Do you agree with arranged marriages?

[Anonymous]

Say it's part of your culture and you don't necessarily like the thought of it. Your family can't force you to meet with or marry whoever you don't want to, legally, so, you've no reason to follow along with whatever they have planned for you in terms of a potential marriage partner. I don't care much for my family's cultural rules regarding who they choose for whatever reason. I am the the last single pringle in my family and to be frank, I'm okay with that until I find someone on my own.

[DannyUk2017]

I strongly Do Not Agree with arranged marriages...
Those are done only for "gain" purposes, just to keep the wealth flowing, nothing else, if they say is also for the "gene" that is a total Lie. I have seen how the "arranged marriage" ends up, and it ain't pretty. Doesn't matter who it is male/female should be able to Choose for He/She liking and nothing else... As a Marriage is a "built", the stepping stone After the "actual work" is DONE, such as... Geeting to know the person around them, getting to like him/her, love him/her, getting chemistry between him/her, building trust, loyality, comfort between him/her, and after that they can talk about Marriage... Also a Home is BUILT, not Bought...🤷‍♂️

[HawkPerception]

I don't agree with the old concept of it, which was you had to get married to whoever your parents said to marry. But the new concept where it's the same thing as a dating app with the parents doing the filtering for you and you deciding whether you like the person or not isn't such a bad idea to me. I think as long as they're open to you also getting into a relationship with someone that is not arranged, then that's good. The more options someone has, the better it is for them.

I feel nowadays, there aren't as many chances or opportunities for people to meet others in person.

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the maze of love and matchmaking can be trickier than finding your way out of a rom-com plot twist! 💘 When it comes to arranged marriages, here's the scoop from your friendly neighborhood relationship expert: you gotta follow that heart of yours, even if it takes you off the beaten path your family's GPS has set for you.

Imagine, in one corner, love is waving at you, all excited, ready for you to discover it in the most unexpected ways. And in the other, tradition is holding a sign with your name, trying to set you up on a blind date with destiny. It sounds like you're Team Love, and honestly, that's a team I'm cheering for too!

Being the last "single pringle" isn't a bad gig, especially when you're comfortable with your own company and waiting to meet someone who really lights your fire. Pushing against family and cultural expectations is no easy feat, but staying true to what feels right for you is the key to unlocking a love story that's all yours, rather than one that's been written for you. Remember, even in cultures where arranged marriages are common, the most important element in any relationship is genuine connection and affection. So, here's to finding love on your terms, with all the plot twists and heart flutters that come with it! Cheers to your love story, may it be as unique and thrilling as your spirit. 🍾💖

[V_Injector]

Meh... I'm a complete man whore, but at the same time... I know those marriages tend to last because most people have a bad picker... that changes when someone else is making the choices. That's a statistical fact and I won't bother to argue against it. I mean think about it... If I'm just looking for some sticky and don't give a shit about you... I will probably talk you into giving it up and then ghosting you as soon as you're not worth the effort. But, there is a huge roadblock with a couple of adults in front of the girl vetting me down. I probably won't even try to be honest.

So I don't agree, but I don't disagree either.

So you on your own, doing the picking... the chances of you being unrealistic and shooting your shot for guys like me go through the fucking roof. I'm better than you, and I will use you like a practice girl. Because you're getting play from me though, you'll ignore actual good guys that would've done you right. Me, Chad, Tyrone, and Carlos all fist bump about smashing and none of us care about you. Shit... I gave you their numbers when I wanted you to stop texting me. Your body count slowly goes up and your ability to pair bond gets destroyed.

I might be wrong though, think about it... your picker might be fine and you'd rule a sexy buff dude with my six pack abs and giant cock out. Even though I doubt it... sure, I'll believe you. Your parents might pick some dude for their own benefit in some cultures... like a payment. You might be better off choosing on your own and also smart enough to avoid my big veiny pulsating member that just really needs some practice girl action.

[OlderAndWiser]

It is not a part of my culture and all I know is what the media reports about it. That means I have no trustworthy information to form the basis of any opinions.

[LaureenVO]

There is a difference between forced marriage and arranged marriage. Forced marriage is that you can't choose someone yourself. Arranged marriage is that you can choose someone yourself, but you need the acceptance of your parents. Or that you're parents pick someon, but then they need your acceptance aswell. I absolutely disagree with forced marriage. Forced marriage is actually a form of modern slavery and highly illegal. Arranged marriage is acceptable, but I would still not want that for myself. But if that's your culture, I feel like that's fine.

