that they have to come home and cook etc married or single

[BrittBratt2416]

@kim45456 There's plenty of women who are stay at home mom and work. Like you can work for home.. im just sayin

[kim45456]

No, i can't imagine me being a housewife and i dont want to me😅. It is not for me and i am not even a christian hsha i like to splitting the bills snd housechores

[BrittBratt2416]

@kim45456 go ahead girl, i ain't gonna stay you i was just saying.

[Sabretooth]

hell, a few feel that feminism hasn't really done anything for women in regards to equality-all the benefits but no real effort-as a few women themselves have stated. i saw this vid a while back... just watch: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYIZjv-l8BQ

[BrittBratt2416]

@Sabretooth im gonna have to disagree. Gonna have to say that's a lie, I'm not into radical or the 3rd wave feminism but we can see that it did make a huge difference when it comes to the rights of women. Like we can go down the list of what changed and what benefits it gave women. We can't flat out say that feminism didn't change anything cause that's just not true. Like i see how it's helped when the movement first started and i can also see the draw backs. I see the good and the bad within the feminist movement but with men it seems to just only be bad. So everyone looks at the movement differently.

[Sabretooth]

I meant a few women feel this way. As you can see-they don't really want equally because of trans women-completely ignoring the fact that there are trans men. One girl stated that most girls only work it easy and less dangerous jobs.

[BrittBratt2416]

@Sabretooth mm from what i've seen they seem to see trans men as men to but they definitely do support trans woman a lot more sense trans woman have come out and said they are experiencing violence from biological men. A lot of women can relate to them on that so they tend to support them a little bit more. Yes, most women work less dangerous jobs due to our difference in physical strength. Also dangerous jobs have a requirement in order to do the job, sure women could apply to those jobs if they wanted to but lets be real most men wouldn't want women in such positions cause they want to save themselves and her as well the possible risk or dangers that might occur. There are actual women out there who have said they want to go into dangerous fields of work that are predominately male but we that gets a lot of push back from men. So it's a combination of two things. 1. We choice easier jobs cause of our physicality and 2. men prefer to see men do more riskier/life threatening jobs. Now you can say that's the male ego or the man's internal instinct to protect.

[Unit1]

"If a man tells you he wants submission but at the same time tells you you're a gold digger for expecting him to provide then you have every right not to submit to such man."

Perfectly said! This left a grin in my face 😀 you know it's true.
You go ladies! 😀

[Sabretooth]

my point is that those feminists are using trans women to stonewall their supposed goal while ignoring the fact that guys have trans men going into our restrooms and so forth. again, that was a statement by a woman-i've seen similar instances- i saw a vid where one girl asked if the guy wanted her to split a 20-but she was just playing games. then, there is the merger of boy scouts and girl scouts, you think feminists would be happy... www.businessinsider.com/boy-scouts-allowing-girls-not-a-feminist-win-2018-5

[jennifer_bloom]

Jesus said Moses allowed people to divorce their wives and husbands because the hearts of people were hard. If you love your husband and trust him to not abuse you or exploit you and you want to submit to him - you can. I don't think you should ever submit to somebody you don't love or doesn't love you. I used to be terrified of marriage and child birth and avoided men all my life as a result - then I realized - it wasn't that I was afraid of giving birth or get married - it was that I did not love anybody enough to give birth to their kids.

[chris_987]

Wow how come you find it hard to love

[jennifer_bloom]

@chris_987 I think I just haven't fallen in love like that yet.

[chris_987]

But are you waiting for guy to show you that love first before you can show him love

[jennifer_bloom]

@chris_987 Yes that is it

[chris_987]

But in most countries women are the ones that show love first, and in verse men are supposed to love there wife’s enough to die for them so you might be doing it wrong

[ActiveSh1tter]

What about women who abuse men?

[OlderAndWiser]

"Have to?" = legally required, morally obligated, compelled by Biblical verse?

[sejla]

The Bible was written thousands of years ago. Some things hold up with time other things do not.

[BrotherFrost]

I like how most if not all religions find a way to control the primal in humans. As a rule, women are more emotional than men, and are proven to act on their emotions almost as a rule. The best example is a study on how women vote: it is very important in which cycle she is on the election day because she is more likely to vote for the "more attractive" politician if she does not hate him. That means that a woman without very strong political opinions can decide to vote for person B on election day day if she wanted to vote for person A from the day elections were announced. This means that, as far as politics is concerned, women are more unpredictable than men. Going further, lack of both formal and informal rules in the western societies show this even better, as more and more women are giving in to their primal side: some completely, other partially. As a consequence of this the western society is being destroyed from within. Someone said that woman are more important then men because their moral decline inevitably leads to the destruction of that society, and i i tend to agree. It's fascinating actually.

