Hello, I've been challenged by @DM_ME_PUPPERS to present what I am afraid of.
Suggested reading track:
Kiss of Death English Version by Amalee
1. Never having a relationship
My greatest fear is to live my whole life single. It's like a specter constantly haunting every waking moment. One albatross around my neck. I'm often awake to the early morning hour of one unable to dull the feeling. All my friends throughout my life have said "you'll find someone some day" and I'm so fucking sick of that piss-ass saying. Some people die without ever having a relationship. This is a fact of life and at this point, approaching my 30's, its looking more and more like I'm one of those people. In this point in my life all of friends have their own little families. I've already been to a few weddings and even though I was happy for them, it stung. Some day doesn't come for everyone. This is up there with the "there's someone for everyone" cliche. How can people constant say such a thing? What statistical proof do they have for these? There isn't any, because it isn't true.
2. Never creating a book series or novel that will be published
With self-publishing on the rise, you can now bypass the traditional route, but there are still some of us out there that prefer going through the old method. Sure, I have already written two works of fiction that were over fifty thousand words each but, those are now lost forever because I was too stupid to back up my work. If there is one big obstacle for me, it’s fear. I know I don't have previous work published and I am also painfully aware of some of the pitfalls. I hope fruitlessly that my writing will continually improve and that I will be successful. I just want to make a mark on the world, to tell stories even after I've faded away.
3. It may seem juvenile but I am afraid of what comes after death
There is only one guarantee in life. It's that no matter what we do to delay it, we'll die. We are all dust in the wind. I'm afraid of not existing. I don't want to fade, I don't want to extinguish, and yet, that is all that we are fated to do, like a candle in the wind. In most ways it feels like a curse you’re forced to deal with it. But at the same time life does have its very nice moments/qualities that make you grateful to be a living human being. I'm so grateful to have some really good people in my life. If it wasn't for them, I would have committed suicide years ago when I hit rock bottom. I was so depressed.
Anyway, that's it for my rambling.
As always, #Challengeyourself
and I'm trying to get this as a hashtag just because I think it's silly.