[Asker]

Thank you for parsing left to right the difference between 'arranged' and 'forced'. All too often 'arranged' is deemed to be a low-key coercive tactic parents resort to offering their offspring in the vein hopes of reeling them into a negotiation of agreement based off practical matters, alone. Sure, I'll never say arranged marriages couldn't work out but generally contemporary (liberal) practices don't include needing or mandating parental or guardian evaluation and acceptance or rejection.

[DishLady]

They work for some people and don't work for others. It depends on a lot of very specific factors and should only be addressed on a case-by-case basis...

If you're preparing for an AM, just make sure the other person and the family is very thoroughly explored before committing to the match. There have been some really scary stories revealed from the 1980s-90s. But today with all the available online resources it's presumably easier to research the person and to get to know them for a long while through video chat, etc. ... don't rush into things and make sure you are happy with your choice to be matched/arranged. :)

[godfatherfan]

I don't understand them and I do not at all agree with them. Arranged marriages say "My daughter is only as good as what I can get for her. She isn't smart enough or attractive enough to find a husband of her own".
Honestly, it is a disgusting practice. Why force someone to live a life they don't want to live? Is it possible they will "grow to love each other"? Sure, it is possible. But not probable. All you do is trap a woman in a life where she she is only good for sex, breeding, and being a maid.

[HusamRocks]

I actually find it better because:

1. U don't get too deep with details about that person at first which keeps u excited and worried maybe a little afraid, this lowers ur expectations and being shallow
2. U feel obligated and responsible, love comes after and believe me it lasts
3. U learn how to accept other people's disadvantages but u still like them
4. Marriage is about intimacy, respect and mercy and these things creates love
5. If in any cases that marriage didn't work for u, u get to blame arranged marriage but not urself which is better for ur health 😁
6. Ur parents happiness is part of ur happiness, they also want what's best for u so they will pick the best they can find

There r tons of reasons I just can't remember 😂

[Anonymous]

I’m and esthetician who specializes in body waxing, and have gotten many women nice and bald from head to toe for their arranged marriages. I get to hear either their excitement or contentment but none are ever sad, miserable or uncertain. They’ll gush about all the lavish parties and gifts, show me their outfits, share wedding plans. So if I based my agreement off personal experience, I wouldn’t do it myself but I respect the culture (not saying you don’t) and recognize that for these women, it’s a huge, special milestone that all these women I encounter aren’t the least bit I happy about.

[Asker]

I see. I suppose it must be dependent on the woman's ideals. Marriage didn't cross my mind until I moved out of my parents' house but after some years I've been feeling fine living on my own. Spinsterhood was a consideration then turning to other women (instead of men for marriage). I haven't heard much about marriages between lesbians, however, I suspect there must be a sizable pool who are married to a partner of the same sex.

[Opinion Owner]

Spinsterhood is an incredible word I’ll never forget it😂👏. Yeah, I would definitely agree that it depends on the woman’s ideals or how deeply rooted they are to their religion. In these modern times there are more women rebelling against that and parents who don’t force it onto them. But more often than not, rejecting arranged marriage is a disgrace to the family and completely unacceptable. I’ve even heard of men murdering their daughters for being too westernized.

[Asker]

I'm not close enough with my immediate family to fear disgracing them; at this point in my life, being the single pringle that I am, I've relegated myself to the pile of 'weirdos' and 'beyond hope or saving or salvaging'. One half of my family is deeply religious and the other half is fully dysfunctional, so, it's pretty much a black vs white argument in terms of where they want me to be placed. I don't want either, truthfully. I'll respect that they have their lives to live so long as they respect that I have mine, regardless of how strange/foreign/out-of-the-box it would be to them as to be offensive, off-putting, etc.

[Opinion Owner]

Don’t write yourself off as a lost cause yet, I didn’t have a serious relationship until I turned 30 and we’re still together. Before that I was just like you, super content being single and not eager to hop into a relationship, or just wasn’t a priority and not something I felt I missed out on. I’m not deeply religious either, nor is my family so I guess I can’t relate to those women who are stepping into arranged marriages, the cultural differences are just too vast. I wouldn’t purposely convert to this or that anyway when it’s solely for marriage and not because my own beliefs have changed.

[Asker]

When I typed, "I was beyond saving/salvation." I meant it in so much as "I don't need it nor want it (religion)." Sure, I'll die, but then again... everybody else dies at some point. Nobody can prevent anybody else from dying, one day. Maybe I'll find a relationship but it probably won't be with the opposite sex.