Based on this, young women do actually need to be held in check either by men or older women who went past their reproductive age and entered menopause.

[R_Cakes91]

You’re full of shit

[BrotherFrost]

@R_Cakes91 Of course. Unless i agree with you. Then i am an intellectual.

[kim45456]

And young men are better? Look at them how immature and shit they are.

[BrotherFrost]

@kim45456 I like how you can't even counter the arguments i have provided and just go straight to name calling. Which yet again proves that women response is emotional.

[kim45456]

It is biology. Women mature way faster. That is why women marry at a young age

[BrotherFrost]

@kim45456 You do realize that maturity in biology refflers to reproduction, right?

[kim45456]

Still your point is stupid

[kim45456]

Nobody choose a politician because he is attractive. Women are not stupid. By that logic all men who vote for trump are dump

[BrotherFrost]

@kim45456 You are hilarious.

[kim45456]

And men tend to be more agressive and emotional too and cause problems because of it while women solve their problems in a calm way

[BrotherFrost]

@kim45456 How are all men voting for trump dumb by that logic?

[BrotherFrost]

@kim45456 Men do tend to be more aggressive while women prefer to be passive-aggressive. That part is true. But your other claim is a complete nonsense.

[mistixs]

Well the Bible says yes, but you need to view it in the Biblical context.
The man is the leader, but Biblical leadership is about serving the people under your authority, even giving your lives for their benefit if necessary (Matt 20:25-28, Phil 2:3-4, Eph 5:25-30).
Men are told to utilize their authority in the same way as Jesus does. Jesus gives people plenty of freedom, and doesn't ask anything without giving 100fold in return (Mark 10:29-30).

So, the answer is yes, but from a biblical perspective, this arrangement is actually more beneficial for women than for men. It puts the women's needs and interests first.

[Tanisha69]

You said it better than I could

[bamesjond0069]

Yes. It isn't slavery like some posters are suggesting. My exgf had some hard things she had to do and i went out of my way to help encourage and enforce her compliance and when it was all over she thanked me so much for making sure she hit her accomplishments. That's and example of how the man should lead a woman. He puts effort into helping her even if the short term it seems bossy or against her wishes. At the end she should be thrilled with the outcomes.

[ImNotGay]

Taking a single verse from the Bible is a dangerous game. Like most religions, they are supposed to be taken as a whole, not pick and choose. From what I know, marriage in our modern world is rarely what it was designed to be by God (not that every marriage is therefore impure or fake, there is just an issue of understanding). Marriage is a covenant meant to represent our ("our" being Christians) relationship with God. The body of Christ (body of believers) take the "wife" role in this covenant. We are meant to submit to God. In this way, the role of "wife" should submit to the role of "husband". In return, the role of husband is to do all things in love, always looking out for the best for the wife, just as God is a loving God.
In application, if the wife is concerned that she cannot or should not submit to the husband, then they should ponder whether they should really get married. Getting married is a covenant of full trust in each other and the real love between each other.

[ImNotGay]

Feel free to discuss further or call me out if you can show me where I am wrong (and why, naturally)

[stardust101]

No, she doesn’t HAVE to. If you want any sort of peace though then at times, it is wise to submit to your husband. I hate that word ‘submit.’ It sounds slave-ish. Just know that its not, God doesn’t want us to live enslaved to our husbands. And when God called women to submit to their man, He also called husbands to love their wives the way God loves the church, which is unconditional love. I don’t know one man who lives up to that command by God. Honestly, when you’re with the right person, you will allow his influence on your life and you will trust him and want to “submit” a lot of the time.

[Dave-from-Illinois]

Those were biblical days. Things change. In 1st Corinthians, you also have women to keep silent in the church and to wear a head covering. Today, many men cannot earn enough to support a family so the wife gets a job to help make ends meet, so why in the hell would she quietly submit when she contributes as much as him? If a woman submits in the sense that she allows him to make financial decisions and she is fine with it then OK, but if she is ever treated like a doormat then she needs to take her KJV bible and shove it up his ass.

[Lliam]

Submit? As if he owns her or something? Like he's King Shit and she is just a weak, mindless, submissive accessory? Lol. Fuck no! That rule was written by a misogynistic, patriarchal culture.
A guy who wants that should get himself a dog. But he doesn't deserve a woman.
A woman doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to do.

Not that there aren't times when a woman should be submissive. Being submissive is feminine. By that, I mean letting the man take the lead, open doors for you and treat you like a lady. When you put your little hand trustingly in his or slip your arm through his, it makes him feel like a million bucks. You can ask for his opinions and his help. He wants to feel like your big, strong hero. It's called playing the lady and gentleman game.

