Guys, is being married to a woman challenging, sometimes I wonder if it's even worth it with females and their emotions/list of demands?

[Anonymous]

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I lucked out with my wife. She's extremely mature and easy-going and we haven't fought passionately a single time yet in 14 years of marriage. She's a Buddhist so she has that whole inner peace thing going like this:

I almost feel as though I married a Zen Buddhist monk: I've only seen her cry 3 times during our entire relationship, for example, and they were all for extremely sad events (losses of loved ones). She's ultimately just a bundle of joy and positivity.

It can help to look for those types of traits when you're dating. I didn't know what to look for when I was in my early 20s until I started to study about Stoicism (similar to Buddhism but minus the spiritual stuff) and started to apply Stoic principles in practice to help myself stay positive and productive in mindset. That helped me to spot women who also have very positive and productive thinking patterns as I learned to cultivate my own.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I've found nothing challenging about marriage with her whatsoever beyond the basic challenges of all marriages like sharing an income (I can't just buy anything I want; while my wife wouldn't make any demands about how I spend money, it'd be too selfish, so I have to think about us now when I spend money and not just me).

[Asker]

I just feel like girls and young women today dont have those feminine qualities to them. I mean I cook, I clean, and I think it's useful to have. But we live in such an odd world where if a guy also wants women to have those motherly qualities and also cooking. I just feel like women want a Henry Cavil type husband -- extremely handsome, tall, rugged, buff, rich while average dudes with average jobs that pay $65k-70k are seen as not worthy. Hence my question is it worth it to even pursue women nowadays.

[Asker]

Women I come across have masculine qualities or they always want to be in charge which is a turn off, I thought marriage was supposed to be this sacred, open, understanding, passionate relationship. I can't stand argumentative women either.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I'm admittedly out of touch with dating nowadays and also in Western cultures (I live in Japan). But I did used to find a lot of my dates in bars and nightclubs originally and that seems similar to me to online dating, in that you really do have to be at the top of your game and stand out very superficially to succeed in those places. You also tend to find mostly horrible women in those places.

But after I gave up on finding relationships in those places, I started to mellow out, made a bunch of friends (both sexes), all hung out together, and met my wife at a picnic that way (friend of a friend). I think that's the best chance to find a good woman is to hang out like that with a community of good people (both sexes) and find love interests there. Also because you get to know each other and develop connections that way, you don't have to be the best-looking guy in the room or be rich. You get judged more for your deeper qualities like having moral integrity and loyalty to your friends.

[tremendousfern]

Some of the best advice I've heard on lifelong relationships is that they always involve a lot of effort from both the husband and wife, but it's worth it and the work you put in will feel very rewarding.

The key is to be picky about finding a woman who wants to put in the effort to make you happy as well. I've seen the same things you have with many women - they're lazy princesses that want to be coddled without having to put in any effort of their own, but not all women are like that either. All the best relationships I've seen both of them are bending over backwards to support each other and build each other up. That's what to look for.

[Anonymous]

It depends on the marriage. Being married to a genuinely good woman is definitely worth it. But that's the thing, it's often the case that you don't know what kind of woman she really is until it's too late. Marriage brings out the worst in some women. They can become very selfish and entitled, and divorce is a reward for those women. That's why half of marriages end in divorce and women file 80% of them.

Bottom line is, all things considered, marriage is an unwise choice for most men today.

[exitseven]

Marriage can be challenging at times. It takes some effort on the part of both people. If you are the type that has to get your way all the time, marriage is not for you.

[Asker]

Nah for me I can be understanding and take a back seat but know my role as a guy to work, to help pay the bills, to cook, to do the outside house work like shovelling, mowing the lawn, etc. My thing is what happens if a girl or a woman is completely stubborn? Then what? Will it last despite a guy or man as calm/easy going.

[Zenpanda]

Don't worry, if you think like that you'll never experience it.

[TheSpider]

Been married 35 years, Its worth it. I couldn't live without her. Two rules. 1) Don't argue 2) if you cuss at her always apologize! Happy Wife, happy life IMHO.