[hahahmm]

Sure because in a culture where that is normal it makes sense. I know a couple from India in their 80s and according to them, happily married. They've lived in the US for 50 years. I'm pretty sure the wife could have left him if she thought that was a good idea.

[RebelinSteel]

Nope, that type of thing while it can result in a good marriage now n then, also sits alongside Honour killings. It’s 2024 and people should have freedom to choose who they want to date, be in a relationship and marry or even not marry and just live together.

[soe11]

• Yes with two parties agreement.
• Prior to agreement must know each other and spent time together.
• Groom and bride should love and living together sufficient amount amount of time.
• Personally I don't agree with Asian style of marriage.
• I live with my girlfriend without marriage with peacefully.

[renodnol32]

As long as they are arranged and not forced. Its basically match making. Its upto the two people who are set up by their families to meet and decide if they want to go ahead with it. That is what real arrange marriage is about. Many confuse it with forced marriage which is totally wrong.

[MacDaddyRico]

Marriage between one man and one woman dates back to 2350 B. C.
But the institution of marriage is thought to be over 4,350 years old, founded in arranged alliances and family ties. Men married men, women married women, cousins married cousins, etc.

[White_Swan_]

I disagree. It's not healthy and it doesn't make sense. In arranged marriage, the intermediaries introduce the person to the one they want to see next to him/her, not the one who suits him/her. Why should someone else choose the person I will marry? In arranged marriages, the parties are like roommates, not life partners. Because there is no passion between them. Generally, people who are not sociable and wimpy choose this.

[PointlessNonsenseGuy]

I don't exactly agree with arranged marriages, but the West isn't doing great with this "Everybody Pick Your Own Spouse" system we've got going. So I'm not going to criticize how other people do it.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No. Your family nor parents are going to be the ones living with nor having sex with someone you most likely aren't going to like physically or personality wise.

[es20490446e]

Arranged marriages have an upside: people will find partners more easily than just trying to do all the work by themselves.

So maybe you can find a substitute for that which doesn't involve giving up on your personal freedom.

[JustinTheGreat]

I don’t agree with them. I know it’s cultural and everything but I don’t see why anyone would agree to marrying a stranger that someone picked for them

[ProbablyClueless]

Love marriage in the West has turned out to be a total shitshow. I find the idea of arranged marriages intriguing. It would definitely take a lot of pressure off of your plate.

[SotiCoto]

I disagree with it when it is forced.
But as an option to be freely chosen, it can give chances to some who would never have them, so it is not without merit.

[Unit1]

My parents ruined my life. Imagine they haven't done enough damage to me and they want to choose someone for me.

I cut them off.

At least Let me ruin my life.

[Amandanator]

Yes, there is nothing wrong with it as long as both people consent on who they are with.

[EmmaMary]

NO I DON'T... I never have, and never will, ever agree to this.

[WhitneySnow]

I would not follow my family’s wishes if I felt the way you did

[Alex-Snow]

Not at all... marriage should be between two loving couples and nothing more

[Anonymous]

Yes because in Hindu culture they make the women marry men with learning difficulties. Women should not have appearance preferences either.

[Asker]

I'm not sure if Hindu culture would consider the woman's side or argument; seeing as how it's sounding mighty patriarchial, now.

[avery58]

So women shouldn't and men should? Funniest thing I've seen today

[Opinion Owner]

@avery58 Men don't tend to, it is just women using a feminist myth that me do to justify it

[Asker]

Yeah, of course, it's not the other way around; men don't want to deal with a disabled woman who isn't a tenner (in the looks department). They want women to cater to and put-up with them (wipe their asses when they can't do it themselves). Men depend on women's empathy thereafter ditch them when they are of no use to them. It's true.

[avery58]

@Opinion owner, most people will only date someone whom they are physically attracted to on some level

[Opinion Owner]

@avery58 Typical millennial or zoomer female

[OhLongJohnsoning]

While i don't agree with them, it's not in my right to say what a culture should and shouldn't do

[legalboxers]

sadly no. Old school ideology with dowry - fuck that shit. Your in 2024, Elders must get this

[Jason2469]

I don't stand by marriages. As one of their victims the whole institution is a scam.

[Iron_Man]

Nope not at all

[Nikki1989]

Nope. I would never agree to it.

[CubaPirate]

Not in the slightest

[DrPepper12]

Not only no but HELL TO THE FUCKING NO!

[Brady]

No, what nationality are you?

[KrakenAttackin]

We can't do any worse than we are now.

[Anonguyfella]

It’s the only way Indians can get a girl lol

[Tim2nice]

No way.

[Anonymous]

Yes.