In bed, a man is bigger and stronger. Sex for a woman is a submissive act. The guy can overpower you, position you, etc. But he has absolutely no right to demand things that you don't want.

[Tanisha69]

I don't know... it's kind of the ideal I guess. He should be understanding and kind and not harsh like it says. I think we should be equals but you know... there has to be a head of the family and traditionally that was the guy. I don't realy have a big problem with it because when it comes to doing the taxes or chasing away a creepy guy hanging around the property I kind of want the man to handle that. when it comes to kids and stuff I think the wife should have the final say. I guess I dont have a problem with it.

[arabgoddess]

Some cultures have abused the idea of how women should be submitting to their husband, for e. g. Saudi arabia...
I would be submissive to a husband who has eyes only for me and who would treat me like his queen... Other than that no man is deserving of a woman being submissive to him.

[DiscomfortZone]

Of course she does, if you live in a redneck religious community cult that only exists because of legal loopholes. Nobody has to submit to anyone.

[R_Cakes91]

This passage in Colossians was actually mistranslated. It’s missing quotations because immediately afterwards Paul criticizes the people who said this. The Apostle Paul was a HUGE supporter of women and he had many women working as church leaders. So no, women don’t need to do this.

[bamesjond0069]

And what about Genesis 3:16? Smh. That's some silly feminist propaganda as there are multiple places backing it up. I'd suggest reading the Bible front to back to get the full context instead of cherry picked excerpts most do.

[R_Cakes91]

I’m not cherry picking, I’m providing context to which this passage was written.

Also, the old context was written without forgiveness. Jesus came to excuse the way people were treated in the Old Testament. I grew up in the church and HAVE read the Bible front to back. There many evils in it that no one will talk about. Now THAT is cherry picking

[R_Cakes91]

Old Testament*

[bamesjond0069]

Strange the old testament and the new testament agree. It seems highly more likely it is correct than it is that 99% of biblical scholars are wrong AND the old and new testament disagree. That seems very unlikely.

[R_Cakes91]

Seems like there’s some passages you missed.

[bamesjond0069]

Like?

[R_Cakes91]

There’s some pretty entertaining stories in judges and Deuteronomy

[bamesjond0069]

And so? God specifically made men to lead women and women to follow men. That's what it says in multiple places. Seems safe that God knows what he's doing and wouldn't fill the Bible with everything the opposite of what he wants. But you really think God would make the Bible say in many places the exact opposite of what he wants? That just seems ridiculous.

[R_Cakes91]

I’m not arrogant enough to assume anything about god. All I’m saying is that Colossians is taken out of context by dudes who want control over women. I said nothing about god

[bamesjond0069]

And what's wrong w Genesis 3:16?

[R_Cakes91]

What about it?

[J_Claire]

She doesn’t have to unless it’s an already discussed relationship where submission is expected from the wife. I have one of those arrangements with my girlfriend so yes she “has to” submit, but if we hadn’t decided together that it’s what we both want then there’s no expectation for her to do so

[Juxtapose]

You don't have to submit to your husband, what the fuck is that shit?

[Unit1]

Ditto.

[loveslongnails]

Seems to me the KEY here is " ….. as is fitting in the Lord".
I always understood that to mean it's the man's duty to follow the word of the Lord, conduct himself in a manner that demonstrates it, and thereby be worthy of having the submission of his wife. If the husband isn't submitting to his own Lord, how can a woman submit to her husband?

[Sabretooth]

Quite a few women say that it's less about equality and more about superiority and just making things easy for them.

[ask4any]

By" Traditional Standard's" and what is written in The Bible, yes, a woman is supposed to submit to the Head of the Household and love him as God loved the Church. A husband is required to honor his wife and care for her and love her as God loved the Church!

[tiajoka]

Submission comes in many forms. You can be a dominant woman and still submit to your husband in your own way; mainly I think it's just listening and communicating in a way that you wouldn't with any other man, as well as respecting him as a figure of authority. But do not let him walk all over you, if you're not strong willed or dominant, that can often be an issue; but if you are then it will be hard to submit in general.

[gangster123]

Everyone has a freedom to chose when to submit and when not. Same applies to men.. and to be efficient in a relation both has to be understanding to each other and obey and accept each other for small small things.. which makes life easier and lovely.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Ideally yes since the man should be the leader of the household and that scripture was an instruction to born again Christian women and Christian husbands on how they should live towards each other.

Morover, a woman better very careful who she marries and submits to because she can find herself being controlled and abused by a man if she gives him that kind of power over her.